Matt: Have you ever felt like you were in a conversational flow state where it's
like everything you say just flat-out works well in today's episode three of
the confidence podcast coaches Jules David and I will show you how to get
into that flow state so you feel like a verbal ninja we'll also show you how to
recover from conversational mistakes because the truth is you are gonna say
the wrong things sometimes so watch the entire episode so that you know how to
own everything you say mistakes included and appear a lot more confident alright
let's get to it welcome to the attractive man podcast
where we help men become better men in these episodes you'll discover how to
improve your dating and relationships how to break through your mental limits
that are holding you back and how to move through life with confidence and
purpose I'm your host Matt Artisan it's kind of like being a kid like you know
we're all connected with ourselves and didn't care what people thought and very
expressive and expansive when we're kids it's kind of like getting back to that
state right whether it's and dancing yeah I agree it's a great tool to just
express yourself in public right you can practice at home and then do it in
public just like all these things talking to the wall practice at home
recording yourself practicing at home stepping into somebody else's shoes
practicing at home and then when this is all over you can do it in public and
practice in public yeah you're right it's literally like being a child that's
always why I go back to those examples of things that I did naturally when I
was a kid and I just didn't accept to do them and put in public because that's
that's the secret and Julie and you know that you and me will just love to go and
loud nightclubs and just have fun and usually we don't yeah in in those places
you cannot talk however we're still charismatic just in the way we present
ourselves like it's it's obvious that we're charismatic we take the space and
that's something you learn only because you get into this flow state like that's
what you said just enjoying how you move is be is you being in flow you're not
asking yourself questions is that if the next move is right or if it's wrong it's
just trying it's just doing whatever you want to do it's it's the same idea with
the philosophy of taking a word and talking about it
doesn't need to make sense it's just you blowing so the core of charisma if we
want to get into into this is more like how to be able to flow and flow is
literally being a child so I love that nice wrap up I want to I want to talk
about that as well because I I don't know if a lot of guys
have experienced social flow state but it's one of the most fun experiences
that you can have as a human is to be in complete flow what the hold pick up guys
would say unstapled you know completely just loose and whatever you say it
doesn't matter people love it there's an energy behind it and it's basically like
I talked a little bit about how that works because when you're out in a
social situation you're taking risks right social flow State and the club is
described easily you're going out you're taking social risks because imagine you
see a couple girls you really like if nervousness around women and automatic
thoughts gonna come up like don't approach them it's dangerous or whatever
you know it's why it's important to be very self awareness you can knock them
out but if you instead just acted and kept acting on those impulses even if
there is fear eventually you knock out so many of these thoughts that would
otherwise stop you from taking action it's like you like let go of the ego
temporarily and you just have this completely free state that no matter
you're just completely connected to your body in the moment and everything you're
saying is perfect all the movements you have are perfect women are noticing you
everywhere like that's what charisma develops into because the more that you
actually do that after you become more more charismatic and this makes you more
charismatic cuz it knocks out all the thoughts and feelings that are stopping
you from always being in a flow state or charismatic yes or you actually really
can definitely come up even when you're practicing at home and you're even if
there's nobody there you're just like okay I'm gonna do what they said in the
podcast then just be you know just speak and it's all nonsense and then you start
judging yourself and you start you know getting in your head like why am I doing
this we're not to do it so I'm gonna listen even at home alone how much
control do you have you just got to own it even you know if
you're saying the most retarded stuff you just own it like okay I said some
stupid shit cool it's kind of like how we say there's there's either good
approaches or funny stories you're gonna make mistakes in
conversation in fact I was hanging out with my family last night and I forget
what I said but it was something that just kind of like slurred out and didn't
make any sense and it just became laughable right that's what people are
afraid of like saying the wrong thing or saying gibberish and bargin say wrong
things so what it becomes laughable it's just the funny story afterwards be
afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing or being free of that because the
fear bags trap you for the rest of your life so guys we gave you some really
awesome exercises start doing them even though they sound weird who cares
wacky sing to yourself talk to the wall or talk to the glass you believe in love
I can feel something inside me spontaneous song at any moment even
during a podcast especially where there's nobody around there's nobody to
judge you and notice what thoughts come up are you judging yourself right and
just notice that notice what comes up and also find one of the best things
what somebody mentioned it earlier is improv find online improv groups because
sometimes I'm traveling all over the world all the time and I can't find
improv groups in every city that I go to I spend a lot of time in Manila and I
haven't been able to find one there but there are online groups and they can be
pretty fun I've tried them out there's also online
Toastmasters groups so you're just practicing speaking in front of other
people plus they're giving you feedback and it's free
yeah and it's well it's cheap I don't know if it's free but it's super cheap
it's like 20 or 30 or 40 bucks a year super cheap almost free
might as well be free you can also hop on
call with some of our wing girls and our female dating coaches and roleplay with
them roleplay the approach roleplay the date roleplay even your energy like like
like looking at them how we said earlier practicing your smile and something we
didn't talk about is the look what are you communicating through your eyes and
they'll give you feedback and they'll tell you how it makes them feel yeah
they'll tell you the things that all the women you're talking to are thinking but
they'll actually say it and this can speed up your progress by leaps and
bounds it can 10x your skills with women and help you connect with them on a
really deep emotional and even sexual level so we have programs like that
during isolation right now during the Cova 19 that can help you with that so
we'll put a link somewhere below in the description and check that out click
that link it'll either be a link to hop on a call where we'll assess your
situation and see if you're a good fit for that program or not or it'll be a
link maybe we'll put a link with some details about the program we haven't
decided yet but check that out take advantage of this opportunity while
you're in our isolation to work on your charisma work on your confidence so that
when this is all over you're a fucking badass
that's all I got to say hey guys and be aware that me and Jules just started a
new program where we help you to go deeper in yourself get in touch with
your inner core and unlock all your limiting beliefs to help you to be more
charismatic without even trying yeah cuz I think charisma really comes from
within right we gave you a lot of outer game things that you can do actual
practical exercises that you can do but when you actually work on how you feel
about yourself in term in term internally I can't speak and shut out
all those demons it speeds up the process of being charismatic being
confident and becoming the man that you want to be significantly you have you
can't just work on the outer game you have to work on the inner game too
because that's really where everything stems from and really the high level
work is using the world the war you see how I pause there and you listen
to me boring tell me using the world to stir up your feelings so that you can
dump on and be a new guy each damn time dump the beliefs thought the stories
prove it to yourself make your mind your bitch because excuse my French because
most people are the victim to their minds you if you don't learn how to tame
that thing or start transforming it or changing thinking and there you're never
gonna have control your life and you can do that through a hard hard action or
you could do it the smart way by taking action and going with them at the same
time use the world to stir up your feelings model that's why I love them
all to work and I breed cats too and I'm excited that we're doing it on on zoo
calls with students the guys will be getting crazy results together they can
literally they can feel your energy shift right it doesn't make that much of
a difference you practice your approaches you can talk about sexual
shame things you're ashamed of sexually right most men can't even say the words
not most but there's men out there they can't even say sex in front of a woman
without getting all flushed in the space so how does safe rejection free place to
bring those feelings up and process them it's a game changer
it really is you can grow faster in three months and you could two years of
trial and error if you do that thing if you do that kind of stuff right so
trying to figure it out by yourself as the biggest mistake that you can do you
are just gonna waste the most valuable asset that you have in your life which
is time blind spots we all we all have blind spots we're all making mistakes
all the time that we're not aware of that we can't see ourselves that's why a
lot of guys go into resignation with anything they try they don't have the
awareness that they're even making that mistake they get heavier and heavier and
heavier and then just give up you can't really in real life pull out a notebook
when you approach a girl it doesn't go well and say hey I'm just trying to be
like a better man right now you mind just telling me the shit that I did that
got you to not be attracted to me and I just I'm just gonna write it down in my
journal so that don't run the other direction very fast I've asked for a
feedback before on approaches though you're good it's just
yeah I'm in a relationship right now they never give you feedback but we will
give you feedback and our models and female coaches will give you feedback
through the zoom role plays I mean it's it's awesome I mean the guys have so
many results and give us so many success stories from even just the online role
plays it's amazing how helpful it is so if you guys want that if you want to
roleplay with models and female dating coaches that are part of the attractive
men team or alright should say and because you want to work on the outer
game with the inner game and you want to jump in or at least get some information
about David and Julian's new program that's gonna supercharge your inner game
make you feel more charismatic confident and this is gonna change who you are
this is gonna change who you are from ever you never gonna be the same or drop
all the caca that's stopping you from getting the cool stuff that you want
just be your own architect and click the link in the description below if you
want to get on a call we're gonna qualify you so bring your a-game because
it's a good example guys we're ready a good example of spontaneous song right
there you can tell Julian's been practicing a lot on his own alright guys
thanks for watching thanks for listening we are the attractive man Jules be a
David vibe mad artisan make sure to subscribe click the bell notification
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you