Hello my wonderful friend! In today's video we're going to be talking about
First Date Tips for Men: Biggest Mistakes to Avoid. You want to make sure you're
not doing these things. The truth is there are several common first date
mistakes that many people have no clue about, they don't even know they exist.
In this video I'm going to be explaining to you some of the biggest first date
mistakes that many men make, simply because they don't know the do's and
don'ts of a first date. But don't worry about that, because after this video you
will be aware of those mistakes and know how to avoid them. Because the truth is,
as important as they are to avoid they're actually pretty simple once
you're aware of them. So sit back, take a deep breath, I gotcha,
you're not going to have to worry about these any more. Now before we get to
those, I want to mention real fast that if this is your first time watching one
of my videos be sure to subscribe and ring that notification bell. My name is
Melannie, I'm a dating and relationship coach for Christian men. I help you find
and attract the girl of your dreams, so you're not gonna want to miss any of the
videos I have coming. So be sure to subscribe,
ring that notification bell, and give me a big thumbs up.
Now I recently did a video, that you can see over here, which is How to Know if
You Should Ask a Girl Out. There's a link in the description if you
have not yet seen that one. And that has really just led to me doing some first
date tips for men, one of which being some of the biggest mistakes to avoid.
I have 5 mistakes for you that are simple to make, but once you're aware of them
are simple to never make ever again. So let's get to it.
Tip number one is don't feel like you have to spend a lot of money. A first
date is just that, it's a first date, and a lot of men feel a lot of pressure
to absolutely "wow" her and spend a lot of money. And I'll be perfectly honest with
you, there are some people on the internet who will tell you to do that
and the truth is those people are wrong. Here's the deal, There are a couple of
reasons you don't want to feel like you have to spend a lot of money on the
first date. One being, if she just wants to get to know you that's why she's on
the date, it's because she wants to get to know you. This is not a status thing
for her, this is not about money, and so if you have to spend a lot of money to
impress her, she's not worth impressing. And if you have a lot of trouble with
girls using you for money, I did a video on that just a little while ago, be sure
to check that one out in the description as well, it will help a lot, but if you are
feeling like you have to spend a lot of money on her there's a really good
chance she's using you. The other thing is as a girl who just wants to get to
know you, if the date is too expensive it can make her feel really awkward.
Especially because a first date is just to get to know if you like each other,
and she can feel a ton of pressure if she feels like you spent a lot of money
on her, so it can make her feel awkward and make her not enjoy the
date as much. And the whole goal here is to get her to enjoy her time with you
and want to spend more time with you. Now I will say, that does not mean you
shouldn't spend money or that you can't spend money, you completely and totally
can, and if you have kind of a more expensive thing that you just wanted to
do anyway and you're just looking for someone to go with you, like maybe a game
or something like that, then by all means it's okay to spend
money, just don't feel like you have to. Now with all that being said, it's
awesome to kind of spoil your date a little bit and do fun things together
and show her that you are willing to spend money when you are with her, but
that's more appropriate when you've been going out for a while. Certainly, that is
something that will mean a lot to her when you've been going out a lot, but
as the first date it can it can cause a lot of pressure. It also sets the
standard really high and can make her feel like you want to do really
expensive dates every time. Mistake number two is going somewhere where you
can't talk. It's kind of become super cliche
"well we'll just do, you know, dinner and a movie." And the truth is, if you've been
going out for a while there's nothing wrong with dinner and a movie.
The purpose of your first date is to decide if you want a second date and for her to
decide if she wants the second date. The only way to know this, or the best way to
know this is to talk to each other, and so it's important to do some activities
where you can talk and get to know each other and laugh and have fun. And those
are actually the types of dates where you make the best memories and have the
most fun with each other. This is not a lifetime commitment, this is just a date,
and so you're just chatting with each other, seeing how you like each other.
If you need some ideas of some fun first date ideas that don't cost a lot of money
and that give you plenty of opportunity to just chat be sure to check out this
video I just did on some awesome date ideas for your first date. Mistake number
three is making it too complex and too complicated. Again a lot of guys feel
like they have to just "wow" her and do something like huge and incredible, and
the truth is again that can make her feel really awkward and it can be very
overwhelming on the first date. The truth is you do not have to "wow" a woman in
order to make her fall in love with you and to be interested in getting to know
you better. You do not have to do something huge and amazing and expensive
and elaborate. If you do, then she's using you and she's not actually interested in you
You want a girl who's interested in you, because the truth is, as a girl, if
I'm interested in a guy, I'm just interested in a guy. And I just want to
talk to him and I get like butterflies in my stomach and I can't think straight
and I just think he's cute and I just want to talk. She wants to have fun, she
wants to make good memories with you and get to know you better, so it does not
have to be elaborate. Keep it simple, that is really the best way to go. If you can
enjoy doing the simple things together then that helps you know that there's a
potential for a long-term relationship here, because long-term
relationships involve doing a lot of simple things together and having a blast.
So don't feel like you have to do anything too elaborate.
Again if you need help coming up with ideas for that, be sure to check out that
link in the description below to my video on some awesome first date ideas.
Now before we get to the final mistakes, I have a quick question for you.
What would your dream date look like? What activities would be the most fun for you?
Whether on a first date or not the first date, I'd love to hear about it in the
comments. Mistake number four is making the first date too long. What could
possibly be worse than planning a two to three hour date, or even an entire day
date, and realizing about 30 minutes into it that you cannot stand this person, or
that you have nothing in common with her? P.S. If you're nervous about knowing what
to talk about in general on a first date be sure to check out this video. I give
you some awesome ideas that make it really fun and easy. But let's pretend
that you're on this date and you find out that you just really don't like this
person and you still have like five hours to go. That's awkward and it's
painful and you don't want to do it. So it's best on a first date to just keep
it short. This gives you a chance to just have some fun together, help you know if
you'd like to see each other again, and leave you excited to see each other
again rather than tired of each other or just tired in general, and
it helps you leave the date on a positive note instead of a more negative note.
Obviously, once you've been going out for a while a longer date is completely
appropriate and very fun, but for the first date it should be avoided.
Now mistake number five to be avoided on your first date is do not take her to
your place, if you live alone. Okay? Just don't do it. A good girl is
instantly going to like freak out and not be
comfortable with that. That is instantly going to make her feel
afraid and awkward and she's not going to be comfortable with it, and it's a
really good way to make sure you never get a second date. Even if your
intentions are completely innocent it will still make her feel awkward. Another
reason to do this is it's really for your own safety too. A lot of guys think
that only girls have problems with this, but the truth is we live in a weird
world, you could get into trouble even if it's simply because she accuses you of
doing something you never did, and you have no witnesses. So long story short,
just avoid being alone at your house. Okay?
Good plan. And there you have it, 5 very common first date mistakes that a
lot of men make, but you don't have to, because now you know what they are and
they're pretty simple to avoid once you're aware of them. Now that you know
some first date mistakes to avoid how would you like to know what makes a girl
fall for you? I have put together a guide for you 17 Traits Christian Women Want
Most in a Man. All you have to do is check out the link in the description
below, it will ask for your name and your email, as soon as you enter that
information I will send it your way. And I have a special bonus there for you as
well, some free training on how to get the girl. You're not going to want to
miss it. Thank you so much again for watching my amazing friend, be sure to
give me a big thumbs up and share with a friend. Again if this is your first time
watching or if you have not yet subscribed, now's the perfect time to do
that and be sure to bring that notification bell. If we're not yet
friends on social media we need to be, so be sure to check out the links for that
in the description below as well. Leave me a comment and let me know which
dating mistake surprised you the most. Thank you so much again my amazing
friend and have an amazing day. [blooper beep] What would you absolutely love to do?
Be sure to leave a comment in the comments- [pause] That sounds dumb. [laughter]
First date mistakes that are going to mess up- [pause] [sigh]
I have no idea where I was going with that. Okay. [end bloopers beep]
Wait, don't go yet. Did you check out the free guide in the description below?
Cuz you should. So do that. It's awesome. You know, I mean and you get to see me,
I'm there. So I mean, that's cool. I kind of feel like we're friends now, so I mean
you know, that's cool. Okay, bye now. [laughter] that was a lot more awkward
than I intended it to be. [laughter]