- I'm thinking it's not like our Easi Singles or is this
you know that in America they have cheese in a can.
- Yeah.
- They're not lovely cans though.
- No.
- They're not my kind of cans.
- I love crackers.
Crackers are my favourite part of cheese, actually.
Yeah. Forget the cheese, just the crackers.
- Cheese! - Ah man! If I'm eating cheese
it's going to get stuck in my braces
and I'm just going to have
yellow teeth with cheese.
- I'm actually not the biggest fan of cheese.
Like if I order a pizza, I will get one without
cheese sometimes. So yeah.
Just bread, tomato.
- Yeah.
- Cheese in a can, okay!
- See, see?
- No need to refrigerate. (laughing)
Cause it's impossible for this to be fresh.
- When your food looks like it's made
in an apocalyptic setting, you know,
it's not going to be good.
- So the actual biscuits that come
with this, they're on the can.
- Serving suggestion and all. - Yes!
- I wasn't expecting that. - (laughing)
That's like a can of spray paint or something.
- Oh no.
- It's so heavy.
- Oh man, it defies gravity.
- I actually don't know how you use this.
- Yeah, so I'm not touching it.
I was leaving it for you to work out.
- Figure it out?
- Does it just automatically come out?
- No.
- (gasping)
- (laughing)
- Ah! - (groaning in disgust)
It's so oily! It's like slipping off my finger!
- Wait, what? What did you do?
- You push it down to the side.
Hours! It took me to figure that out.
- Oh. Oh, Jesus Christ
Oh, that's violent.
- That's disgusting! Look at the residue its left!
- Oh my god.
- Go for it.
- It's very cheesy.
- Thank you, that's enough. - No, I think you need...
- That's, no, I'm not eating that. No, thank you.
- It's not bad.
- It's so cheesy! And the crackers are also cheesy.
So it's just like cheese, cheese, cheese.
- I like the terrible cheese you get
like nachos in the cinema.
It's very much that, but cold.
- Very cheesy cheese.
- I made a very big mistake.
- It's probably the cheesiest cheese I've ever cheesed.
- It's so messy! - Yeah, it is, yeah.
- I don't like messy food.
- I'd love to turn up to like a friend having a little wine
and cheese line with this. Ruining their cheese board.
- Actually. No, nevermind. I'm enjoying this a lot.
- [Producer] Yeah? - Yeah.
- Made with real cheese? I find that hard to believe.
- Yeah!
- It's fine, but you do feel terrible for using it.
It's an insult to dairy.
- Cheese in a can. Great.
- American cheese.
- What was the other one, French?
- It's American. So what does that mean?
- American cheese?
- Is it cheddar?
- There's no such thing as American cheese, is there?
- So is this made out of not real cheese?
Is that the difference?
- Will it taste any different than the last one?
- See the problem here is
you're not too keen on the crackers.
Great catch.
- Can I just say though, "Easy Cheese",
there's nothing easy about this.
Like having cheese as it is would be easy, surely.
Like this took effort to put it into a can.
- It's a terrible design,
imagine you didn't like touching cheese,
like this guy, but you have to touch it to get the cheese.
- No.
- Like look how hard that is. That's weird, right?
- Yeah, It's a bit, um...
- Like, it won't even come off, you have to go "hi-yah!"
- How do you get it out? Maybe I should lick it.
- I'm going to do a little happy face.
- [Shannon] It's so stunning. It looks just like you, John.
- Oh my god.
- We could reenact Lady and the Tramp.
(laughing)
- Come on, little fella, don't be shy.
It's like a little worm
- It's a Donald's cousin, Donaldo,
all the way from Italy. We don't have a lot in common.
- Cheers - Cheersy
- Ah, there it is. Okay.
- Mine's just out to ruin me.
- Not as strong of a taste. There's...
- (clears throat) Sorry.
- Little bit harder textured than the other one.
- I couldn't taste the difference.
- I think this is a bit more milkier than that.
- Yeah. I'm feeling a bit more patriotic
- Less strong taste, it's actually harder.
- I actually liked this one better
cause it's harder texture.
So it's more of what I'm familiar with.
- It might be a bit creamier,
I can't really remember what the other one tasted like.
- Yeah.
- I kind of tried to block it out of my memory.
- Are we really legally allowed to call it cheese though?
Is that really...?
Surely, there is a old Italian woman crying
in her kitchen, seeing this being made.
- It's more like home, you know?
It's like, it's harder. I'm gonna get down with this.
I get down with the kids, you know.
- This is annoying me.
- Those are always a bit too soft for me.
- I want to say pumpkin because it's insanity out there.
But if it's pumpkin, I'm going to cry. But it can't be.
- Sharp Cheddar?
- Now, that should be my rapping name.
- Is that what it's called?
- That's what it's called, yeah.
- That was good, that was good.
- Bit of sharpy cheddar.
- It is sharp, actually,
(laughing)
- It's explosive.
- Does sharp mean slightly gone off and a little bit sour?
Oh, is that what you taste like?
(laughter)
- Slightly gone off and a little sour?
- I would love to see a waiter in a restaurant
coming over, you know, you know
what they do with the pepper sometimes,
to come over and be like,
"Would sir like a bit of sharp cheddar?"
- Here you go. - Thank you.
- Watch where you point that thing.
- How would you like to taste old Johnny?
Ah, yes. Get yourself a sharp cheese here.
- Sharp cheddar, madam? - Please.
- Say when. - Plenty there now, oh!
- The weight.
- I'm getting the hang of it.
Slow down there, sailor.
- If you had Smell-o-vision right now
it smells so bad and cheesy.
- Cheesus Christ that's bad.
- If that came out of me the way it came out of that can,
I'd say my goodbyes.
- Oh man, this is tough. It's like doing a shot.
All right, here we go.
- That's not sharp at all.
- Nope. I'd go as far to say it's a blunt instrument.
- I can't really taste anything there.
- It's all the same. It's all the same.
- It's all the same, yeah.
- It reminds me of something and I don't know what it is.
- Did you ever lick an old man's foot?
- Oh my God.
- That's what that is now.
- It burnt my tongue, but in a bad way where it shouldn't.
(Dónal retches)
- Cheese shouldn't burn you.
- It's the same as the other two.
- Same as normal cheddar, really.
- You know the aftertaste when like, you know
like that's not good.
- It's cow goo, that's what we're eating.
- Oh God, no. - It's cow goo,
- and sometimes goat's goo.
- Did John Sharpson eat that one
and say like, "Is this my cheese?"
- Why did I have to associate myself with this flavour?
Good Lord.
- We're going in--yeah, you regret it now,
don't you, John? - One hundred percent.
- You fucking-- (shouts)
- It got on in there.
- And you'll smell that for the rest of the day now.
- Cheddar and bacon
- why would they ruin bacon like that?
- This is going to be delicious.
- I think it will as well, I'm a big fan of bacon.
- This is where if you get fired from your job
and your wife's just left you, the only cure
is a bottle of this, and straight into the mouth.
- It says with real cheese,
but it doesn't say with real bacon.
That's the worry.
- Oh man, I love the bacon.
- I love the bacon.
- Because this is similar to the second one on this one.
- I don't think I can watch this video when it comes out
because I'll get sick watching it
- My tongue touched it and it just feels
so solid and plasticy.
- It's like a worm! Nothing about any of this
is nice except for the Ritz.
- So just cheese and bacon?
- The acids of the pig is definitely there.
- Oh no.
- You can feel the acids of the pig.
- This poor little pig's soul.
- Yeah, I like it. It's good.
- It's reminding me of something else
that I've eaten before.
- Like packaging material. - (laughing)
- It has a smokey bacon taste to it.
(groaning)
- I go back for more for this one.
The only one I'll go back for more for.
- I'd love to be able to say
it's all stood out. It's better than real cheese.
- I knew you wouldn't like it.
So I just didn't say anything. - You have that one.
- I don't really want it.
- Neither do I. - Do you want this?
- I'm picturing like a fifty year old man
who sits on his La-Z-Boy recliner.
He's wearing a vest and he's
just lathering the cheese on these.
- Yeah
- And he's like "Oh those Red Sox, huh?
If I could go back, I'd hit a million home runs."
- It's not bacon-y flavoured.
It tastes like that fake ham from childhood.
- It's like the worst food of all time.
Dairylea Lunchables.
- If you can't store it in your fridge,
Where do you store that? Like, you don't want that
out on your kitchen table for people
to see when they come in. That's not something...
- Ideally, I'd store in the bin.
- It's probably the worst one.
Am I right in saying that?
- Yeah
- This was lovely.
That's the best one yet.
- Yeah, best one, yet.
You ended on a high, Colin.
Well done, standing ovation, standing ovation, well done.
- I hope you truly enjoy at least one of these.
And I look forward to seeing your video.
Cordially, Thomas McKeown.
Wow. Great Irish name for an American man.
Thomas McKeown, yeah, you owe us a lot of pints for that.
- Yeah.
- And a lot of, a lot of explaining.
- Before you eat something like that,
you got to brie prepared. See what I did there?
- I feel tired, I have a headache.
Everything's gone blurry. It hasn't been good.
It has not been a good day for Dónal.
- I'm Ron Burgundy
- And I'm Veronica Corningstone.
- And if you want to see more
of this cheesiness, then you better--
- Subscribe. - And like.
- And press the bell and click all.
Cheese, we're good.
(laughter)