Ah, how ya' going ya' big bloody beautiful bastards
Heeeeeeere's
Me face!
I've decided to make a video about The Worst People Ever
Which has been a tough decision to make
Cuz' it's hard
Watching annoying videos with annoying people in them back to back
It's a health risk!
Shitty people can rub off on you
But this is the life I chose
And it's a video worth making
There are things to be learnt
From critically analysing dickheads
My definition of the worst people ever is not evil
Like, ya know
Murderers and psychos and dictators
Evil is in a category of its own
And I kind of feel like being a bad person is in the zeitgeist
For some reason
Especially since the pandemic
We've all seen videos of
People acting like big cry babies over wearing masks
"This is my cloth covering over my nose and my mouth"
There's been a rise in scammers
"This influenza"
"That is now"
"Circling the globe"
"You're saying"
"That"
"Silver sssolution would be effective"
And opportunists
A lot of dodgy opportunists out there during the pandemic
"Matt Colbin bought 18,000 bottles of sanitiser"
After the U.S. saw the first Coronavirus death
Anyway virus or no virus, I think I've found
The Worst People Ever on video
And if I showcase them
We might be able to roll BACK
Being a fuckwit
From the zeitgeist
Because it shouldn't be there!
It's not a zeitgeist thing.
So that's my Hero's Journey
Let's fire up some videos
May I have your supervisor's name please
Sir if you don't finish now I'm calling security
Call security, I'm a customer lady
I'm asking your supervisor's name
So I can speak with your supervisor
Because I'm unhappy with the way you're performing your job
Okay, yeah.
A few red flags, early on
"Can I speak to your supervisor"
"I'm a customer"
Ya bloody stating the obvious mate
You're not The Worst Person Ever
If you've ever said those things to someone, okay
Mate y-y could be having
A bad day BUT
Red flags
These are red flags
For some of the worst people ever they are, they are
Is there something funny here?
I don't see the joke
You want to let me in on the joke, Sabrina?
"Is there something funny here, I don't see the joke"
"Sabriner"
Saying her name
That's a big red flag
You know that shit gets condescending
I wish I never had to wear a name tag
When I worked at blockbuster video in 2003
When I was 17.
It turns you
Into a sitting duck
You get thrown under the bus
Strangers shouldn't know your name
It's counterproductive
To stranger danger
I'm fucken pointing
Already
a couple of minutes into this video
I've started pointing at everyone
Your name is yours to disclose to others
In your own time
Fuck name tags
Is it your attitude?
That's the only thing that's funny
Is your attitude
And it stinks
I definitely don't like him
I reckon you stink mate
Take that
*Lil bebbe snarl*
The line is stopped
And you won't serve me
Sir stop harassing her now
-Sir what a ff -We are trying to get-
-Wha How am I harassing her? -NO YOU ARE HARASSING HER!
-HOW AM I HARASSING HER? -YOU ARE HARASSING HER!
I'm a customer!
Yes! Good people assemble!
Fight back!
Fight back
With words
Fight back!
Good people assemble!
Go mind your own business
She's supposed to print my boarding pass
She works here
Tell her to print my boarding pass FATSO
Duuhhhh
Fatso, name calling
You need to break you out of shape. donut-eating, bald piece of crap!
Bloody hell
Imagine actually being this guy's friend
His entire life mission would be to destroy
Your self-worth
Now you're having an emotional breakdown
Are you happy dude?
Who the hell are you, man?
Who are you?!
Who are you? I'm a bully?
Because I'm a customer?
She's the one who's having an emotional breakdown, I'm calm.
Okay yeah, nah we've seen enough
He's made a customer service person cry
He is
One of The Worst People Ever
Uhhh. she's in tears he continues to double down
Thinking he's right
"The customer is always right"
That popular retail job phrase
Can fuck right off
Along with name tags
Fuck 'em
Next video
Let go of his shirt and go home
oh oh seriously?
Yeah seriously, yeah get some help
Okay yeah look, no, no, no
She's drunk we've all been there
We've all been
Drunk and annoying
Haven't we?
Have-Haven't we?
Hueh hueh
I think we have
And it's good to reflect on your actions
The next day
When you're hungover
And you're smashing a Big-Mac
And you're like
"Oh my god I can't believe I did that"
And it's cringeworthy
And that's how you know you're a person
With-with a conscience
Because you don't want to be drunk and annoying
The next time
You're on the sauce
Hopefully this doesn't go too far
She tones it down a bit.
Get in the fucking car!
Get the fuck in the car!
I will fucking - yeah, yeah!
eeehuhhh
She's not toning it down at all
She's entering the realm of drunk
And abusive
Which is
A big level up
From drunk and annoying
Holy shit!
What are you doing?
She's being a litter bug!
She's also a litter bug
WHOA WHAT A SURPRISE!
I guess that's it
I guess I'll see you at the crime scene
Good Night
Good night!
To your medical career
Hoh haw
She did get roasted online a lot back when this happened
Understandably
But yeah we don't need to get
Too angry again
Is what I'm saying everyone, I know I'm already
Getting a bit edgy watching these
But yeah we're here to learn
And observe
And grow
So don't give The Worst People Ever your anger
Don't give it to them
Don't, don't let them let
*I don't know how to write this out*
You know what I'm saying
Anger should be reserved
For extreme circumstances only
This is what The Hulk has taught us
Think about it
Next video
Does anyone else go to supermarkets to squish cakes
What are you DOING NO!
NO!
OH
GOD WHY THOUGH?
WHY?
WHYYY?
RRGHHHH
WHO DOES THAT TO A CAKE?
WHO?
YA KNOW IT'S BAD ENOUGH
Doing this shit to each other!
But to
Assault a cake?!
Like I don't get it
Cakes are a symbol of love
And togetherness
And they're made
With passion by people
Who have
Cookery
And baking skills which I'm in
Fucking awe of
So NO!
You don't
Squish
Cakes
*The giggle of a cockhead*
*The cackle of a fuckwit*
We're doomed.
We're doomed as a species
This has cost about three thousand pounds
I'll pay for it!
And you've just done that to me
I thought you were my my sister, oh my god.
Ah, you liar!
You know liars are The Worst People in the world
I blame the prank genre
For perpetuating this
Behaviour
Prank videos and
And prank shows on T.V.
It's because we're now just seeing this widespread
Attention seeking shit fucker
Globally
To quote my mates at Juice Media
Th-that, no.
It's criminal damage you're gonna go to jail mate.
Simple as that
And you as well
Nothing to do with me
Got it on film!
I ain't do nothing
YES! Good people assemble
Fuck yes!
You know under the frail façade
Of every terrible person
Is a truckload
Of cowardice
Run away coward!
Hahaha, I can make fun of him because I'm
It's the internet and
We're not in the same place so
RUN AWAY COWARD!
*False bravado laughter*
Go on
*More false bravado*
Fuck off!
*Exorbitant amounts of false bravado*
Uhhhhh I'm being a keyboard warrior
I am,
I am
Some days that's okay
Yeah anyway let's continue
Oh not a driving video
What are you doing?
Don't stop on the freeway!
What are you looking at your maps?
That truck is crashing!
That truck crashed!
Just keep going if you missed your turn off!
Just keep going
Act confident
Like a confident driver and turn around
Somewhere later
Don't that truck is
Fucked now as well
Oh well you made your
Turn off well done
Good for you
You piece of shit!
Just turn around later if you miss your turn off
?????
Children are too pure for this world that's all
That's all that video teaches us
The kid knew they were taking
Too many treats
Is it nature or nurture
When someone turns out
To be a dodgy adult
The eternal question of parenting
This parent sure as hell
Is trying to nurture an asshole into existence
Resist, child
Resist your parents teachings
At all costs
I think she will
I think that kid will turn out all right
You know I'm going to have hope
I'm going to let this video
Give me some hope
That this child will end
The vicious, toxic
Family cycle
Of not sharing Halloween treats
With any other families
In the community
She will end that cycle
Shit people don't always breed
More shit people
I'm gonna have hope
If we don't have hope what do we have?
Think about it
Last video
I promise
*annoyed sigh*
She's just not listening to him at all
It's a recurring trait with the worst people ever
Not listening
At all
When someone's trying to give you a bit more context
To something
What time do you think you left?
What time do you think?
Fucken hell....
He's just trying to explain some extenuating circumstances
That require
A smidgen of flexibility
From an employer
I care about punctuality
As much as the next bloke
Alright Miss Offerman, I do
I do but extenuating circumstances
Sometimes
Come on
Is she talking about herself in the third person?
Anyone that says "Who's your boss?" is unfit to be a boss
Say Fire - go with Fire Marshal
Go work for the Fire Marshal, Jonathan
Let the Fire Marshal be your boss
I reckon the Fire Marshal would be a good boss
But Susan Offerman?
Piss off
All we're watching is
Someone get roasted
For having a conscience
Essentially, a bit of integrity
An initiative
And a conscience,
That's a good employee
Not someone that should be roasted
Miss Offerman
You know I'm ending this meeting
I get to have the upper hand
Why-how do you rile someone up interrogate them
And then be like "You know what that's enough, that's enough"
"No more meeting, meeting adjourned"
I said I wouldn't show psychopaths
In this video
But I dunno
A few of the people we've seen on screen here today
Might be one step away
From strangling a kitten
So I apologise for that
And uh, a very
A very common thread between the videos
Is a complete lack of self-awareness
That some of these people
Are the baddies
"Are we the baddies?"
And that's a painful, tragic and frustrating trait to witness
In other humans
Overall it's important to not let narcissistic, morally bankrupt fuck-knuckles
Take up too much
Of your time and energy
So with that said
Deep dive critical analysis
Over
Let's get on with our days
And put
Positive energy
Back into the zeitgeist
All right thanks for watching everyone
keep being a legend
See ya
Politely click the like button and subscribe
And then head over to ozzymanshop.com
If you want to buy the shirt that I was wearing in this very video
Yeah, nah.