-I'm walking into my room. -Uh huh.
-Hopping into my bed.
-Hey, don't stay up too late.
-You don't want to do anything you'll regret.
-I've never regretted anything in my entire life.
-OK, night!
I'm too drunk for sleep.
She's gone.
A book? About cleaning up?
What could ever be in store?
Huh? Ahhh!
-Why did you press that noise? -You didn't answer your phone.
-I was so drunk. -Hmmm, I was there.
-Woah, what happened to your couch?
-I don't know, it looks... gone?
I think I read a book.
-What does a book have to do with your couch?
-What is that book about?
I threw out my beautiful duvet.
-Hey, It's going to be OK.
-What have you done to my home?
-Paul, relax, OK, I get it.
-It sucks you threw out everything you own,
except for the Steve Jobs poster you drew.
-What are we going to do here, Steve?
-Hey, at least you're not hurt.
-I guess you're right, plus now that I've thrown out
everything that ever mattered to me,
I can actually walk to my bed.
-Right, no more bed hops.
-OK, I'm going to the bathroom.
-I'll just stay here. It's been a very long five minutes.
-Hey, I can't tell if you ran out or threw out
all of your toilet paper?
-Uhhhh! What was that?
-And my moisturizer?
-I guess it didn't bring me any joy.
-Well, it cost me $65 dollars.
-Uh oh.
-Why do you sound like a drunk baby?
-You woke me up. -You were asleep for 20 seconds.
-Oh, that's not enough time for me to be acting like this.
-OK, let's go get you some toilet paper and a coffee.
-OK, let me just go grab my shopping tote.
-Uhhh, you know that birthday gift you got me that I look at all the time?
-The relationship scrapbook I made for you?
-Yeah, that one. It's gone.
-Wait, what, Paul?! -Sorry.
-Oh my God!
-Where did you get this book anyway?
-I don't know,
-Actually it appears as though I bought it for you,
for your birthday and forgot to give it to you,
so, uh, this whole thing is your fault.
-My fault? What a creative conclusion Paul.
-Nice to know you actually got me a birthday day gift though.
-Excuse me, I got you a whole birthday cake.
-It was a muffin, and you ate it, and I paid for dinner.
-Well, it was your birthday.
-Wait, don't tell me that you threw out Mister Dog.
From behind the line, it's out.
-Paul! -You said not to tell you.
-Look, this sucks equally for the both of us but at least nobody's hurt.
-Hey, guys, my mom is visiting and crashed on the couch last night.
Have either of you seen her?
-Nope, nevermind. She's downstairs.... in a garbage bag?!
-Honestly, I would love to apologize.
That's just not the kind of person I am.