If you want to be the life of the party, there's really only two things that you need to do.
First, you need to be able to captivate people who you might not know. And second, you need
to be able to make people with different senses of humor laugh.
So in this video, I want to cover six easy ways to become the life of any party. These
are things anyone can do and you do not have to be a comedic genius.
To illustrate these points, we're going to be looking at Jim Carrey. So let's go ahead
and start with Jim's most obvious gag, "playing a character." Watch here how he tells the
story of going out in public wearing disguises.
You know, so I got this mustache and I applied it, and I had thick glasses, I had, you know,
I had a baseball cap, and I kind of thought I was getting away with it okay, you know,
I got inside.
Jim continues and he finally takes his daughter to this concession stand inside the Cirque
du Soleil, thinking that he pulled off his big disguise, and then, this happens. So watch
how the story he tells isn't particularly clever, but it's enhanced by the way that
he embodies and exaggerates the facial expressions, the tone, and the mannerism of the characters
that he plays.
I've heard people say, and maybe you have too, that their lives are just too boring
for good stories, and whenever people say that, I know that they don't get into their characters.
Yes, it's true. Some people's lives just might lend themselves better to cool stories, but
the truth of comedy is that you can make the most normal day hilarious if you give the
characters life, and Jim Carrey demonstrates exactly how to do that. He need to take on
their mannerisms, their facial expressions, their tone, and then, you exaggerate that
for comedic effect. It's incredibly simple and incredibly effective.
Playing the character is also really helpful when you want to use sarcasm without hurting
other people's feelings. So watch here how Jim bashes the band that he's currently singing
with, but does so in a way that is unlikely to make anybody upset.
You'd see, by the way, that Jim is singing overly emphasized, and by the facial expression
that he makes when he disses them that he is joking, right? This isn't serious. He's
playing the diva.
In another video on Robert Downey Jr., I covered how sarcasm can often be a double-edged
sword since it makes people feel bad sometimes. But you absolutely can blunt that effect when
you're playing a dopey character who's being sarcastic. That communicates it's not me saying
this mean thing, it's this over the top idiot.
So this next clip is a bit more subtle, but note, again, how Jim shifts his face and tone
when telling people not to sit down, which could come across as rude, but doesn't.
Again, there, you see that shift in tone to that deeper "what are you sitting down for?"
voice, and that marks the fact that he's kidding, so people are less likely to have negative
feelings when he makes jokes at their expense.
Moving along now to the next ridiculously easy to use tool--SPECIFICITY. And I'm bringing
Bill Burr in for this one because he doesn't do the over the top things that Jim Carrey
does, but he's still a hilarious comedian. In part, because he gets very specific when
he starts telling stories and jokes.
So here he is talking about a Black Friday mob that formed outside of Walmart.
You see right there? He uses Walter Payton's name and the specificity of this helps because
he solidifies that ridiculous image in your head, even if you don't know who Walter Payton
is. There's just something funny about being specific when you're cracking jokes. Watch
here, again, as Bill Burr continues.
If Bill Burr had just said cookies, it wouldn't have been as funny, and if he said mint cookies,
it would have been a bit funnier, but Mint Milano Cookies is super specific, and that
adds to the humor.
So when you are telling funny stories, remember that oddly specific details are your friend.
The next tip gets to the core of confidence and charisma in general. I've talked about
conviction in the 6 Mindsets video, but I want to show you what conviction looks like
in a humorous setting.
Watch now as Jim Carrey stays absolutely committed to the character that he's playing and how
the laughs start coming in only after a few passes at the same joke.
If Jim had backed out halfway through and looked around sheepishly, he just have looked dumb.
You might have experienced this before. You start telling a story or a joke that you know
is funny, but you're nervous, because, maybe, you're in a group of people that you don't
know so well. So you rush it, and by the end, people are just kind of confused as to why
you started speaking in the first place, and then they just go back to resuming a different
conversation.
If you have done this, it's because you didn't stay committed, you bailed too early, and
maybe your body language even apologized for what you're saying as you said it. Staying
committed to a bit just a little bit longer can be the difference between the life of
the party and just looking weird.
For another example, watch how Jim plays out this gag with full commitment in terms of
physical intensity and the amount of time that he spends on this joke.
Now, just to be clear, I am not suggesting that you start spitting out drinks at friends'
parties. Jim is a zany character, so he goes way over the top. But you get the idea of
what commitment looks like. His whole body is into it. He does not hesitate before he
runs off the stage, before he grabs the camera, or even before he grabs that woman out of
the audience to kiss her. I can't show the whole clip, but 2 minutes later, he winds
up back in the studio after having run around outside, taking his shirt off, and he just
continues to push that joke to the next level, which is where the humor comes from.
Again, you don't need to do all that much. Just remember to stay committed, don't hesitate,
and see if you can take your jokes to the next level rather than backing off because
the first joke didn't hit.
So the next tip is to use the element of surprise. A large number of jokes simply come from the
fact that someone did something unexpected and a really excellent way to incorporate
this into your own life is to purposely misinterpret what people say. Watch how Jim does it here.
Obviously, Jim knew what he meant, but he was able to create that surprised laugh by
purposely answering a question that he wasn't asked. The next thing about surprise is that
it doesn't have to be witty. It doesn't have to make sense. An odd surprise for no reason
other than it's odd is plenty to make people laugh. So check out again, Jim, as he makes
this joke that has basically no content.
All he has to do is to pronounce the word weirdly and the surprise is created. Now,
if you're watching this and think that Jim Carrey is too over the top, the nice thing
is that surprise is really easy to create with a deadpan delivery. Jim Carrey's persona
makes people expect that randomness from him all the time. So it doesn't always hit as
hard, but if you have a more deadpan style, you can really work the surprise angle. Watch
here as Bill Burr's tone make you not expect a joke, and then when there is one, it hits
much harder.
By doing the opposite of what Jim Carrey does, and not setting the joke up with a zany character,
the surprise is heightened. So the good news here is that all of these techniques can be
adapted to fit your own style. You just use them in different amounts and with a different
balance. But the truth is all of these techniques together only form the action steps, which
are important. I love to focus on the actions, but mindsets are going to drive a lot of those
little micro-cues that can be the difference between a joke landing and a joke bombing.
So here's some comedic and life philosophy that underscores all of these techniques,
and is going to go a long way towards helping you become the life of the party.
This is one of the paradoxes of being life of the party. If you watched this far and
you enjoyed this channel, it's because a part of you wants to be accepted by other people.
You want to be liked and you do want to be the life of the party, and, honestly, there's
nothing wrong with that. The thing that I would add to Jim's quote is that you need
to figure out whose acceptance you want.
If you want to be accepted by everyone, you will not do any of the stuff that Jim Carrey
does. You won't be weird, you won't make faces, or tell off-putting jokes. You're going to
try to blend in and you will be invisible. So I encourage you not to get attached to
the acceptance of any individual or any particular cool social circle.
Instead, behave in a way that is fun and amusing for you. Treat other people well, and then,
look for acceptance from the people who liked that. In some, first define the kind of person
that you want to be and the kind of people whose acceptance you care about. Do not try
to be accepted by everyone because, then, you truly become invisible. Here's another
little mindset.
That is the kind of attitude that leads to happiness. That's the kind of attitude that
leads to jokes landing. Unfunny people who come across as try hard ask "How can I be
funny?" And I get that is actually the title of some of my videos. I understand that's
what people ask.
But the funniest people ask themselves how can I brighten up others? How can I be playful?
How can I have fun myself? And once you get that, you'll find that a lot of the techniques
I covered flow much more easily, and sometimes, without even thinking about them.
And then, lastly, there's this Jim.
As someone who's done what you're about to go and do, I can tell you from experience,
the effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is.
When he says currency, I think he's referring to the amount of freedom that it grants. Truly,
if you can make people feel good or laugh, you are free in ways that many people never
experience. You're free to form relationships with just about anyone, to have career opportunities
open up that otherwise wouldn't be there, or to date and marry the person that you want
the most.
And I include that quote to thank you for watching this much, and to encourage you to
continue checking out the channel, because I really do think that your ability to affect
other people and to form relationships is the most valuable skill out there. If you
are more interested in that skill, specifically the blueprint to making amazing first impressions,
we set up another video that covers the four emotions that guarantee a great first impression
every time.
You hit those four emotions in the right order, any kind of environment, from the board room
to the bar, a party, it doesn't matter. So if you're curious what those are, click the box
here. It's going to take you to a page where you can submit your email and get immediate
access to that video so that you can begin using those emotions today.
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self. So be sure to subscribe if you want that. If you guys have any video suggestions,
please go ahead, write them down in the Comments.
Jim Carrey was a suggestion that I got from you. I'm happy to have done it. Currently,
I'm working on Arnold Schwarzenegger, which a lot of you have asked for, and a few other
topics, but I'm always open to your feedbacks, so let me know. I hope that you've enjoyed this video and
I will see you in the next one.