Why is it so hard to stick to your new years’ resolutions or make these lifestyle changes
that you want? You want to make these changes and are excited about them but after a short
while, things seem to drift back to your old way of doing things. You aren’t quite as
motivated as you were when you started and it seems more like a chore than anything.
You’ll actually be surprised how easy it is to trick your brain to stay on the path
to reach all of your goals. Today I am talking about how you can stay motivated using the
Goldilocks rule. Let’s get into it.
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I am sure you have fallen into the same trap as I have. You’re ready and eager to start
something new, something that you think and probably will improve your quality of life
or the life of your family. You get started just to find that your motivation has fallen
by the wayside not long after.
That is because you are trying to do too much too soon.
By taking on too much or making drastic changes all of a sudden you’ll see progress stop
before it ever really had a chance to get started. The brain and body can only handle
so much at one time to keep progressing. It’s basically a system overload.
On the other end of the spectrum, we find that a lack of stimulation or challenge leads
to boredom. Boredom is the silent killer of our progress and reaching our daily goals
- it’s overcooking the porridge.
Have you ever experienced either of those? Let me know in the comments.
In the book Atomic Habits by James Clear - which I definitely recommend you read and ill leave
a link in the description where you can get it for free - he talks about something called
the Goldilocks Rule.
The Goldilocks Rule states that humans experience peak motivation when working on tasks that
are right on the edge of their current abilities. Not too hard. Not too easy. Just right.
Your brain absolutely loves a challenge, but only if it is within your optimal zone of
difficulty.
Let’s say you love to play basketball. If you play 1 on 1 against your 5-year-old niece,
you are going to get bored. Dunking on a 5-year-old is only kind of fun once or twice. But it’s
far too easy. There is no challenge there.
Now, what if you were playing 1 on 1 with a professional basketball player like Lebron
James. You are probably going to lose motivation quickly because it is obviously extremely
difficult.
So, imagine playing basketball against someone who is at your level. Your equal. As the game
goes on you make a few baskets then they make a few baskets. You have a good chance of winning,
but only if you really try. You get really focused, every other distraction just seems
to disappear and you find yourself completely immersed at the task that lies in front of
you. The game becomes a challenge of manageable difficulty. This is an excellent example of
the Goldilocks Rule.
Not too hard, not too easy. Just right.
Working on challenges of an optimal level of difficulty has been found to not only be
motivating but also to be a major source of happiness. Psychologist Gilbert Brim said,
“One of the important sources of human happiness is working on tasks at a suitable level of
difficulty, neither too hard nor too easy.” This combination of enjoyment and peak performance
is known as flow, and it is what athletes and performers experience when they are “in
the zone.” Flow is a mental state that occurs when you are so focused on an activity that
the rest of the world fades away. You have to realize that big changes happen
over time by making small changes first, not all at once. You have to find that necessary
balance of challenging yourself yet not taking on too much at the same time. Push yourself
to live on the edge, but not go over. Start small. The key is being consistent over
time which will allow the opportunity for huge growth in whatever your goals are.
You probably aren’t going to be able to maintain going to the gym 2 hours a day, every
day from day 1. You are going to get burnt out and eventually stop going altogether.
It’s too much. But if you start going to the gym 20 minutes a day, that is a much easier
challenge to maintain and be consistent. Naturally over time that 20 minutes will turn
into 30 because 20 minutes is just too easy. You have to up your game to keep yourself
engaged and motivated and to see progress. For the same reason, 30 minutes will turn
into an hour and so on. Before you even realize it, you have reached your goal of hitting
the gym for 2 hours every day, because you have mastered the smaller challenges that
add up to the main goal. That porridge is just right.
If you have enjoyed this video so far, do me a favor, show your appreciation, and hit
that like button. That is gonna tell YouTube that you think other people should check this
video out too. The other key to the Goldilocks rule is to
be able to measure your progress. Seeing yourself make progress in the moment
is incredibly motivating. As psychologist Jonathan Haidt explains, one
of the keys to maintaining motivation is that “you get immediate feedback about how you
are doing at each step.” If you are playing basketball you’ll get
that feedback with each shot you make. If you’re going to the gym it’ll reflect
in the weight you’re using or how many repetitions you’re doing.
In other areas of your life, measurement looks different but is just as crucial for achieving
that blend of motivation and happiness. Regardless of how it is measured, your brain
needs some way to visualize your progress if you are to maintain motivation. You need
to be able to see your wins. The key is to make sure you are paying attention
to and recognizing the small wins. After all, that is going to be what you see the most
as you progress. Every small win will add up to massive growth over time.
We both want to see that immediate gratification but what we usually fail to understand is
that the small everyday victories ARE the ones we need to celebrate.
You get trapped in the thinking that you need to see massive results right away and if you
don’t, then you aren’t doing enough or you are failing. Nothing could be further
from the truth. Those are the victories that are going to continue to motivate you to keep
moving forward. Acknowledge and celebrate them and keep going.
By the way - If you have enjoyed our breakfast brainfood together, consider Buying Me a Coffee
and help support this channel. There is a link in the description where you can do that.
If you are truly wanting to unlock the keys to staying motivated for the long term, it
is as easy as following the Goldilocks Rule and start doing the tasks of manageable difficulty
and once those become easier, keep upping your game to keep challenging yourself. Live
on that edge. And also make sure to have some way to measure
your progress and get immediate feedback on your progress whenever you possibly can.
Wanting to improve your life is easy. Sticking with it is a different story. If you want
to stay motivated for good, then start with a challenge that is just manageable, measure
your progress, and repeat the process consistently. You’ve got this. Now go get it done.
Grab yourself some more brain food to help you level up and love your life & click on
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