[music playing]
CHERYL MAITLAND: HOST: Hello.
Hey.
Thanks for rejoining us.
Have a seat.
All right.
So after decision day, when you both committed
to staying in this marriage, there were continued
arguments, disagreements.
You walking out-- leaving.
Do you think that you would have made
that decision to move out if you'd had the experts still
there?
AMBER: Um, probably not.
I think just having some accountability for my actions
would have helped.
I shouldn't need that.
[laughing] I should have known that on my own.
I
Was just feeling so vulnerable the whole time.
That was my way to get out.
And then once I was out, it was like, oh no, this doesn't help.
It just makes it worse. So--
CHERYL MAITLAND: Did you feel like you
wanted to be back in it after you left
and had that moment of clarity?
Yeah.
I realized I made a mistake.
And--
CHERYL MAITLAND: Did you share that with Dave?
AMBER: Yeah. - Yeah.
I think that-- you know, something I told her
when we talked about things right
after was that we're not just going
to move right back in together.
I think this is a pretty big thing to have done.
I don't think that you can move out on a Saturday
and come back on a Monday.
Like, that just wasn't going to be OK with me.
You know?
CHERYL MAITLAND: So then did that make
you even more frustrated that you'd made that decision?
Yeah.
Well, it made me frustrated at him in that moment.
So I was like, oh, did you want me to move out?
Not if I move back in?
You mean when I move back in?
And that made me go on a whole 'nother spin out of control.
And looking back, now I understand how he felt
and that I did lose some trust there.
But in that moment, I didn't see that.
CHERYL MAITLAND: So Dave, Amber.
The big question everybody wants the answer to--
are you still married?
[music playing]
We are still married.
I mean, legally we are still married.
You know, it's been a tough three months.
It really has been.
CHERYL MAITLAND: So then what happens from here?
You moved out.
You were blindsided.
Where do you go from here?
Do you repair the marriage, or do you not?
AMBER: I mean, for me, I've learned a lot about myself
and the things that I do.
I had an idea of how you felt about me.
I disregarded anything else that didn't confirm
the incorrect, inaccurate ideas I
had that came from insecurity.
And I really do want to fight for this--
to try and reconcile.
To try to make up for the things that I have done wrong.
CHERYL MAITLAND: So Dave, is that what you want?
Would you like to fight for the marriage?
Uh-- honestly, I don't think that we will
be able to reconcile things.
We both hoped that it would be in a different place right now.
But I think the reality is just that it's not.
JESSICA GRIFFIN: If you choose to divorce,
I know that you both are very mature and respectful people.
And I think that you've handled these situations with nothing
but class up until this point.
CHERYL MAITLAND: Pastor Cal, do you
think that this is a relationship
that could be reconciled?
Short answer, absolutely.
I do.
I do believe they could reconcile.
I do believe that there is a way for them to work.
But it's not my marriage.
It's your marriage, so it's your decision.
CHERYL MAITLAND: Do you still love Dave?
I do.
I think I'll always have love for him.
And Dave, for you?
Do you have love? - Absolutely.
Yeah, and I always will.
And I truly mean that.
We went through something so crazy and unique and weird
together, and there will always be that bond.
CHERYL MAITLAND: Amber, Dave, thank
you both so much for being truly so honest and open with us
today.
And we're going to see you back out here in a little bit
with the other couples.
Thank you guys.
BOTH: Thank you.