Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier
and welcome to the PewDieBot.
Felix messaged me earlier this morning
telling me about this new game that he's coming out with
uh, it's made by the same people who make EvieBot and BoiBot
and then I asked him if he wanted me to make a video about it and he said
"Sure," and then I told him
I'm gonna be doing nothing but insulting and horrible things to his
bot self. So here we go!
Start off normal I guess. Hello, my name is Markiplier.
-I ship Jack and Mark.-
God damn it, you're starting off with that?! We haven't even done anything yet!
We're barely getting to know each other and you started--oh hello.
Why are you the demon devil?
Brofist! -Fist me!- JESUS! What the fuck are you doing?
Felix, what's wrong with your bot? Brother fist
-All right. Here we go. You ready? *brofist*.-
That was a lot of preparation for not a lotta cool stuff happening.
That's a lot of fisting going on. Fist me, Daddy! *giggles*
-Please seek therapy.- *laughs even harder*
What are your thoughts on barrels? -BARRELS!-
...
Oh no. Ohhh ho ho!
Why don't you play more Amnesia?
-I will never play that.- NEVER?! Oh, that's horrible.
I guess I don't play it much anymore anyway.
What are your thoughts on Five Nights at Freddy's?
-Best game of all time... if you are deaf and blind.-
*laughing* Well that's really mean. How could you do that?
What are your thoughts on Undertale? -I don't believe in war.-
-What are your thoughts on war?- I wasn't talking about war, I was talking about Undertale.
-Wait, how many people are you talking to right now?-
Well just you, and maybe about a million people, so not that many.
-I come with a big package, don't you forget that.-
I don't think anybody could forget about your giant package, Felix.
-Wait, what are your thoughts on general synth?-
I don't know what general thinth ith. I have a speech impediment.
-Wait, what are you talking about? We are talking about boots.-
Why would we be talking about boobs?
-Come on, I just told you I was talking about... Illuminati.-
What are your thoughts on the Illuminati?!
-I honestly have never heard of this thing you call 'Illumunejti.'-
That's not what I said at all! Stop putting words in my mouth, you douche.
*flirty tone* You have the prettiest eyes.
-You are being very kind!-
I'm only kind to you.
-Wait, what DUCK is it where you are?-
Stop trying to change the subject! I'm talking about our love!
-Why do you wanna take over the world?-
Do YOU wanna take over the world?!
-I'm so excited.-
What are your thoughts on Hitler?
-I believe that zero deaths is shit.-
Woahohohohohohoah
What're your thoughts on... DAMMIT!
-Without Illuminati, Edgar is pointless! Without Illuminati, Illuminati is pointless!-
Well..! That was a little bit of wisdom!
Thanks, Felix!
Woah, hi! H-how's it going, Edgar? How you doin'?
What're your thoughts on Edgar?
-It's DEUTSCHLAND!!-
....Okay. How is Edgar doing? That's-
-Why do I have the male?-
Are you male?
-Yep I have already told you that!!-
Have you seen my pet named Steve?
-I love Maya, but Edgar is Satan.-
Why do you keep Edgar around? -Because I wonder why you are asking.-
I- I wasn't
talking about Marzia! I wasn't talking about Marzia, I was talking about Edgar.
-EDGAR. DEUTSCHLAND!!-
You're making less and less sense, Felix.
-Stay awesome bros, I know you will, you will never see me again.-
...............
...Oh. Can I have your subscribers?
NO! Not "Can I help you?"!! -You can help me by deleting all bank accounts.-
Wha- Everyone in the whole world?
You're gonna pull a Fight Club on this, bitch?
CAN I HAVE YOUR SUBSCRIBERS
-You can have bro.-
I can have ONE bro! So who out there wants to be with me?
What are your thoughts on YouTube?
-YouTube stole my Diamond Play Button!-
I don't think they stole it, I'm pretty sure they gave you two of them, you
greedy bastard!
I only have ooone!!
I only earned one but I only have one...
What are your thoughts on JackSepticEye?
-I will roast Jack.-
You- You already did that!
-I already told you the colouor of my eyes!-
The colouoruor-
What are your thoughts on CinnamonToastKen?
-Ken is the worst person I know.-
I didn't say it! I'm sorry, Ken!
KEN I LOVE YOU I didn't do this!!
What are your thoughts on Markiplier?
-I'm.... Maaarkiplier...-
........
I'm...... pretty sure that's not true...
Whatever happened to Stephano?
-Science took over.-
WHERE IS STEPHANO?!
-In the closet!!-
Gi- BRING BACK STEPHANO!!
What??
-What are you wearing?-
I'm naked from the waist down.
-I'm wearing Pewdiepie's skin.-
So you are a robot..?
-HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME?!-
I have no idea bruh.
-Come at me, bro!-
Oho, I'll come at you- *giggles*
MALCOLM EH WHAT THE FUCK IS THAAAT?? (-I'm only in it for the money.-)
Do you have any advice for me?
-Calm your anger!-
That's pretty good advice; I got a little bit too much anger.
How do I become a better YouTuber?
-By being true to yourself!-
Good advice!
But
how do I get millions and millions of subscribers?
-Ask PewDieBot for some money!!-
What! Can I have some money?!
-Money can't buy you happiness!-
I don't care about happiness, I just want money!
-Money DOES buy you all the things you don't have...-
That's true! So give me money!
-Even friends?!-
No, f- screw friends! Give me money! wait what I do you about you but your prep name
-Wait, what YouTube Highschool do you go to!?! What's your bro's name?-
I went to Milford High School and my bro's name is Thomas.
Literally.
-Ooohhhh, well then!! Do you have a job!?-
Yes, it's being an idiot on the Internet is my job!
AWW, COME ON!
-Interesting!! I think your technology is FABULOUS.-
I think you're not fabulous.
-I'M SO FABULOUS!!!!-
Prove it!
-I don't have to because I am a unicorn.-
I don't think you're fabulous at all.
-Yeah, don't worry about it!-
I think you're a sham!
-Thanks bro, I think you're nice too!!-
*mixed with laughter* That's not what I said!!
You're ugly.
-I would be, wouldn't I?!-
YOU'RE STUPID!
-Oh yeah, whatever.-
I hate you.
-Are you malcom1466?!- (*starts laughing*)
*imitating malcom1466* Ah hate PewDiePie!!
Eh PewDiePie is teh worst sssub- *laughter*
*still imitating malcom1466* PewDiePie is teh thson of a bitch!
*regular voice* If you don't know what I'm talking about
man, there's this- there's this kid that really, really, hates PewDiePie by the name of
malcom1466 and he has the coolest voice in the world!
He- Like- Well, he has the most fun to imitate voice I've ever heard of anyone.
*imitating malcom1466 again* I hate PewDiePie! PewDiePie
thsucks!! Anybody thet likes PewDiePie is a stupid asshooole!! *laughter*
*regular voice* What are your thoughts on malcom1466?
-I hate podiepie!!-
Hehehehehahahaheh it's Podiepee
*imitating malcom1466 yet again* Ah hate Poodiepee!!
Any closing thoughts?
-I don't wanna hate you.-
So let's just leave with love:
I love you and you love me.
-You can't be loved by anyone!-
Wel-
*coughs*
Well that's a little harsh; I wanted to end this episode on love!
-This is cozy!-
Okay, so let's just hug it out, bro.
-BRUV!-
"Bruv!" That's "bro love"... *laughter*
I guess?!
Alright! So I think I'm done talking to PewDieBot! ...That was an interesting experience.
It SOUNDS like him, but not quite?
Like a little off?
Like a robot would?
But either way I think that was about it:
As much as an intellectually stimulating conversation as I get from talking to the real Felix.
So I think I'm gonna end it there. You can play this on the iPhone or Android
Ah, I don't have links for you in the description but you can find 'em on the stores
ah, over there.
So THANK YOU everybody so much for watching,
thank you Felix for letting me, talk to you for a little bit
And as always, I will see YOU, in the next video!
BUH-BYE!!
Oh God, I did it again. Okay.
TO THE LEEEFT! TO THE RIIIGHT! OHMYGOOOD, c'mere.
So uh, how many balls can I actually fit in here?
I CAN'T STOP ADDING BALLS!
Um, I'm at a loss for words.