There are so many Five Guys items to choose from, it's hard to know where to begin. What is
the best thing on the menu? Come on this greasy, peanut-oil-infused journey with us to find out.
Here are the most popular Five Guys menu items, from worst to best.
The Five Guys grilled cheese has a legitimate cult following, but after tasting it, we couldn't
help but wonder which higher power that cult is loyal to. Is it the cheese? The insanely sweet,
overly thick slabs of American cheese that are piled between toast hardly seem worthy of worship.
Is it the bread? This well-oiled toast is good, sure, but definitely not the stuff of legend.
Of course, it could just be the simple yet profound combination of cheese and
bread that gets fans so excited for Five Guys grilled cheese. However, if you're looking to
indulge in cheese and bread, there are other, more rewarding ways to invest those calories,
like a cheesy bread or even mozzarella sticks. Speaking as fast food connoisseurs,
we promise there are better options out there.
Five Guys is an all-American bastion of fast food, and the hot dog is a classic
American meal in its own right. So, did they nail the plain dog as best they could?
Yes. But is it enough to hold up against the rest of their menu? Not quite.
They get points for innovation, at the very least. Instead of cooking it in classic fashion
as a round slab of meat, they slice theirs down the middle before throwing it on the grill.
According to the menu, this makes for a, quote, "caramelized exterior."
We agree. The dog is definitely more flavorful. But even that slightly modified take on the
all-American staple isn't enough to make up for the fact that the bun was barely grilled,
no part of the meal was seasoned, and at the end of the day, it's still just a plain hot dog.
"Do you want one of the hot dogs? You can have
a hot-- Do you want a hot dog? Do you want a hot dog, miss?"
"No. Thank you."
Oh, Five Guys. Why must you use such cheap, sticky, neon orange-looking cheese?
This item could have been great if it weren't for the fact that
the layer of cheese is a particularly unnatural variation of American cheese.
That alone negates the other potential positives of this menu item.
Five Guys' hot dog style — sliced in half and then grilled — bodes well for a cheese dog.
Really well, in fact. The cheese melts beautifully over the dog, pooling at its
center between the halves and filling the space between hot dog and bun. It makes for a bite
that is more "hot dog and cheese sandwich" than traditional cheese dog. In execution, however,
because of the unfortunate aforementioned cheese choice, the flavor combination is
simply not worth it. The cheese dog is still an upgrade from the plain dog, but just barely.
The Five Guys veggie sandwich is downright divisive. On one side of the aisle are those
who like mushrooms. On the other are those who are staunchly anti-fungus.
When the sandwich was delivered, it was falling apart. The bottom half of the bun was so soggy
beneath the stack of vegetables that it could not hold them together. It was so unsteady that,
when we tried to pick this up to taste it, not all sandwich components made it from the table
to our mouths. The diverse creation is piled with freshly grilled onions, mushrooms, green peppers,
lettuce, and tomatoes, and we added pickles for a bit of acidic zing. Overall, the pickles ended up
dominating the flavor profile, which is probably less of a testament to the add-on and more
just an indicator of how bland the rest of the vegetables on the sandwich were.
Regardless, it was refreshing, and obviously tasted healthier than the rest of the menu.
If you're stuck at Five Guys and not craving artery-clogging fast food,
it's a fine option. But if you don't like mushrooms, skip it.
With the bacon dog, Five Guys inches ever closer to solving the issues
present in the plain dog and cheese dog. The soft hot dog meat pairs nicely with the crispy bacon,
making each bite just a little more interesting. Plus,
Five Guys seems to have mastered the bacon game. They say it is, quote, "crispy,
sweet applewood-smoked bacon," and it tastes every bit as delectable as that description sounds.
We think the peanut oil plays a large role too. The high smoke point of the
peanut oil is probably perfect for sizzling up slices of bacon,
and you can definitely detect subtle notes of peanut oil flavor on these slices.
Overall, this bacon dog trumps two out of three of its hot dog competitors.
The rule of thumb we've come to understand about Five Guys cheese is this: the more
meat you surround it with, the less offensive its flavor becomes. Perhaps that's because,
when sandwiched between a nicely grilled hot dog and absolutely incredible bacon,
the sweetness of Kraft American Cheese actually compliments well. They use the cheese to hold the
hot dog and bacon together, turning it into one cohesive unit rather than a few separate tastes.
If you're going to go with any hot dog at Five Guys, just lean into this big boy.
While it's still eclipsed by most items on the menu, it's by far the best dog option.
Just as the plain hot dog ranked last among its kind,
the plain hamburger simply could not compete with its more dressed-up brethren. Regardless,
the meat alone significantly pulls it ahead of everything thus far. It's notably superior to
the hot dog or any plain veggie or cheese creation. But even when we added pickles,
lettuce, and tomato, there wasn't enough going on to make the hamburger anything truly noteworthy.
Five Guys seems to be rolling with the at-home BBQ approach for their buns;
they could easily be pulled from a grocery store bag and we likely wouldn't know the difference.
They aren't overly seasoned or grilled in any unique way,
so when it comes to the plain entrees, there's just nothing to elevate the taste.
The meat is a different story, however. The chain describes the double-patty as two,
"fresh, hand formed patties hot off the grill."
Even plain, the burger is an enjoyable if not entirely noteworthy experience.
"I can guarantee you, that our burger well-done, is as juicy as anything you'd ever want."
One bite into this bad boy and it was clear: Five Guys knows how good its bacon is, and isn't afraid
to show it. It's a BLT, after all, with a strong emphasis on the "B." It's basically just bacon
on a bun, with a few slices of tomatoes sitting atop the crispy mound of bacon,
though we recommend adding some pickles, too. The rendition that was served to us
included just one measly piece of lettuce, more white than green,
slicked up against a generous slab of mayonnaise. Really, all you were tasting was the bacon.
This is by no means a crime. As previously observed, the Five Guys bacon
might just be the best on the market. On their menu, the chain claims that each BLT has,
quote, "six whole strips of American Smokehouse crispy bacon," and we believe them. If you're
looking for something plain, the bacon edges out the burger. Go with the BLT.
We recommend choosing the bacon over the burger, yes. But the real beauty of Five
Guys is that you don't have to choose. Their bacon burger truly is the best of both worlds,
combining four slices of the legendary bacon with two of their handmade patties.
As with any combination, the attention to detail on any one aspect of this burger
may suffer as a result of everything else going on. For example, check out
that less-than-crispy slice of bacon atop our burger. Hardly up to the Five Guys standard,
however, even a drawback like that feels small when you consider the reward of tasting Five
Guys' greatest meat options together. The only problem with this otherwise-epic masterpiece is
there's a lot of meat here, and not a lot of moisture to hold it all together.
The Oreo Cookie Pieces milkshake is exactly as advertised. At its core, it's a vanilla milkshake,
but this flavor is pretty widespread and indeed has bits of Oreo cookies sprinkled throughout.
You can actually taste intact chunks of Oreo cream in any given sip,
and while the cookie texture is harder to distinguish, its flavor dominates the shake.
We ordered our milkshake topped with whipped cream and would advise against it.
The real substance of this item is so delicious that you won't want to waste time on a generic,
sweet tuft of whipped cream before getting to the good stuff.
The only reason this milkshake didn't rank higher is that, for some, it could be a serious sweetness
overload. Plus, not everyone likes chunks in their shake, even if they are Oreo cream chunks.
Buckle up for some grade-A hypocrisy, here. After all that time spent slamming
Five Guys' choice of cheese, the cheeseburger somehow manages to land this high on the list.
Here's the thing: as discovered with the bacon cheese dog, the Kraft American goo
is actually pretty decent when sandwiched between meats.
The cheese melts onto and over the patties on either side and holds them together in a
way that other, saucier options simply could not do. Not only does this make the burger
more edible from a practical standpoint, but it also improves the flavor tenfold.
Here it is, the mother of all Five Guys burgers. Remember our qualms with the bacon
burger? It was beyond delicious, between the crispy bacon and the hand-made burger patties,
but the one thing missing was some moisture to hold it all together. Enter American cheese.
This burger is an explosion of dynamic flavor, surrounded by the cheese we love to hate. If
anything, this monstrous meaty gem is evidence that there is nothing better than doing the
basics well — except, of course, when you do all of the basics well and then combine them.
You know Five Guys is doing something right when perhaps their most iconic menu item doesn't even
come in first place. If you've never tried a Five Guys fry, drop what you're doing immediately and
go grab a bag. This all-American delicacy, which comes in an overflowing soda cup, will spill out
onto the floor of the brown paper bag every time. In fact, you know you've got fries from Five Guys
when the bottom of the bag is completely discolored and practically drenched in peanut oil.
"Now you can't have baseball without a bat, you can't have a burger without fries"
Five Guys describes their fries as, quote, "hot, fresh, boardwalk style fries, made to order
each and every time." They are cooked twice, which allows for that perfect crispy outside,
soft inside dichotomy, with overwhelming flavor profiles of salt and peanut oil.
They are as addictive as they are easy to eat and,
considering the extra-large serving size of every Five Guys fry order, they can be
a bit dangerous. If you're going to get one basic from Five Guys, start with the fries.
This bad boy is not much to look at. It's not much to think about,
either, as a peanut butter milkshake is fairly standard. But wow, is this a taste sensation.
There's more to this shake than meets the eye. Five Guys' peanut butter milkshake has a vanilla
base blended with natural, creamy peanut butter. If this all sounds fairly standard,
that's because it is. But there's a secret ingredient here that packs a real flavor punch.
In an essentially Five Guys move, channeling both simplicity and innovation,
they blend honey into this masterpiece. The honey makes for an extra sweet,
extra natural flavor that just peanut butter and vanilla alone cannot achieve.
Here you have it — the absolute best item on the illustrious Five
Guys menu. Their Cajun Style fries are the perfect combo of classic and spicy.
To construct these amazing fries, Five Guys starts with their regular, boardwalk-style method.
They are freshly cut and cooked twice with peanut oil oozing off of them. From there,
Five Guys completely packs Cajun spice onto each and every fry. But while some may say the caked-on
spice is too much, we'd argue that it is just enough. Any less, and these would taste like
a slightly upgraded classic fry. Any more, and you'd lose that incredible peanut oil under-layer.
If you don't know where to begin when ordering Five Guys, start here. Apprehensive about the
heat? You can always opt for their classic fries and get the seasoning on the side.
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