- [Original Poster] Eventually I got the point.
All the people that commented and my friend
were saying she was married and I finally had doubts.
People suggested rolling by her place at night.
But before I did that,
I wanted to have a talk with her first.
I asked her point blank
if there were any other men in her life.
She said no.
I asked why she was keeping her life secret.
And she eventually confessed
she was a little embarrassed about
dating a man 10 years her junior.
I understood this.
And she said she'd make an effort to stop hiding me.
When I told my friend, he said bullshit,
and we should still snoop on her.
He eventually found a Facebook of a friend of hers
and was able to find her husband's.
She is indeed married.
The husband is indeed in the military
and is currently at some place called Camp Foster in Japan.
We found this out two days ago
and I'm still struggling with it.
I haven't told my girlfriend I know yet.
And she spent last night at my apartment.
I'm kinda embarrassed.
I know I'm going to have to tell her eventually,
but I'm just so in love with her, like head over heels.
I don't know what to do.
- [Responder] Look, if she's willing
to cheat on her husband,
she'd be willing to cheat on you in the future.
She isn't loyal in the least bit.
And she hasn't been honest with you.
Exactly.
She'll probably do the same thing to OP in the future.
If he stays in this, or heck might just dump him
when her husband comes back,
OP needs to let her husband know about this,
if that's at all possible,
because he absolutely deserves the truth
about what she's doing,
that she's been lying behind his back like this.
Yep, came here to say this, too.
You'd be incredibly naive to think
she wouldn't do the same exact thing to you.
Do not tell her,
just dump her and leave.
Now that you know, you will still screw another man's wife.
Yeah, I agree with this.
But I would tell her that you know,
and that what she's doing is shitty
and that you didn't sign up for this.
Camp Foster is a Marine Corps base.
So the husband is probably a Marine.
Marines are particularly fond of getting violent
with the Jodies with whom their wives cheated
while they were deployed.
Be forewarned.
You found out you're the affair partner two days ago,
and you're still with her?
Grow a sack and move on.
Seven billion people in the world and you're so desperate
you want to stay with a woman
who doesn't care about our own partner?
Who, by the way, she promised to love and to hold
for as long as they both live.
There's nothing she can say to you
that she hasn't already said to her husband.
There's nothing special about your relationship.
She's a cheater and a liar, dude.
Cheaters cheat, liars lie.
Get away from that mess.
Get out of the relationship now.
Sure, it may be embarrassing to get played,
but it's worse to enable infidelity.
You can tell her you know or not,
but you need to dump her immediately.
If you're too freaking weak to be able to do it in person,
then do it over the phone or in public.
Tell her husband that she is having an affair.
You know his Facebook info, or at least your friend does.
If you keep screwing her now that you know,
you are as big a piece of crap as she is,
and you deserve to get cheated on
by every partner in the future you have
just so you will know her husband's pain.
If you keep the information from her husband,
you are also a massive piece of crap
because he has the right
to have all the relevant information
to make decisions about his own life.
You should want better for yourself.
You deserve better than her.
She clearly has no concern or respect
for you or her husband's feelings.
She even told you another hurtful lie
to cover up her infidelity.
She made you feel like you were too young for her
to cover up that she is a cheater.
And honestly, her husband deserves to know.
I would send him a private message to let him know.
I would want to know if that was my wife.