[Music]
good evening my fellow americans
you remember my anger translator luther
why
hello now i've told luther that he can
join me for this last address
but that his being on his very best
behavior is crucial to healing the
divide in this country
keep it cheer luther go against
every natural instinct in your body
since we last spoke the country has
voted for a new president
trump here we go come on
come on come on really talk about the
trump
how did this happen man forget the
[ __ ]
y'all gonna vote for the dude that's
gonna make america hate
again don't you understand this is how
the hunger games starts
no uh it's true we all have to accept
that i'm gonna have someone else calling
the shots
vladimir putin y'all you got a naked
roosky
on horseback gonna be running the show
placebo
russian [ __ ] it was a close
election but
the people have spoken yeah they voted
for hillary clinton but then this
outdated electoral college mumbo jumbo
voodoo [ __ ] i can't even stand
it's more imperative than ever that we
move on
as a country united united in the fact
that we can't [ __ ] stand each other
even as the country adopts new policies
uh
on trade immigration new policy
the only good immigrant is the smoking
hot white one who played your eyes of
speeches
i said [ __ ]
now i have greatly enjoyed my time as
your president
except when um you know um let me think
about limited when the republicans
wouldn't let me do [ __ ]
and then that one dude said i wasn't
born here and then you all elected him
so you know what didn't love that part
so much
so pretty much the beginning middle and
the end sucked
i have met with president-elect trump
and have pledged my support
in his transition he doesn't even
want the job y'all i saw it in his eyes
the dude was shook the only reason he
ran is because his factory in china
made too many red hats
i assure you that if he succeeds
we all succeed unless he succeeds with
all the [ __ ] he promised to succeed with
in that case we're [ __ ] and now
a time cherished tradition is that the
outgoing
i'll go and don't say outgoing
that's me damn it leaves the incoming
president a little
note in the desk of the oval office of
course it's completely confidential
go [ __ ] yourself until now
oh that's my bad
so all of you out there who are afraid
that your way of life is under attack
remember that progress isn't always a
straight line no because sometimes it's
a line that goes like this
and then this goes straight down for
four [ __ ] years
stay strong and never stop standing up
for what you believe in
uh yes i would like to book a four-year
stay for five at the ice hotel in sweden
please sorry five
for both i mean y'all gonna take bo make
it six
in summation thanks america
it's been real it's been good
but it ain't been real good apparently
orange is the new black
good luck with your healthcare [ __ ]
i'm out
peace
i got my eye a new [ __ ] grabber
you