Negativity in a toxic workplace is infecting you.
At least that's how I felt in my toxic job.
I distinctly remember talking to
my boss one day and saying...
"The negativity here is making me a negative person and
that's making me not like myself."
Can you relate?
I wish I had known these six simple strategies to
stay positive when you're surviving a toxic job.
If you are here to protect yourself from that toxic job vibe,
tap the like button and let's get straight into it.
The first strategy to stay positive in a
toxic work environment is to set boundaries.
A few weeks ago on my channel,
we talked about narcissistic manipulation tactics that
happen in the workplace.
And one of them that we talked about was
the complete disregard for work life boundaries.
So let's talk about what boundaries are real quick,
because they are not cute little ideas.
Work Life boundaries are the necessary parameters for
you to have positive and productive relationships,
workplace dynamics, and so on.
While some work life boundaries are external,
like the time and place you choose to do your work,
or what you choose to share about yourself at work.
Not all boundaries relate to interactions
that you're having at work.
A lot of your work life boundaries are going to be
internal; that is their emotional boundaries
and psychological boundaries.
Like how many [censored] you'll give about
that toxic coworker who's gossiping about you.
This actually brings me directly into the second tactic
to stay positive in a toxic workplace.
Remember the toxicity is not about you.
When you're working with that toxic coworker,
like Patty who's gossiping about everyone,
Nick who would rat his own mother out to the boss
if it helped advance his own career,
or Avery, who would probably
sell their soul to get that promotion.
All of that stuff has nothing to do with you.
I know that it can feel like it because
their behaviors might actually be aimed at you.
For instance, Patty is gossiping about
how much your new handbag cost.
Nick runs to your boss to tell on you for
appearing offline on Slack for more than an hour yesterday.
And Avery? Well, Avery's doing Avery things.
The consistency between each of these situations,
and any other scenario you're going to
encounter with a toxic coworker, is that they're
all just projecting their own insecurity,
their own feelings of inadequacy and their own
complete lack of competence in their own abilities on you.
Of course, it's extremely annoying and
frustrating to deal with.
Work would be so much easier if the humans
weren't humaning the way that they do.
In a toxic work environment, you need to constantly remind
yourself that the way that people treat you
is telling you how they feel about themselves, not you.
This is really important, so over on my Instagram,
I'm going to go put a little reel up with a mini affirmation
that's going to remind you of it that you can
save as a reminder, anytime that you need it.
The next strategy to stay positive in a toxic work environment
is one that even if you're not any toxic work environment,
have a pre and post work ritual.
Actually, I'm going to give you a few prompts.
So if you have a notebook and a pen handy,
or your phones Notes app, whatever works for you,
I've worked with hundreds of toxic job survivors,
I have spoken with 1000s of you and
there is a commonality to how the day starts and ends
when you are in a toxic work environment.
And I was totally guilty of this too.
When I was in my toxic job the day begins with dread.
[sobbing] "I don't want to go to work."
And ends feeling angry and ranty and maybe even
closing out the day with a post work trauma dump.
I personally used to enjoy mine with a glass of wine,
but we're gonna circle back on that in just a minute.
I know that not everyone hearing this is going to like it
but it's the truth: You're setting the tone for your own day.
Shifting your energy can be remarkably easy.
Let me ask you a question and I want you to
write down whatever comes to mind first,
What activity makes you feel good?
It could be listening to music, meditating,
discussing Tinx's latest podcasts with your best friends,
having a dance party to Taylor Swift or
repeating affirmations into the mirror. S
tart with figuring out your go to mood boosters.
Now, which of these can you easily unreliably do in the morning?
Like can you multitask with affirmations and Taylor Swift?
While you're brushing your teeth in the morning
get intentional about cultivating the best possible energy
as you begin your day. Next,
are there any that you can sprinkle throughout your day?
Like a quick visual meditation about a protective gold bubble
before you walk into a meeting with your toxic boss.
And the final ritual to implement,
and I think this is the most important one,
especially when you're activating a job search
to escape your toxic job...
[Beeping} Interrupting you really quickly to tell you about
my new workshop, WTF just happened?
Unpacking your toxic job to break the toxic job cycle.
It's never too early or too late to get over your toxic job.
If you'd like to sign up I know the seats are going to go quickly.
You can go to toxic obrehab.com.
Back to our regularly scheduled programming...
How can you reset your energy afterward?
This should involve letting go of the bad energy
and boosting the good vibes. For example,
going for a walk in nature can elevate both your
serotonin and your dopamine, the happy chemicals in your brain.
And can help reduce stress and anxiety.
And I'm a hippie, so of course I love
the role that water can play here.
Like an after work swim or shower where you can literally
wash away the toxic vibes of the day.
Magic!
Of course, this reset ritual is going to be unique to you,
no matter what this needs to be based on things that
make you feel good no matter what they are with a tiny caveat.
And that caveat is actually the next strategy
to stay positive in a toxic work environment.
Choose your coping mechanisms.
As I mentioned, when I was in my toxic job,
I decompressed at the end of the day with
a glass of wine and a rant session.
And I know I'm not the only one to do this.
But the thing is, those coping mechanisms make it worse.
Here's why.
When we look at coping mechanisms like complaining,
having a drink or entering sloths mode,
and scrolling Tik Tok, or watching Netflix mindlessly,
they make you feel better, but only temporarily.
These activities are flooding your brain with dopamine
dealing cheap and easy hit after hit.
But here's the problem.
Alcohol is a depressant.
Research shows a correlation between screentime and depression,
hope you guys are in audio only listening mode.
And that complaining actually makes you feel worse.
This is why I want you to be so intentional about
the coping mechanisms that you cultivate,
you can elevate yourself and your mood by elevating your actions.
And there is a ton of positive coping mechanisms
that you can try on and see if they fit.
Exercise,talking and laughing with a friend,
a mindfulness practice like journaling or meditation,
or even just reading. These will help you decrease stress
and also help you improve your mood and even your confidence,
which is so important when you're in a toxic work environment.
You know, I'm a realist.
And I do want to acknowledge when I say this,
that sometimes we do just need a rant or whatever.
Sometimes that is part of your process for
feeling your feelings, and it's valid.
But overall, we can choose the coping mechanisms
that we choose to practice.
And we can make a decision to create ones that are
going to better support us.
Which brings me to a really important point.
And if you've been hanging with me for a while,
you've probably already noticed it.
But I think it's a conversation that we just need to have,
especially when we think about it in terms of
staying positive in a toxic work environment,
choose positive inputs.
When you're in a negative work environment or a toxic job,
you're in those negative low vibrations all day long.
And that's draining AF.
It's also very easy to loiter in those bad vibes.
Frankly, in my YouTube backhand, I can see it.
And this has actually been one of the catalysts
for a very intentional shift on my part on my channel
and in all the content I create.
So much of what is out there about toxic jobs
and toxic work environments is
commentary that is overwhelmingly negative.
And I know listening to reaction videos about
what awful thing a CEO just did,
or even watching my toxic job series gives you affirmation
and that drama in the conversations is dealing you
one of those dopamine hits.
But it's cultivating that negativity not just at work,
it's cultivating in your life.
And of course, this goes beyond just YouTube.
It's the shows we watch the books,
we read the podcast that we listen to,
the conversations that we have.
You get to choose the energy that you live in.
And when we're not intentional about what energy
we are choosing to live in, especially when we're living
in negative energy eight hours or more a day.
It's very easy for it to permeate our entire lives.
Do not let it.
Find positive content, find inspirational podcasts,
watch a funny show, find positive inputs that
genuinely elevate your mood, your outlook and your life.
And I really hope that my channel, especially going forward,
is a space that you can count on for that
and that you subscribe and hang with me for
the vibes as much as the actual content.
Speaking of elevating vibes, the next way to
stay positive in a toxic work environment is something
that you can do every single day.
And not only is it going to make you more positive
it will increase your happiness baseline and improve your resilience.
Ya know, an essential thing when
you're in a toxic work environment...
Gratitude. I've said it before and I'll say it again,
gratitude changed my life.
This is one practice that I actually had when
I was in my toxic job. And I attribute it to not
being completely destroyed by that toxic work environment.
Take time every day to find at least one positive thing
that happened, something that you're grateful for.
And it doesn't have to be something big and life changing.
It can be something really simple.
Like maybe you just had the best lavender latte of your life
or your best friend and said something that
made you live until your stomach hurt.
Find the good in every day,
especially when you're dealing with negativity and tension.
This is a game changer.
In fact, I want you to go and watch this video right now
so you can dig into it more.
But before you go if this video helped you
give it a thumbs up! It really helps my channel,
makes you my favorite career bestie,
win win situation.
As always my friend thank you so much for watching.
I will see you in the next video.
Bye for now!