- Hey ya playa. Just like the video title says,
I'm gonna explain to you guys the whole story
as to why me and my first girlfriend broke up.
What I really want to share with you guys is
what I learned from this relationship
and what I could've done to make it work.
So, get ready because this story
is gonna be a doozy!
♪ This is Josh Speaks ♪
♪ Watch me, Josh, speak ♪
- Before we get into any details,
I have a video explaining how me
and my first girlfriend got together,
what I said to her in the beginning,
and how we started going out, so make sure to
watch that one before this.
Moving forward now, so, where we last left off,
I told you guys how I asked her out
and we started dating.
From there, it was on me now to call her
and ask her to hang out.
Being a teenager in high school,
I didn't really know what a proper date was.
So I just asked her to hang out,
and we decided to go get pizza.
Looking back, I think I put so much emphasis
on doing something really cool and fun
when all I really had to do was
ask her to hang out so we could talk more.
And that seems to be something
a lot of people overlook:
the simple element of hanging out and talking.
It goes a long way when you're just starting
to get to know someone.
Luckily, she didn't live too far away from me
so I was able to walk to her house.
We hung out, we got pizza, and we talked.
Of course, the things that were running through my mind
were "when should I hold her hand"
and "when should I kiss her"?
On that first date, I did neither of those things.
But I did end up giving her a hug
which I thought was progress.
Neither of us had really been in a relationship before
so a lot of this was new to us,
and I think what she was expecting was
for me to also try to take the lead
so that she didn't have to worry about it so much.
And I think from my perspective, what I thought
was that things were just going to fall into place,
that we somehow were going to be able to know
what we should do and everything was going to be good.
But it wasn't.
I mean, sure being in a relationship with her,
hanging out was a lot of fun, but
I was nervous the whole time.
I didn't really know what was the right step to take.
And this went on for a while.
I was too nervous to hold her hand
and too nervous to kiss her,
so I think she ended up talking to her friends
and complaining to them saying "I don't get it.
Why isn't he making a move?"
I kept telling myself over and over
"Okay, I'll just wait for the right moment to do it"
but the problem was that I had to create the right moment.
Eventually, one of her friends pulled me to side and said
"Hey, why aren't you treating her like your girlfriend?
You're treating her like she's just another friend
by standing around her and not really doing anything."
I told her that I was waiting for the right moment,
and every single day after that,
I would see her in the morning before school started
and I didn't do anything; I didn't kiss her hello,
I just kinda waved and said hi.
Keep in mind though that every single person
works differently.
Some people take longer to move into that phase,
and some people are ready to do it
right from the first date.
And I think she was waiting for me
to demonstrate what it meant to be her boyfriend.
And that's when I decided
okay the next time I walk her home, I'm gonna kiss her.
This wasn't my first kiss, but it was my first kiss
with an actual girlfriend, so I felt like things
were going to be a little bit different.
I walked her home and we both stood
in front of her door, knowing and waiting
for me to make that move.
She looked at me, I looked at her,
we both kinda paused and fell silent.
And then I went forward and I kissed her.
It was a short kiss and nothing special,
but this was monumental for me.
I was making that step forward
and being her actual boyfriend now.
Despite all that, I was still too scared
to make a move in school.
I felt like people would be watching me
and judge me somehow.
There was even one time I invited her
to hang out with me and my friends,
and I spent the entire time just
talking to my friends.
Looking back at that moment, I didn't realize
she felt completely ignored.
Me and my friends were just talking about
wrestling and other stupid stuff,
and she just kinda sat there.
There was even one point where I tried to
hold her hand while we were walking,
and I ended up grabbing it awkwardly,
so instead of fixing it, I figured
"Oh, I'm holding her hand out!
Let's just keep it in this awkward holding position."
Plus, I didn't know what to do if I needed both my hands
so I just kinda held onto her hand and figured,
"Well, we linked up. Now let's not break it!"
All I really had to do was let go and fix it
but because I was so nervous about doing it
I figured "Hey, I don't wanna mess it up now."
But this is where I think the line
was finally drawn for her.
It was the last day of school and we both had
a half day, so I decided to go with her to
her house to hang out.
Her parents were there when we arrived,
but they eventually left, leaving a
sixteen and a fifteen year old alone in a house.
You might be thinking, "Hey, this is the part
of the story where Josh makes his move!"
You are wrong.
Once again, I was so, incredibly nervous
about doing anything.
Don't get me wrong, I wanted to kiss her,
I wanted to hold her, I wanted to see
where things would go, but I was just too scared.
We were sitting on the couch watching a movie
when her parents left and we ended up sitting
through three more movies when they eventually
came back.
And within that entire time, we sat
next to each other on the couch and
I didn't do anything; I didn't put my arm around her,
I didn't try to kiss her, nothing.
I think eventually through the second
or third movie, she had just given up.
She knew that I wasn't going to make the first move,
she knew that this wasn't going to happen,
and I think she was starting to doubt
the relationship.
At the end of the day when I left,
I gave her a kiss goodbye and I went home.
Later on in that week, I was hanging out
with my friends when I got a phone call from her.
I put down my game cube controller, I walked into
the other room, and I asked her what was up.
And that's when she told me that
she wasn't really feeling the relationship anymore,
and she thought it was best if we broke up.
My initial reaction was shock, and I didn't think
to talk to her about it, so I just said,
"Oh, okay. If you feel that way, then I think
that's probably best."
And of course, I was hurt, but I felt like
I couldn't show that in front of my friends,
so I just went back to playing video games.
And what makes this story even more interesting
is that the day that I walked up to her
and started talking to her, one of her friends
also liked her too but he was too scared
to make a move.
So, when we were finally single, he said,
"Hey, this is my opportunity!"
He asked her out, and they started going out.
I wasn't jealous or angry, I understood what happened.
I didn't really give my all to the relationship,
and she eventually lost interest.
What do you guys think, though?
Have you ever been in a situation like that before
where your boyfriend or girlfriend broke up
with you because they just lost interest?
Leave your comments dow below and let me know.
You would think this is the end of the story though,
but no, no, no, no.
It goes on way further, but I'm saving all that
for another video.
This was in high school, but what happened
next carried on for years and years
on end, and it was completely crazy.
If you're new to the channel,
make sure to hit the subscribe button below.
I put out a new video every Tuesday and Friday,
sharing thoughts, tips, and ideas
teaching you how to be your best self.
And, to enjoy this story, check out
the playlist down below with the
rest of my stories, I share a new one every Friday.
And make sure to follow me over on Snapchat @TheJoshSpeaks.
I share a different story every single morning,
we talk, we share quotes, we have fun.
As always guys, love and peace.