hi and welcome to this edition of Gainesville counseling's video weblog today we're going
to talk about addiction addiction is defined as continuing to use a substance or an engage in an
activity despite continuing negative consequences and in order to escape from negative feeling
States the biggest thing about an addiction is that whole clause about continuing to do it even
though it's causing you problems if it's causing problems in your relationship and you continue to
do it we need to look at whether the relationship means that much or your addiction means more if
it's causing problem your work it causes you to lose a job if you're getting legal charges if
it's causing problems in your finances and you're continuing to do it you have to ask yourself why
generally it's because it solves a problem or it doesn't solve it but it masks a problem it makes
you feel better for a while it gives you hope and in the case of gambling it may give you hope that
you can get enough money to get out of debt and quit the job that you hate etc in the case of
alcohol and drugs it may just numb the pain for a little while the key is to figuring out why
you're doing it and some other alternatives to that behavior that aren't as detrimental we need
to also look at the damage that's been caused while you're in your addiction because that's
something that's gonna have to be addressed if you got two duis your wife left you and your house is
in foreclosure yeah the road to recovery will be easy but you need to take the first step and the
first step is stop being using or doing whatever you were doing and getting into a rhythm where
you're doing what we say in recovery is the next right thing it doesn't always feel good recover is
not about doing what feels best right now recovery is about doing what feels best in the long term
is this going to get you where you want to be six months from now in our intensive outpatient
groups we talk about different skills and tools we talk about coping skills we talk about anger
management we talk about your irrational thoughts I have found after working with addicts for the
past 15 years that most addicts have a lot of irrational thoughts mole hills become mountains
worries become the sky is falling everything is about them if something if the sky is blue
they did it if it's raining well that's their fault too so we need to look at what you can
and cannot control and how to change and control those things you can and how you can be okay about
not having control with some things some things you don't have control of other people you know
you may have ruined your relationship with your wife you cannot make her come back you cannot
make her love you again you can do the next right thing for you and if she chooses to come back you
can but admitting that you cannot control her in the 12-step programs they talk about powerlessness
and admitting that you're powerless over your addiction you cannot control that one drink and
it's the road to never Neverland you need to make sure that you understand it's not that you have
no control of your life it's not an excuse to use it's saying that if you make the choices that lead
you to start using you're probably not going to be able to stop you are perfectly able to drive
by the bar you are perfectly able to go into the grocery store and not buy liquor you are perfectly
able to do a lot of things you are able to handle stress without using believe it or not and it's
I will tell you that from the very beginning early recover is not pleasant but as you go through it
and you're realizing that you've gotten one more day clean and sober and you've gotten through and
over hurdles that you never would have tried in the past you'll realize how strong you really are
but it's important when you first decide that hey I need help to realize that addiction was
your way of surviving up until now now it was not the best choice but it was the only thing
that helped you to survive until a man and it's up to you and your counselor and your peers to
help you figure out what your triggers are and how to deal with those in a more productive way
so you're not hurting yourself addiction can be dealt with and relapse is not necessarily always
a part of recovery you are able to find recovery now the thing I do want you to also realize is
there's a difference between being clean and being sober clean means you don't have any drugs in your
system or you're not going to the gambling tables or whatever sober is a whole lifestyle change it
means not being stuck in immediate gratification it means trying to do the right thing not always
the thing that feels the best it means being open and honest and having hope that things can get
better and having faith in yourself and other people and the courage to stand up for yourself
and to stand up for others now that sounds very hokey and all that kind of stuff but if you
don't have honesty hope faith and courage you're gonna be kind of sunk those that's the foundation
of recovery otherwise you're constantly going to be running from anxiety and depression and
maybe other people this is what we need to focus on so in groups whether you're an outpatient or
intensive outpatient or you're trying to work through workbooks and the 12 steps on your
own what you need to figure out is where do you want to be two years from now how does that look
different if you've had periods of sobriety how does that look different than the way your life
looks right now what were you doing differently so you didn't need to use if you want to stay
clean and sober make a list of all the reasons you want to stay clean and sober but don't forget to
make a list of all the reasons you don't there's a reason you haven't stopped and those reasons
are the ones that are going to undermine you if you don't address them admitting that it makes
you feel good and finding something else that makes you feel good is important admitting that
maybe you liked the taste of alcohol okay fine um we've got to figure out something else to do that
doesn't trigger you but you need to figure out what the rewards are from your use we don't do
things that don't have your words dogs don't cats don't humans don't it's just a fact of life you
do things that are rewarding and avoid things that are punishing so if you're continuing to
use that's clearly more rewarding than being sober and we need to figure out why and tilt the balance
that's what is covered in groups now there are some groups that you can go to and sit around
in a circle for three hours and talk about your feelings those are our groups because I have found
from the feedback I've gotten from my patients that yeah that's good sometimes but every day
day in and day out not so much so we will work on developing skills practicing them applying them
to your life and then talking about them in the next section in the next session about whether
they worked and how that how well they worked the goal is to help you not need a higher level of
care if you can stay emotionally stable if you can stay clear-headed and make good decisions
if you can stay physically stable and maintain a clean and sober safe living environment then you
don't need to go to residential treatment but if you can't maintain all four of those things
there's a good chance that you may need to be referred to residential treatment some people
have the luxury of being able to decide whether they want to go but the majority of people by
the time they get into an addiction this in-depth the courts involved so figure out whether you want
to intervene now or try your luck thank you for watching and learning a little bit about addiction
and we will see you at the next installment of Gainesville counseling's web blog thank you