*Music plays* *Happy doggo intensifies*
*Music plays*
I hate this. >:(
*Slam!*
The sun will kill you! That's a fact. (The sun is a deadly laser)
Scientific fact. There's nothing coming out of the Sun except molten death.
Absolutely purely. Chica get some water! Chica get some water bah-bee
That's a good girl! :D
All the sun does is suck every ounce of water out of your entire body. If you were out in the sun for too long
you would die. That's just a fact. It's full of radiation. It literally blasts your DNA in half, and I ain't about that shit.
I want to live, but...
we got ways to beat the heat other than just fixing the air-conditioner. I didn't get strings
*Sigh*
*The majestic Markimoo mating call*
What just moved? You okay? Barrel you all right?
*Markismooch*
Here's the situation.
Sun!!!
No good! >:(
So we got to find a way to beat this sun and we've already solved half the problem. We got a van, it's got shade,
it's got air conditioning, and
It's got a convenient power hookup.
This bad boy is practically a mobile generator and if we fix it up with the right things then we'll have afjsdsua sdm
*Mark viciously erases mini whiteboard*
Shit that was an eraser. No, that's just a magnet I'm good, I'm not an idiot.
Heh!
So what do I need? I need a few simple things. I need Chica. I need some good old-fashioned water
Just just a bit of oxygen not a lot, but just a bit and I need a way to play some video games.
Because if I don't have video games,
*Gibberish*
♫ I don't know how to spell ♫
Video games. *Mark pops teh bubble*
There we go that's a G. And in order to get video games, what do you need? Sound it out! A Tee Vee!
Yes very good. So when you want to play video games.
You need the TV and what else? Chica what else? What else do we need?
*Slaps the newspaper's A$$* Pop up there.
Dog. Dog? I got that check that off the list. And also you need fuel.
Uuf.
You need...
fuel. Fuel stands for ..
Fridge Under Electric Load
Video games stands for...
Very In Debt Eek Oh God A Man Eating Spider
TV stands for...
Television (Wow, good one Mark)
So now that we've gone over the acronyms *Gibberish*. Now we know what we need to do.
But there's one thing that we can't get right now and that's internet....
So we got to make do with old school. Back when I was a kid,
We ba ba back when I was a kid we didn't even have the internet for our consoles. Consoles didn't even have an Internet pook up
hook up. *SUCH GIBBERISH* Pook up?
Consoles didn't even have the Jackie port you slam into the... *Wut...*
(Uh, Mark what are you doing?)
you know. So we need to get a fridge and where do we get a fridge?
(Dora The Explorer flashbacks intensify)
I don't either so we're gonna ask. Hi-ho silver, AWAY! Oh shit. Sorry, lady didn't mean to scare ya
Ah bicyclists. I'm gonna follow them. (White van following people on the street not suspicious at all)
I wonder if they're gonna lead me back to their bike nest. You know, bikers are the most lethal of all predators. (The more you know!)
(Intense stepping) (Roblox death sound)
Number one
Number four. Number, whatever that number is whew we gotta get a fridge and in order to get a fridge
We either would go to a store and buy a mini fridge which is bullshit or
(Mark proceeds to initiate spontaneous sex with the whiteboard)
or..Twitter.
I dropped my pen
There's someone that has a fridge and I'm willing to pay for it
Paid for the van, I'll pay for a fridge. If it's got some kind of like wood finish a barrel fridge in a barrel, ah so good
Gotta get a barrel for the barrel. Can I buy a barrel at Cracker Barrel for the barrel. I dunno. Anyway, gotta Tweet
the LA area have a MINI fridge for sale?
Will come to you
What could go wrong here? Send pics and a bope! And tweeted.
So now this should be fine right? My fans know that I don't goof them
so the responses must be
Absolutely 100% serious. "Is it for freezing body parts?"
Why?!
(You're avoiding the question Mark)
It's a mini fridge. What kind of body parts would I be freezing in a mini fridge? It's not a mini freezer
"What the fresh Hell are you doing?"
I'm buying a mini fridge!
"First a van, now a fridge?? You're a MAD MAN!" "Truly the scariest thing about Mark's return from hiatus"
I just want a fridge.
Everything's a conspiracy theory-
(Ded)
(Slam!)
People have trust issues. I don't know why.
Oh well, we got other options.
And we can let that brew for a bit so if they come back to me and get their heads out of their asses maybe I'll get a fri...
Siri: I don't know what that means. If you like, I can search the web for "We got other options and we can let the roo for a bit so if they come back to me"
(Siri wtf)
Ah tits!
Ah, now what we're looking; I've got a response that seems legit: "Hey Mark
I do have a mini-fridge that is in good working condition, and I do live in LA". It looks...
well loved. Ooh, it's like it... does it come with a stand look at that, alright. Okay. I'm gonna send them a message
Hey, that looks pretty good. I'm sending you a video so you know it's me and not someone crazy. (You sure you aren't crazy Mark?)
That didn't sound suspicious at all did it?
Yeah, probably fine. We're about 45 minutes away
Leaving...[Chica pants for real]...right now. Hell yeah.
All right, so we're about five minutes away
Not only do they have a fridge, but they also got a TV
That's gonna be perfect because it's a combo TV VCR and everybody knows that my favorite
movie is Flubber on VCR because when I was a kid I watched it so much that the VCR at the VH...
VH the VHS bb-8 AAA the VHS tape broke, and then I never got to see it again [Chica pwns at panting]
So after I go to Cracker Barrel I'm watching Flubber or on the way there
I'm watching Flubber and trying to drive at the same time. I'm thinking I can mount the TV like right here.
(No don't do it.)
That'll probably be good.
(Mark I'm pretty sure that would be illegal.)
I think we're here. Oh, oh hi
Hello approach the conspicuous suspicious white van
How you doing? Iliana: Oh Chica! Mark: Yeah Chica's here
Hello, what's your name? Iliana: Iliana. Mark: It's nice to meet you
Iliana: Nice to meet you Mark. Mark: Yeah, it's Iliana. Iliana: Hello! Mark: Yeah how you doin'? Iliana: Great.
Mark: So you have a mini-fridge and a TV? Iliana: Mmhmm. You want to take Chica? Mark: Of course!
(Double slam!)
Thank you so much. Everyone else didn't believe us. Iliana: Yeah, I figured. Mark: I don't know why. Iliana: because the Internet's full of...y'know the internet
Mark: conspiracy theorists!
Hello, hi, my name is Mark. Person: Hey Mark nice to meet you man. [general greetings]
Christian nice to meet you. Mark: this is my buddy
So thanks so much for responding, like this is supercool. Oh is that the...
Person: That's it right there. Mark: it's beautiful.
This is like, when we were thinking, we thought we were going to have to go to like thrift stores or whatever, but...oh, it's perfect!
Person: it's working OK
I heard you have guavas. Person: yeah we have a guava for you.
they're ready for eating. they're ready to eat.
and they have more vitamin c than an orange.
Mark: Oh, I believe you. No, I won't take all of them
I'll just take er, just a couple. A few.
If a hundred is OK for both of us? Iliana: yeah sure, more than enough.
Mark: I believe you.
Iliana: you want help taking them out?
Mark: Oh you're so strong!
This is serendipity to be sure. Person: Yeah, there you go nutrients on the road. Thank you man appreciate it
Diagonally oh yeah, oh, that's oh, that's money right there. Oh?
Can you hand me that TV please?
Oh! Oh! It's beautiful!
[Iliana laughs]
It's so perfect
Iliana: I'm so glad we kept it. Mark: So perfect! Does the VHS work?
Iliana: I believe so.
Mark: Your belief is all I need! [Iliana giggling like a true fangirl] Yes. Iliana: If it doesn't, uhm...
Darkiplier: We'll come find you!
Ah it's good to get goin. Holy shit look at this
Look at - sorry - look at this. Chica look at this
Bam! Ugh!
Smells like guava and pumpkin back here. Chica who's a good girl. Who's a good girl? Now where was that hah?
Come on back here give me a hand with this.
Yee
These are mounted on something, I don't know what
And
There's some grip there's some grip.
Ah cock ass!
Ah! Oh!
I'm an engineer. I should be able to figure this out, right
[Chica pants like a baws]
That's not gonna do anything, ah! I've got a big brain yes I do
I've got a big brain it is true. Ooh, Nellie.
Like unless we like flipped, I don't think this is going to go anywhere.
Yeah! As my great-grandpapi once said
Good enough, let's get a beer. (Your great-grandpapi was such a wise man)
Oh, it's so hot under here. Ah my hand is melting ah it's so hot
Why's it so hot? What do I have huh? I just touched something goopy. I don't like that
Here we go okay. Got it. Oh. Thanks for the help. Turn that on
oooh
OhwahahaoO!O!"£££$£$
I'm fine. Don't worry about me. Oh oh
Never considered the fact that there might not be enough power from
(Chica pants in godlike fashion)
(Chica's godly panting must have restored the TV's power to it's former glory.)
Well alright then
Look who's got a TV
Yeah
That's creepy as hell..
Hop back up where it's not so deathly. We did what we came out to do. We got a fridge, we got a TV
We're well on our way to turning this into a liveable situation
so that we don't have to be in the horrible outside [enter Darkiplier] where the Sun will kill you! cause it will! I promise you
Ow! Just scraped my head on that! So we got as you can see from a very...
SP0oky TV!??!?!?
From a very distinct list here. We've got..ow did it again...We got
Dog....TV...F.U.E.L.
All that's left is the video games
But we need to solve a bigger power problem that I don't think we're gonna get to today
I think we need to take our victories where it counts, but it's a pretty good day. So thank you so much for j--
thank you so much for joining me and
As always see you in the next video.
Buh-Bye!