and some of you have thought of suicide
some of you are in the darkest of
darkest valleys and I was there once too
I was eight years old depressed nine
years old even darker at 10 years old I
came to the edge
and I thought to myself there is no hope
at age ten tried to drown myself in six
inches of 15 centimeters of water you
know I told my dad I just wanted to
relax but really I wanted to in my life
I had enough the first two times I
rolled over I was trying to work out how
much error holding my lungs before other
did out the third time
in my mind knowing that I wanted to get
out of here because of the bullying in
my life because I was going to be a
burden to my parents and had nothing to
look forward to I realized at that
moment that if I actually went through
with committing suicide
I would leave a greater burden for my
parents than they already had so when I
saw in my mind my mom and my dad and my
brother crying at my grave if I went
through with that one thought saved
encouragement you can save a person's
life
[Music]
you may have arms and legs but unless
you know three things number one who are
you what your value is number two what
is your purpose here in life and number
three what is your destiny when you're
done here if you don't know the answers
of any of those three questions you're
more disabled than I
if I gave you a billion dollars would
you be happy if you gave me a billion
dollars I'd be very happy but then if my
mom dies tonight am I happy No
[Music]
life is worth living when you find
purpose Nick I don't know my purpose is
I don't know my parents want me to do
this my teachers want me to do that my
friends think that I should do this and
I don't know what to do and you're torn
man you don't know what to do you have
to make important decisions man you
don't know what to do who do you believe
follow your heart if that's who you want
to be
if that's what you want to do in life
and walk too one day at a time you got
to come to the truth
of knowing who you are and why you're
here William Barclay he said the
greatest two days in anyone's life the
day you were born and the day you knew
why I know that there are a billion
people going hungry today I know that
this year a million people will commit
suicide it's one every forty seconds
I know today they're 120 million slaves
and I've met sex slaves
[Music]
so many people tease each other you know
you're too short you're too tall you
look whatever a different hair and all
that it doesn't matter see thing is when
you're in school when you're growing up
in life it actually sort of matters to
people how you look and then he matters
to you because it matters to others
why why does it matter how you look
because if they don't like you then who
will if they don't accept you then who
will I know so many teenagers who look
themselves in the mirror and wish that
they had a different buddy I want to ask
you what are you going to believe are
you going to believe in yourself you're
going to believe everybody else's
judgment on you are you going to believe
people when they say that you're a
failure no one really likes you normally
cares about you that's what this world
is I want to look like her own life if I
was taller shorter smarter more popular
whatever you want it's not enough and
the fear that we have is that we're
going to be alone that we're not good
enough and you know we have to change
ourselves you know so many people put me
down and say Nick you look too weird and
no one's really a friend and you can't
do this and you can't do that and I
couldn't change anything I don't like
just fixing my hair one day and
everything's fine it's not like you know
just whatever I couldn't change my
circumstance
I couldn't just one day wake up and say
hey give me arms and legs I need arms
legs but it was so hard because people
put me down and I started believing that
I was not good enough I started
believing that I was a failure they'll
never ever be somebody who people would
like or people would accept and it was
so hard man I thought to myself you know
I can't go on to go onto a soccer field
like everybody else and I can't ride my
bike and I can't skateboard and all
these sort of things and I started
getting depressed I thought what kind of
purpose do I have to live I mean do you
are you just here to live to die I mean
is there not a purpose for me is there
not a purpose in life
and I had questions and no answers and
asked my mom and dad why did this happen
I asked doctors why did this happen they
don't know there are some things in life
that are out of your control that you
can't change and you're going to live
with the choice that we have though is
either to give up or keep on going every
single human being has value and my
values are determined on how I look or
what job I have or where I'm from where
I was born how much money all that stuff
nothing and it's funny how the friends
around you sort of determine who you are
you change yourself you come to school
and everybody swore around me in high
school so I started swearing why because
it's the cool thing to do everybody
swears so I don't want to be left out
and I want to be accepted so I started
swearing you go to a party everybody's
drinking so you drink wine whatever
ebuddy else around me is doing a big
deal and you start losing yourself and
you start putting your security in
temporary things you start putting your
happiness in things that weren't last
you can get drunk or you like but in the
morning you're going to be sober with a
headache with the same problems
[Music]
Nick you're not good enough Nick just
give up Nick you're never gonna get a
job you won't get married you can't even
hold your wife's hand what kind of a
father are you gonna be if you can't
even pick up your kids when they're
crying
[Music]
but I tell you there are some times in
life where you fall down and you feel
like you don't have the strength to get
back up because I tell you I'm down here
face down and I have no arms no legs it
should be impossible for me to get back
up but it's not you see I will try 100
times to get up and if I fail 100 times
if I fail and I give up do you think
that I'm ever going to get up
no but if I fail I try again and again
and again for as long as I try there's
ways that chance of getting up does that
make sense and it's not the end until
you've given up and just the fact that
you're here should persuade you that you
have another chance to get back up that
we have a choice I did to be angry for
what we don't have or be thankful for
what we do have you have a choice every
day you come to school to either tease
somebody gossip about somebody or you
can go up to them and encourage them
there's still hope I'm not here today to
tell you that I understand your pain I
don't know how it feels to be abused I
don't know how it feels to feel quote
fat and you've got an eating disorder
I don't know how it feels to have a
broken home but I just want you to know
that it's not the end it matters how
you're going to finish
are you gonna finish strong
at age 10 I actually tried to commit
suicide by trying to drown myself in my
bathtub and the only reason I decided to
stay was because I didn't want to leave
my loved ones with that pain so I
decided to give my broken pieces a
chance man am I glad that I'm still here
today I still have no arms or legs but
everything's changed when I'm 24 years
old five six years ago I was in
California and I never met anybody else
like me when I was 10 years old I wish I
would have met somebody like me never
did didn't get that married but at 24 in
California sort of little boy with no
arms and no legs 19 months old just like
me and knew he was going to be bullied I
knew who was going to go through
depression I knew he would feel alone I
knew that he would get worried if he's
ever going to have a girlfriend and so
on and so I got the father to bring him
up on stage in front of 2,000 people and
everyone was crying
and it was a materialization of when you
don't get a miracle you can be a miracle
for someone else think of the three
biggest discourages in your life they're
not your biggest discourages you are but
I hope you are inspired to know that if
I can dream big then so can you
that honor was find your peace and
you'll make your walls doors
you