( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: HEY, WELCOME BACK,
EVERYBODY!
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YOU ARE IN FOR SUCH A TREAT, BECAUSE
MY GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ACTRESS AND COMEDIAN YOU KNOW FROM
"SHRILL," "I FEEL PRETTY," AND "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW," AIDY BRYANT.
♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )
>> HI!
OH, WOW.
>> Stephen: HELLO, AIDY BRYANT.
>> HELLO.
>> Stephen: NICE TO SEE YOU.
>> SO NICE TO BE SEEN.
>> Stephen: I HAVE VERY HAPPY FEELINGS WHEN I SEE YOU, BECAUSE
THE LAST TIME I SAW YOU-- >> WOW.
>> Stephen: THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED.
JIM?
>> AND THE EMMY FOR VARIETY SPECIAL LIVE GOES TO STEPHEN
COLBERT'S "ELECTION NIGHT 2020."
♪ ♪ ♪ >> ( BLEEP ).
>> YES!
( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: THANK YOU.
WOW.
I HAVEN'T MET SOME OF THESE PEOPLE BEFORE.
I HOPE THAT WAS ANY WAY NEAR AS FUN FOR YOU AS IT WAS FOR ME,
BECAUSE I WILL ALWAYS THINK OF YOU FONDLY NOW.
>> OH, WOW I WISH I BROUGHT YOU ANYTHING TONIGHT.
I DIDN'T.
NO, I MEAN, IT IS REALLY FUN.
BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU'RE GIVING SOMEONE SOMETHING THAT THEY
MAYBE ARE EXCITED TO HAVE.
>> Stephen: IT'S GREAT TO PRESENT.
YOU'RE ALWAYS GOING TO BE A HAPPY MEMORY.
>> TOTALLY, BUT I'M SO WORRIED ABOUT RUINING SOMEONE'S SPECIAL
MOMENT BY-- I WAS SCARED I WAS GOING TO BE LIKE, STE-FON
COPETE."
>> Stephen: STILL AN HONOR.
>> GOOD, I'M GLAD.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON.
WE BOTH STARTED OUT AT SECOND CITY.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: IN CHICAGO.
( APPLAUSE ) WHAT WERE YOUR--
>> KROWFD ALUMS.
>> Stephen: MOST OF THE AUDIENCE IS FROM CHICAGO.
>> WOW.
>> Stephen: WHAT WAS YOUR EXPERIENCE LIKE THERE?
BECAUSEESH HAS THEIR OWN SECOND CITY EXPERIENCE.
IT'S BEEN AROUND 60-PLUS YEARS.
>> I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT FOR ME IT WAS SUCH HEAVY
PARTYING, I SHOULD HAVE DIED.
( LAUGHTER ) IT'S AMAZING I'M NOT DEAD.
AND PARTIALLY BECAUSE IT WAS JUST, LIKE, A PATTERN OF, LIKE,
YOU KNOW, YOU WOULD DO YOUR SHOWS ON THE STAGE, AND THEN YOU
WOULD GO OUT TO A BAR -- >> Stephen: BECAUSE YOU DID
THE IMPROV SET REALLY LATE.
>> SO LATE.
>> Stephen: AND YOU'RE SO JACKED UP FROM IMPROV.
>> SO JACKED FROM IMPROV.
>> Stephen: THE ADRENALINE OF IT.
>> OF COURSE, BUT IT'S HUMILIATING TO ADMIT TO COOL
PEOPLE.
( LAUGHTER ) AND THEN, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE
JACKED, AND THEN YOU'RE LIKE I'M GOING TO GO TO THE BAR AND
CELEBRATE HOW I PLAYED A LADY IN A BIG HAT TONIGHT, OR WHATEVER.
( LAUGHTER ) AND THEN, BY THE TIME IT'S,
LIKE, 4:00 IN THE MORNING, YOU'RE LIKE, WELL, WE'VE GOT TO
GO OUT TO EAT, YOU KNOW.
>> Stephen: SURE, WEINER CIRCLE.
>> OF COURSE.
AND THEN, BASICALLY, YOU'RE DOING THAT EVERY DAY.
WHICH IS NOT OKAY.
AND I'VE TRIED TO, LIKE, RETURN AND GO-- LIKE, I DID A CHARITY
SHOW, AND I WENT BACK WITH SOME OTHER OLD ALUMS.
>> Stephen: WITH THE YOUNG KIDS WHO ARE STILL UP ON STAGE
THERE.
>> EXACTLY, EXACTLY.
I TRIED TO GO TO THE BARS WITH THEM.
LAST TIME, I CRANK SO MUCH THEY BLACKED OUT.
>> Stephen: WOW.
>> SCARY.
>> Stephen: YEAH.
( LAUGHTER ) THEN I WOKE UP IN MY HOTEL, AND
I REALIZED, OH, I MUST HAVE SEEN THE TAMALE BAN BECAUSE I WAS
BARFING UP TAMALES.
( LAUGHTER ) AND HOW AMAZING.
I WAS LIKE A LITTLE DRUNK DETECTIVE.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU FOR BEING SO OPEN AND VULNERABLE
WITH US.
>> I LOVE TO BE BEAUTIFUL ON CAMERA.
I'M KNOWN FOR THIS.
>> Stephen: SECOND CITY PEOPLE ARE KNOWN FOR THEIR DIGNITY
ABOVE ALL ELSE.
>> ABSOLUTELY.
>> Stephen: I UNDERSTAND YOU DID SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED
AFTER I LEFT THERE-- I WAS IN TOUR CO, FOR MANY YEARS, BUT WE
DIDN'T HAVE THE CRUISES BACK THEN.
YOU ALL WOULD DO THE SECOND CITY CRUISE.
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN, THEY WOULD LODE YOU ON TO A CARNIVAL CRUISE
BOAT, RIGHT?
>> IT WAS NORWEGIAN.
WE DIDN'T MAKE IT UP TO CARNIVAL.
I DON'T KNOW, BASICALLY, IT WAS A FOUR-MONTH CONTRACT, SO YOU
LIVE ON THE BOAT.
>> Stephen: FOR FOUR MONTHS!
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: IS THAT A PUNISHMENT TO BE ON A BOAT FOR
FOUR MONTHS, OR IS IT THAT WAS GREAT?
WAS IT YAY!
>> I WAS DEFINITELY IN A ROOM WITH NO WINDOWS THAT WAS ABOUT
TWO FEET WIDE, BUT I WAS BEING PAID, SO FOR ME I WAS LIKE,s,
THIS ROCKS."
>> Stephen: I FORGOT, WHEN YOU'RE YOUNG, THEY KEPT YOU
HUNGRY THERE.
>> TOTALLY.
WE DIDN'T HAVE MUCH TO DO.
WE JUST DID A COUPLE OF SHOWS DURING THE WEEK, AND THEN THEY
DID HAVE US TEACH WORKSHOPS.
SO WE WOULD, LIKE, TEACH IMPROV TO KIDS.
AND I WASN'T VERY GOOD AT THAT.
SO I ALWAYS TRIED TO TEACH THE, LIKE, HISTORY OF SECOND CITY
WORKSHOP.
AND IT WAS MOSTLY SHOWING PEOPLE ON THE BOAT CLIPS OF YOU.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: FROM SECOND CITY?
>> YES.
>> Stephen: LIKE THE SHOW?
>> LIKE OLD SECOND CITY CLIPS OF YOU SINGING WITH PAUL DINELO,
AND YOUR OLD SECOND CITY PALS.
>> Stephen: THOSE VIDEOS ARE TERRIBLE.
>> THE QUALITY'S NOT GOOD.
AND THEN YOU PUT THEM IN A BALLROOM ON A SHIP, WHICH IS--
AND PEOPLE ARE GOING, "WHAT'S GOING ON?"
( LAUGHTER ) BUT THEN FOR THE REST OF THE
WEEK, PEOPLE WOULD BE LIKE, "SO YOU KNOW HIM?"
I WOULD SAY, "NO, I LIVE ON THE SHIP."
YOU KNOW.
( LAUGHTER ) I --
>> Stephen: I KNOW NO ONE.
>> NOW I THINK IT'S GOOD BECAUSE IF THEY WERE EVER TO TAKE ME TO
COURT OR SOMETHING, I WOULD GO, I DO KIND OF KNOW HIM.
>> Stephen: HOW LONG DID YOU LIVE IN CHICAGO?
>> SEVEN YEARS.
>> Stephen: WHAT YEARS WERE THOSE?
>> WE'RE TALKING 2005 PLUS TO 7.
>> Stephen: SURE.
>> AROUND -- >> Stephen: THAT'S TOO HIGH.
DON'T-- WE'LL DO THE REST.
WE'LL HAVE THE TEAM DO THE REST OF THAT WORK.
>> I GOT HIRED TO "S.N.L." IN 2012.
>> Stephen: OKAY, YEAH.
>> SO AROUND THERE.
>> Stephen: THAT RESTAURANT THEY WORKED AT FOR FIVE YEARS
WAS STILL THERE.
YOU'RE GOING TO SKUZ ZY.
IT WAS AN ITALIAN RESTAURANT WITH A GIANT TOMATO OUT FRONT.
DID YOU WAIT?
>> I SHOULD HAVE BEEN WAITING TABLES, BUT INSTEAD I WAS
WORKING ON A BARBER SHOP ANSWERING PHONES AND FOLDING
TOWELS, SWEEPING UP HAIR.
SO MUCH HAIR.
>> Stephen: I CAN'T IMAGINE THAT PAYS VERY WELL.
>> NO, I WOULDN'T SAY THAT IT DID, NO.
( LAUGHTER ) NO, BUT I DON'T KNOW-- I CAN'T
SAY-- THEY WERE PRETTY FLEXIBLE WILL WITH OUR HOURS.
SO WHEN I WOULD SAY, "I CAN ONLY WORK THREE HOURS BECAUSE I NEED
TO GET IN A VAN TO GO TO INDIANA TO PERFORM IMPROV FOR PEOPLE
EATING CHICKEN TENDERS," THEY WOULD SAY, "SURE."
>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK, BUT WHEN WE COME
BACK I WILL ASK AIDY ABOUT HOW SHE GOT HER JOB AT "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE."
STICK AROUND.