- Taylor, Katie, Britney, Beyonce,
what are you hiding from us?
- Let's talk about that.
(groovy theme music)
Good mythical morning.
- I love strong, independent, powerful lady pop stars,
their music is the soundtrack to my daily tooth brushing
and smoothie making and Rhett's daily pilates routine.
- Yes, but sometimes powerful women can be
a little threatening to some people,
and you can count on the equation that
the internet plus time plus powerful women
equals creative conspiracy theories,
and today we are gonna go through some of the best.
- It's time to ask,
should we be leery of these celebrity conspiracy theories?
- Okay, first up,
whether you think Taylor Swift is an angel or the devil,
one thing's for sure, she's a Satanist clone.
- Really?
- More specifically Taylor Swift is a clone
of Zeena LaVey, former high priestess of the Church of Satan
this is not Xena warrior princess,
it's Zeena satanic priestess, there's a distinction.
Now here is Zeena LaVey,
- Oh. - Look at that pic.
- [Link] I see the Taylor Swiftiness immediately.
- It's only beginning Link.
Zeena was born in 1963, and she operated
as a high priestess of the Church of Satan
from 1985 to 1990, and here's a pic of Taylor Swift,
born, quotes, in 1989,
who has operated as the high priestess
of the Church of Catchy Pop Songs for the last decade.
Now look at these two pictures Link.
- Well, they're, you know,
they both have their hand on their face,
and their faces look very similar.
- [Rhett] Hand on the cheek, that's a clone.
- Really, that's how you tell?
- Listen, I'm going deeper Link.
- Go deeper. - Look at this
photo of Zeena with a cat.
- [Link] Okay, that's a lion.
- And look at this photo of Taylor with a cat.
Woah, hold on!
Look, they both look the same direction
when they have cats.
- In their laps.
- They both love cats, clones love cats,
case should be closed, but I'm gonna keep going.
- Let's keep the door open
for a little bit longer, shall we?
- Here's Zeena on a show,
talking, watch this.
- [Host] What is a destruction ritual?
- Well we believe in vengeance, we don't believe
in turning the other cheek.
You keep turning the other cheek and you run out of cheeks.
We feel that if you are wronged in some way
that you take it out with the person responsible.
- Even the tone of voice,
even the tone of voice is very similar to Taylor Swift.
Well it's actually the same as Taylor Swift,
because she's a clone.
Zeena's all about vengeance,
who else is all about vengeance?
- Taylor Swift. - Every other Taylor Swift
song is about getting vengeance on a horrible boyfriend.
She ain't turning no other cheeks for John Mayer.
I could just walk out right now,
and my case would be closed, but,
- Let's leave it open a little bit longer.
- Taylor is practically screaming,
I'm a clone satanic priestess in all of her music videos.
In the Bad Blood music video, she shows herself
being created in a machine, i.e. cloned, hello!
In her Style music video, she holds a fractured mirror
which represents the all-seeing eye of Satan,
and also shows lightning over her face,
which is widely used in the music industry
to indicate satanic allegiance, hello!
In her Blank Space music video, she stabs a cake
and blood comes out.
That's not a normal cake, that's a Satan cake, hello!
- Hi.
- Still not convinced?
Listen to what happens when you play Out of the Woods
backwards. (snaps fingers)
(backward song plays)
- All the single ladies, all the single ladies.
- No, I'm an evil lady, I'm an evil lady.
- Okay, you're right, I'm sorry.
- Cut,
I'm an evil lady.
She's saying it.
She's an evil lady.
- Can we close this one?
- We can close the case, sorry to disappoint
you Taylor fans, or should I say you Zeena fans.
- Hello,
hello to you too.
Okay, that was intense, man.
- Yeah it was, it's all true.
- I got one for you.
Of course you know JonBenet Ramsey,
the child beauty pageant queen who was found
tragically murdered in her home in Boulder, Colorado,
on the day after Christmas in 1996,
ever since then she's been popping up
in the news, people like to talk about her
because the case was not only sensational and tragic,
but it was never solved.
But what if JonBenet Ramsey never died?
What if JonBenet Ramsey became the sensational
and scandalous platinum pop artist Katy Perry?
Well you don't have to ask what if anymore,
because she is.
She is Katy Perry.
Take a look at this side by side photo,
JonBenet in her prime, Katy Perry in her present state,
same person.
- [Rhett] She lost the bangs, but everything else
is pretty much the same.
Now the nose is a little bit different.
- Nobody in Hollywood has the same nose they were born with.
You might ask why would a six-year-old be enthralled
into faking her own death,
and why would she go along with that?
Who's behind this?
Big media is behind this.
- Oh, big media.
- As we all know big media needs salacious crime stories,
like JonBenet Ramsey case, to make tons of money
with the constant coverage, which they did over time.
But why would JonBenet go along with this?
Well, because in exchange for her sacrifice
they promised her a new identity.
Any identity you want JonBenet,
what would you like to choose?
Well maybe a famous pop star.
She gets to wear glitter and make videos
in Candy Land all day,
JonBenet, you shall become Katy Perry.
Which is obviously a fake name.
- Right, nobody would have that name accidentally.
- Katy Perry, that's like Jane Woman.
You know, it's not that much different.
Need more evidence? - Yes.
- Look at the eyebrows.
- Oooh, okay, yeah, this is the only thing
on the face that you cannot reshape,
so that's solid, it's a solid point.
- Yes, okay, look at the parents.
These are JonBenet's parents.
- [Rhett] Okay, I remember them.
- And these are Katy Perry's parents.
- [Rhett] Oh goodness.
- I mean, seriously, it's not that hard
to shave your head and put on some funky glasses.
- Hey, I could do that.
- You should do that.
- No I will not do that. - Actually, you shouldn't
do that, but I mean the resemblances are uncanny.
- [Rhett] Yeah, that's definitely the same two people.
- Need any more information to be convinced?
Well, I'ma turn to my man, VK33 on YouTube,
he's got all the info.
- [VK33] I've noticed Katy and JonBenet
have a lot of eerily similar outfits.
JonBenet in this pink hat, - Pink hat.
- Katy Perry in this pink hat. - Oh gosh.
- Same pink hat. - Even though she was older
in this pic than the previous one.
- What are the chances? - Well there's more.
- [VK33] Katy's grandmother tweeted.
JonBenet with the crown,
Katy Perry also has pics in crowns.
- It's so obvious.
- Pink hat, pink hat, crown, crown.
Another case closed.
- Okay, Taylor Swift and Katy Perry aren't the only
pop starlets who have lied to all of us, I hate to say it,
but Queen Bey herself has been lying to all of us.
- Nuh uh.
- Now listen, everybody knows Beyonce is currently
pregnant with twins, she published this whole photo set
that we enjoyed together in our office.
- We did an Instagram story on it.
- And she performed at the Grammys,
I still can't get the image of her pregnant belly
and her glistening bosom out of my head.
But, - It was shiny.
- She's very open about her pregnancy this time,
but she was very private the first time she was pregnant,
and that's because, conspiracy drumroll please.
- There isn't one of those, there's no drumroll
for conspiracies. - Maybe next time.
She was never pregnant with Blue Ivy.
She used a surrogate mother, what is the evidence?
Well it all started when a rumor,
this rumor started when Beyonce appeared
on an Australian talk show in the fall of 2011,
let's watch that clip.
- How you doing?
- I'm good.
It's a beautiful baby bump, no wonder Beyonce,
- Watch this. - Is blooming,
this really is Destiny's Child.
- What? - What?
Yes I did see that.
- Now listen, - Destiny's Child look like
a pillow stuffed up under there.
- Exactly, if there's a baby in that womb,
it's injured at this point.
- It's crumpled, look at the crumpling.
- That my friends is a prosthetic
belly - Baby bump.
- Made to look like she was pregnant,
and listen, what did Beyonce say to this?
She responded with, it was the fabric that folded,
does fabric not fold, oh my gosh, so stupid.
But seriously, does fabric not fold?
My fabric guy handles my fabric, I'm genuinely asking.
- You or Beyonce?
- Beyonce denies this, but listen,
in the only other thing she did, there was this
documentary made about her two years later,
and it shows some grainy footage,
but the bottom line is,
- So there's no ungrainy footage besides that
of her being bona fide pregnant?
- No, but the bottom line is Beyonce can have her baby
however she wants to, with a surrogate,
without a surrogate, it is her prerogative,
she's still the Queen, we just don't want
the all powerful Beyhive to come after us,
so she can do whatever she wants.
Please, spare us Beyhive. - We love you Beyonce.
You got 99 problems, but we shouldn't be one.
Of course, you watch Britney Ever After on Lifetime.
- No, I did not.
- Well it was horrible, Britney Jean deserves better.
What could be better, well how about
an intricate political conspiracy?
Remember in 2007, Britney shaved off her hair,
and said she was tired of having things
plugged into her head, well, - Who isn't?
- Turns out that the thing on the other end of the plug
was President George W. Bush.
That's right, Britney's meltdowns were all
a big cover up created by the Bush administration
in an attempt to turn the public's attention away
from the mistakes that they were making.
Note the correlations.
In April 2006, Bush's ratings were at an all-time low,
38%, what happens at the same time?
Britney is seen driving with her baby in her lap.
- Yep, I remember, I forgot Bush was president that day.
- That is not legal.
November 2006, midterm elections where Republicans
could potentially lose many seats is happening,
Britney announces her split from K-Fed.
- I was so sad I forgot to vote.
This is all coming back to me.
- Right, and then in February of 2007,
Bush had to acknowledge the reformation of Al Qaeda,
which was bad for him because he promised to eliminate them.
What does Britney do at basically the exact same time?
That's when she shaves her head.
- I always knew that Al Qaeda was behind that.
What was that?
- Mic, I dropped,
I hurt my hand a little bit actually.
- Case closed!
- No, not case closed, if you need more information,
listen to Britney herself.
- Honestly, I think we should just trust our president
in every decision that he makes
and we should just support that, you know.
Be faithful in what happens.
- [Reporter] Do you trust this president?
- Yes, I do.
- Oh gosh, she seems like she's got something
plugged in the back of her head telling her to do that.
That's Bush, she's a Bush puppet.
- Case closed.
- And finally, a female pop star conspiracy theory
that hits especially close to home for us,
this one's very simple and very obvious,
Avril Lavigne is Stevie Levine.
She's so lazy, she didn't even change her last name.
- So lazy,
thank you for liking, commenting, and subscribing.
- You know what time it is.
- Hi I'm Nicole.
- And I'm Danielle.
- [Together] And we're from Winnipeg, Manitoba,
and it's to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
- If Taylor Swift is a clone, well then we're authors.
Wait, we are authors, and you can preorder our book
at BookofMythicality.com, and you should.
- Click through to Good Mythical More as well,
we're gonna play Just Dance 2017.
- Don't Google That.
Whatever you do, do not Google
goliath bird-eating tarantula.
- Uh uh. - Don't do it,
don't Google it. - Don't do it.
I'm not doing it.
- [Rhett] Click on the left to watch
our show after the show, Good Mythical More.
- [Link] Click on the right to watch
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- [Rhett] And click the circular channel icon to subscribe.
- [Link] Thanks for being your mythical best.