TIM YOUNG'S BIRTHDAY TONIGHT, LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN.
> THANK YOU, GUYS.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
♪ ---- NO WAIT, STOP, STOP, I'M SORRY, IF WE'RE GOING TO SING
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WHAT I CONSIDER THE GREATEST GUITAR
PLAYER WHO EVER PLAYED IN LATE NIGHT, I WANT TO SEE TIM YOUNG
ABSOLUTELY SHREDDING THROUGH HAPPY BIRTHDAY, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT?
OKAY, LET'S START AGAIN, HERE WE GO.
STEVE, LEAD US IN.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR TIM.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.
♪ >> Reggie: LET YOUR FREAK FLAG
FLY.
>> James: LET'S GO.
♪.
>> LET'S DO IT.
[BLEEP] >> James: GO, GUYS.
LET'S GO!
I'M 11, GUYS.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) OH MY GOD.
I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW WHERE I WENT THERE.
I FELT LIKE I WENT TO LIKE 1982.
WHOOO!
OH MY GOD.
>> Reggie: WE TRASHED THIS PLACE, LOOK AT THIS.
>> James: LOOK AT THIS, LOOK AT THAT, WE SMASHED THE PLACE
UP.
WE DIDN'T EVEN BREAK THE MUG.
>> Reggie: BUT WE DID CRUSH IT.
>> James: DIDN'T EVEN BREAK THE MUG.
(LAUGHTER).
>> James: THAT'S HOW ROCK 'N' ROLL WE ARE.
WE DON'T THROW TRK V'S OUT OF HOTEL ROOM WINDOWS, YOU KNOW
WHAT WE DO WE GO-- OKAY PUT IT BACK NOW, PUT IT BACK NOW CUZ WE
GOT TO GET INTO SOME HARD HITTING POLITICAL TAKEDOWN.
>> THE ONLY THING THAT IS BREAKING AROUND HERE, THE ONLY
THING THAT'S BREAKING AROUND HERE.
>> James: DO IT.
>> THE FRIGGING NEWS.
>> James: IT'S THE NEWS THIS AFTERNOON, A FEDERAL
APPEALS COURT GRANTED FORMER PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP'S
LAST-DITCH REQUEST TO PAUSE THE RELEASE OF DOCUMENTS TO THE
HOUSE JANUARY 6 COMMITTEE.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO TURN OVER THE DOCUMENTS BY 6:00 TOMORROW.
JUST THE PERFECTLY NORMAL ACTIONS OF A MAN WITH NOTHING TO
HIDE.
"CAN I LOOK AT THAT?" "NO!"
FLOG, NO NEED TO SEE IT IT I UNDERSTAND HE PAUSED THE RELEASE
OF DOCUMENTS THIS IS A CONGRESSIONAL INVESTIGATION,
THIS ISN'T ROSS AND RACHEL ON A BREAK.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY THINK THEY'RE GOING TO FIND IN THOSE
DOCUMENTS.
"HERE'S A BUNCH OF TAKE-OUT MENUS FROM K.F.C., A PICTURE OF
PAMELA ANDERSON CUT OUT OF A MAGAZINE, AND A HANDWRITTEN NOTE
THAT SAYS 'YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER'S NAME IS TIFFANY'."
SPEAKING OF THE JANUARY 6 INRECTION-- THAT'S DIFFICULT.
INSURRECTION-- DOES EVERYONE REMEMBER THE SO-CALLED "Q-ANON
SHAMAN?" THE GUY WHO WORE A HEADDRESS AND
POSED SHIRTLESS ON THE SENATE FLOOR?
THIS GUY?
WELL, THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT IS ASKING FOR HIM TO BE SENTENCED
TO MORE THAN FOUR YEARS IN JAIL.
IT'S THE LONGEST SENTENCE PROSECUTORS HAVE ASKED FOR ANY
CAPITOL INSURRECTION DEFENDANT SO FAR.
I SUPPORT A FOUR-YEAR PRISON SENTENCE FOR ANY ADULT WEARING A
COSTUME.
THEY'RE ASKING FOR THREE YEARS FOR THE RIOT, AND THEN AN EXTRA
YEAR BECAUSE HE USED TO BE IN AN IMPROV GROUP.
HE MAY BE GOING TO PRISON FOR YEARS.
EEN WORSE, THEY'RE ALSO MAKING A MOVIE ABOUT ALL OF THIS...
"THE SHAMAN-SHANK REDEMPTION."
NO, NO, NO, DO NOT-- TOM, YOU LED THAT CLAP.
IS THAT YOUR JOKE WITHIN IT'S NOT MY JOKE BUT I HAD TO STAND
UP FOR IT.
>> James: I'M UP FOR STANDING UP FOR THE JOKE.
I JUST DON'T THINK IT IS APPLAUSE WORTHY AND I CERTAINLY
DON'T THINK IT'S YOU GOING YES!
AND THIS IS A FASCINATING NEW FINDING, ACCORDING TO
RESEARCHERS, GOING TO SLEEP AT 10 P.M. COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE, I
MEAN IT WON'T, ARE YOU GOING TO DIE EVENTUALLY.
NONE OF US GET OUT-- ST MISLEADING THAT IT WILL SAVE
YOUR LIFE, NOTHING CAN, WE ARE ALL RIGHT NOW CLOSER TO DEATH
THAN WE WERE WHEN WE WERE CELEBRATING TIM'S BIRTHDAY.
THAT'S A FACT.
SO WHAT IS IS APPARENTLY GOING TO BED BETWEEN 10 AND 11 P.M.
LOWERS THE RISK OF HEART DISEASE COMPARED TO ANY OTHER TIME OF
NIGHT.
YEAH, SO START GOING TO BED AT 10:00 SO YOU CAN LIVE A LOCK,
HEALTHYLIFE AS A BORING ASS LOSER.
WHEN IS THE LAST TIME WERE YOU WERE IN BED BY 10?
>> I DON'T KNOW, I GUESS MAYBE A COUPLE OF YEARS AGO.
>> James: WHAT TIME DO YOU NORMALLY FALL ASLEEP.
>> I GO TO BED LIKE AROUND, LIKE 1 OR 2.
BUT LAST NIGHT I WENT TO BED AT 3 AND A HALF BECAUSE I HAD TO
DELIVER MILK.
(LAUGHTER).
>> James: AND THIS IS THE KUN UNDRUM.
YOU RIGHT NOW AT HOME ARE FACING A KUN UP-- KUN UNDRUM WE ALL
FACE AS WHAT I CONSIDER A KARY FRIEND OF REGGIE, A DEAR AND
CHOSE FRIEND, BUT WHEN YOU ARE A DEAR AND CLOSE FRIEND OF REGGIE,
AND IT PROBABLY HAPPENS EVERY FOUR OR FIVE DAYS, YOU ARE FACED
WITH A POINT WHERE YOU THINK DO I FOLLOW UP WITH A QUESTION OR
DO I JUST LET IT GO.
WHY WERE YOU DELIVERING MILK?
>> BECAUSE D O.J. A CAT NEEDED MILK.
>> James: NO, HANG ON, SHUT UP, IS DELIVERING MILK SOME KIND
OF YEUF MISM NOW?
>> NO, SHE WAS MAKING, SHE WAS MAKING HOT CHOCOLATE VZ THIS HAS
GOT TO STOP, THIS D O.J. A CAT THING, THIS D O.J. A CAT THING
IS GETTING OUT OF CONTROL.
NOW YOU HAVE BEEN DEADLY SERIOUS NOW.
>> I AM, YEAH.
>> James: DOJA CAT SENT YOU A MESSAGE AT 3:30 THIS MORNING.
>> YEAH.
>> James: SAYING I IMMEDIATE SOME MILK.
>> Reggie: YEAH, SHE WAS DESCRIBING, SHE HAD HOT
CHOCOLATE IN FRANCE AND LOVED IT BECAUSE IT WAS VERY THICK AND
RICH AND SHE JUST LOVED THAT.
AND THEN SHE WAS MAKING HOT CHOCOLATE WHILE WE WERE FACE
TIMING.
AND THEN SHE IS LIKE OH MY GOSH, I COULDN'T HAVE ANY MILK.
AND THEN I WAS LIKE WELL, I GUESS I BETTER GET SOME MILKMENT
AND SHE'S LIKE OKAY.
SO I WENT TO THE GROCERY-- .
>> James: SO I'M LITTLED THAT YOU HAD SEX LAST NIGHT.
(APPLAUSE) -- KSH.
>> OH, GOD, I DID NOT KNOW THAT, NO, NO, WE'RE JUST FRIENDS.
>> James: YEAH, YEAH, SOUNDS LIKE IT IT.
HANG ON, WHAT WAS THIS, TOM, YOU DID THIS, WHAT HAPPENED?
>> I JUST WANT IT TO DONE FIRM THAT REGGIE'S STORY IS TRUE
BECAUSE TWO HOURS AGO DOJA CAT POSTED ON INSTAGRAM I'VE BEEN
[BLEEP] IN-- ALL DAY, PLEASE HELP ME.
(APPLAUSE).
>> James: I LOVE IT.
I'M ALL IN ON IT.
I'M IN ON IT, I'M GLAD SHE'S TASTING WHAT I CONSIDER THE
HOTTEST-- THAT I'VE EVER SEEN.
AND DID EVERYBODY SEE THIS?
TODAY IS SINGLE'S DAY, THAT STARTED IN CHINA AND SPREADING
ACROSS THE GLOBE WHERE UNATTACHED PEOPLE TREAT
THEMSELVE PRESENT, BUY YOUR SELF CHOCOLATE AND FLOWER, THAT WILL
SHOW VANESSA THAT YOU ARE OVER HER.
SO TONIGHT THAT SECOND SET OF YOU TENS ILS IN YOUR POSTMATES
DELIVERY ISN'T A GRIM REMINDER THAT ARE YOU ALONE, IT IT IS A
SINGLE'S DAY PRESENT.
I KNOW SOMEBODY WHO JUST GOT THEIR LAST EVERY SINGLE'S DAY
PRESENT, LAST ONE, FRIEND OF MINE GOT SOME MILL-- MILK.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH AN GREW-- ANDREW GARFIELD AND JAMIE
DORNAN, EVERYBODY.