I'm gonna cover all of that in this video.
Hi, I'm Rebecca Zung.
I'm an attorney, also a narcissist negotiation expert.
I do everything on this channel to make sure that
you feel like you are super powerful and
can break free from the chains that bind you,
that make you feel paralyzed in those relationships with narcissists,
whether it's a personal relationship, a business relationship,
whatever it is that is making you feel
like you are under that weight of a relationship with a narcissist,
that's what I do, I help you.
I've helped millions of people go from lives of drama, trauma and chaos,
to step into lives of freedom, possibility and purpose.
I've written two best-selling books and
I wanna help you too.
So, if you haven't subscribed to this channel,
make sure that you do that.
I upload brand new videos every single day,
I'm here every day, creating lots of resources for you, totally free.
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Let's talk about when a narcissist will actually leave you,
I know you're, like, over here hoping, right?
Or maybe you're, like, worried, I don't know,
but, when will they actually leave you?
Let's talk about why they're in relationship with you in the first place,
because that's the whole point of it.
They attach themselves to you,
not because you have so little value,
even though they're devaluing you the whole entire time,
they really attach themselves to you
because you have so much value,
they want to suck as much value out of you as they possibly can,
they're almost like leaches or vampires,
sucking that out of you.
They want that narcissistic supply and
if you wanna know more about narcissistic supply,
you can check out my video on that.
They have this endless need to feed,
this thing inside of them, this beast inside of them,
they have this emptiness inside of them that will never be fed,
it's like a black hole that is bottomless and
they want you to feed it,
you probably, when you first got into a relationship with them,
wanted to feed it too,
you didn't realize it was a bottomless pit
that can never be fed.
It's a one way directional spigot,
it will never be two ways and
they somehow always figure out a way
to get that spigot going their direction and
never the other direction.
Once you're no longer fueling that and
they realize that you're shutting that off that source,
then they won't want you anymore.
If you're no longer a good source of supply,
they won't want to be in relationship with you anymore.
So, if you start to stand up for yourself more,
or whatever that was they were receiving from you,
if that supply source is starting to shut down,
then they no longer wanna be in relationship with you.
So if you start to set boundaries,
or you start to shut off that money source,
or you start to shut off whatever source of supply was
that they were getting from you,
then they're going to want to shut off relationship with you.
Let me tell you, your value to them is in direct relationship with,
like, the ratio is directly related to how much they're getting from you.
I mean, it's a very sort of transactional relationship,
but it's almost like, mathematically,
like, they get a thousand out of you,
you're gonna get like a little teeny little thing.
In other words, as long as they're getting supply,
as long they're getting something,
then they'll come back,
but if they're not getting anything,
then they will not be in relationship with you and
once they don't feel like they're getting what they want,
then they're gone and they're gone with nothing,
No feelings whatsoever.
I mean, whatever it was that you gave them,
there'll be no sense whatsoever of thanking,
acknowledgment, feeling of gratitude, nothing.
There will be no remorse, no apology,
no sense of empathy for whatever it was that you gave them,
it will be discard, gone, whatever.
I wanna go through some of the signs you might start to see,
that they may be starting to be done,
so that you can start to see some of that.
But, they might start feeling distant from you,
you might start to sense they're always in a bad mood with you.
With the narcissist,
you start to see that a lot anyway during the devalue phase.
But during the devalue phase, they usually are hot and cold,
hot and cold, hot and cold,
When they're starting to go into the discard phase,
it's just always cold, always cold, always cold,
always distant, always distant,
you start to see they just never care what you think,
they're just always gone,
they're just always taking advantage,
they're not in any sort of caring at all or worried.
Usually if you start to pull back from them at all,
like where they start to feel you're gonna maybe step back,
then they start to pull in again, love bomb you, future fake you,
do what they need to do to pull you again you back in,
you don't see that anymore,
they don't really care,
or they might start accusing you of doing things they're doing.
If they're cheating on you, or they're doing things,
they might start to accuse you of that
so that they're sort of preempting those things,
so that when the time comes,
that they are getting out of the relationship,
they wanna be ahead of that,
“Well, you were cheating first”, or something like that,
to make sure that it's sort of tit for tat,
that sort of thing.
And let me tell you, it'll be the best thing that ever happens,
so, should you be worried if this person is about to discard you?
It's probably gonna be the best thing that ever happened.
But, you do want to prepare yourself,
so if you think that this is coming,
you do wanna prepare yourself,
you wanna make sure you have your documentation in check,
you do wanna make sure you have
everything you need lined up financially,
you do wanna make sure you have a stash of cash,
you do wanna make sure you have a place to go,
a place to live, if this is a divorce situation,
if it's a business situation, a business partnership,
make sure that you have a succession plan in place.
You do wanna stay two steps ahead of them
if you see that this is coming and get a plan in place.
If you do think that it's a divorce situation,
make sure you watch my video,
“Before you divorce a narcissist… Watch this”.
If you are dealing with this and you're managing this,
I have a whole video series on self-care to deal with narcissists,
definitely check that out.
And the best thing you can do for yourself is just move on.
If you are getting ready to negotiate with a narcissist,
make sure you grab my free “Crush my negotiation” prep worksheet,
at winmynegotiation.com.
Make sure you grab that and
join my free private Facebook group,
“Narcissist Negotiators with Rebecca Zung”.
Make sure that you get the help and support you need,
I do have a partnership with BetterHelp.com,
you can get that therapy and support if you need it.
So, if you haven't subscribed to this channel,
make sure you do that now.
Subscribe, hit that notification bell,
make sure you remember that
today is a great day to start negotiating your best life.
Remember the only win if you give in, okay?
So I will see all of you guys in the next video!