Shit.
No EDNA. I don’t think so.
IS THAT DUDE DEAD?
I’M SORRY I DON’T HAVE THE ABILITY TO MODULATE THE LEVEL OF MY VOICE...
AND THAT’S KIND OF MAKING ME SORT OF A DICK RIGHT NOW ISN’T IT?
I’LL JUST...
I’LL JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP NOW.
Your friend... he was very courageous.
Yeah... no one could rock a thong like Ruprecht.
That’s not what I- We know what you meant.
We... we’re very sorry.
Right. Sorry. Yeah.
Look I think you can appreciate I above all people love a good wake, but maybe we should
beat feat before any other freakishly big monsters get a craving for speedo flavored
twinks.
Yeah... your right.
All right cool well let’s go.
I think we’re going to stay.
Ruprecht should be buried, he would have liked that.
He would hate to have his skin ruined by the sun.
I’m pretty sure Ruprecht would have wanted his friends to survive beyond his untimely
demise don’t you?
We can handle ourselves.
Thank you very much for your concern.
Okay cool whatever.
Those knights happen to mention where they were going to look next for the holy hand canon?
They said something about a Cafe or Coffee Shop or something directly west through the
hills.
The grid was 872.5 by 471.2
Right.
Well... good luck, wherever you end up out here.
I suppose you’re coming?
WELL I... Of course you are.
Because what else do we fucking need.
RIGHT.
Do we have any shovels?
Yeah I think we have some with the luggage...
I’M SORRY I COULDN’T HELP WITH THE DIGGING.
I DON’T...
HAVE HANDS.
It’s okay.
Thanks for lighting the fire.
HEAD DON’T MENTION IT.
What’s your friend's name?
Don’t think we caught it the first time around.
OH I WONDER WHY THAT IS.
You did threaten to kill us.
Multiple times.
IT WAS MY SACRED DUTY.
That’s what you’re going with?
AND YOU GUYS WERE MAD DICKS.
HEY DON’T GO ASSUMING GENDER.
HAH!
GOT YOU.
MY NAME IS EDWARD.
... so you’re... Ed the head?
... I didn’t realize that until just now.
Heh, that’s just fucking precious.
Well thank you for killing that deathclaw for us Edward.
LIGHTING THINGS ON FIRE IS KIND OF "MY BAG".
Why are you even here?
BECAUSE...
WELL...
I GOT BORED.
So you figured you’d just... come see what we were up to?
I have, like, one job.
Asking one question to a bunch of milk toast white bread mother fuckers that just show
up and answer one riddle.
What if they get the riddle right?
I tell them to seek out the bovine six.
And if they get it wrong.
I incinerate their asses.
Right... so what are they usually looking for?
That’s not my department.
What do you mean?
I have one riddle, one answer.
That’s it.
It’s what I do, it’s what I’ve always done.
He knows what I’m talking about.
What is he talking about?
Right, can’t tell me.
I have an idea.
Why don’t you ask them what they’re doing out here.
I can’t really remember.
We were sent on our quest by our lord to search for something.
Some kind of...
I don’t remember.
It was us five squires and our knights.
I don’t actually know how long we’ve been out here.
I don’t think we always dressed like this either.
And I don’t think we used to talk like this...
Wait... squires... that’s not quite right is it... we’re not squires... scribes.
We’re... with the Brotherhood.
The knights.... that’s our Paladin detail....
I think.
Right Sam?
Sam...
Jonesy?
Yeah...
What... what the fuck, man?
Whoah... what are we... god what are we wearing?
I don’t...
I don’t know man.
I think I’ve been manscaping.
I’ve... been waxing my legs.
Yeah... they look real nice though.
Oh stop.
I think you lost us guys.
I’m starting to remember.
It’s this place.
We were sent here to look for something.
We found it digging through some old pre-war records.
Yeah... the archive was corrupt.
Just fragments of journal entries and small bits of audio logs.
So many fucking audio logs.
Something in the logs led us here...
I don’t remember what though.
I don’t remember.
Neither do I. I... I don’t think I remember either.
The longer you stay... the more you’re going to forget.
Do you... remember what it was you were here to look for?
That’s the only thing I actually remember.
...The Glow.
Www.dollarshaveclub.com/psycho.
That’s right, I’m contractually obligated to say www.dollarshaveclub.com/psycho at least twice during this plug.
Wasn't that fun? It sure was! Glad we get to share this experience together.
What experience? The brand experience. What brand? Dollar Shave Club of course.
And if you guys use that URL I just mentioned twice, these guys are going to give you the first month razors for free.
Just pay shipping. After that it’s only a few bucks a month.
Not only did these guys throw us cash to make the show happen, they are offering all of you a month of your razor subscription for free.
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I’m kidding on that last bit.
Or am I?
I am.
Or not. Your call.
Well hi! you like cool shit? Fuck yeah you do!
Well guess what? We're doing the Extra Life charity stream-a-thon on November 26th.
And if you donate money to the cause, we're going to hook you the fuck up!
Because we're partnering with Devolver Digital and other companies to get you epic loot to people who donate to our team.
We have limited edition soundtracks, exclusive art prints, CD keys, peripherals and swag coming out of our freaking ears.
So here's the deal, we need you to head over to this link and throw down for the cause.
Either donate directly to me, our team, or join the ranks and start fundraising on our behalf.
Whatever you want to do. We don't want to stifle your creativity.
And tune in on the 26th around 9AM Pacific or whenever I can get my ass out of bed to watch me lose my
fucking mind as I live stream straight for 24-hours.
Seriously going to need a better dealer by then.
Anyway, if we hit $50,000, I'll straight up tell you who Steve is
even though the creative team behind the show will probably skewer me for it.
Too bad the channel is too cheap for that. That's right! Shots fired, motherfuckers!
See you November 26th.