[Applause]
[Music]
so good morning everyone
I hope everyone is awake so I'll get
started going up public speaking was one
of my greatest fears I was not serious a
couple quiet kid always hid in the back
of the costume I never wanted to raise
my hand you might be wondering that how
any why I might even speak to you all
right now well like many others with a
great fear I've heard an avoiding mine
for as long as possible but a sporadic
decision in the 8th grade to try
something new
forced me to face my fears earlier than
I'd expected it was in the 8th grade
that I joined Speech and Debate and I
was them on my perspective on what
failure was changed forever
today I want to share with you the story
of how I overcame my fear of public
speaking and developed a passion for it
despite initially struggling my story
first starts out in the autumn months of
2016 when it was just cold enough for
you to start wearing your sweater to
school and the leaves had just begun
following for the past several months my
Wednesday evenings had consisted of
political discussions and the images of
messy arrows on whiteboards this one's a
evening would be the same I would walk
into that classroom I would greet my
coach and then I would bring my
classmates but there was a twist this
one day evening I finally have to do
something that I had been dreading since
the moment I first stopped inside that
classroom and it was to give a
two-minute speech on the nationally set
topic that month was just so happened to
be about the Cuban embargo now for many
others a two-minute speech is really
nothing but for me standing up and
talking for two minutes was like an
immense and an impossible challenge the
fact that the speech was impromptu
already
young boy freaking me out even more was
that this would be an exposition round
or one in front of all of my classmates
yeah on that day by some force of will I
dragged myself out there and I sat down
facing what seemed like an endless row
of people the debate started and thought
the entire first half abound I was
pretty much distracted the voices and
the words of my opponents were flying
right past my head and my eyes were
shifting around aimlessly it was only
after an awkward silence and a nudge of
my knee that I knew it was my turn to
start speaking so I stood up knees
shaking I looked down at my flow and I
pressed the start button on my timer
propelling myself into what I thought
was uncharted territory yet the more I
stood up there the more disoriented I
became I was trying to say something
about the Cuban embargo but then what
was the Cuban embargo why was it even
important the complex ideas in my head
were coming out as incoherent jumbles of
words and I was frustrated yet there was
nothing I could do about it and at that
moment I cared more about how my
classmates perceive the words that came
out of my mouth then how much I was
actually learning or gaining from that
experience out of the corner of my eye I
saw student laughing were they laughing
at me how do I said something wrong what
did I even say wrong and before I knew
it the feeling that many are too
familiar with overtook me sweaty palms
and shaky hands but there was something
unexpected and I was tears tears of
humiliation and in front of my entire
class I found a moment my embarrassment
boiled over and I did the one thing I
didn't want to do that day which was to
run away and to this day I can still
hear the sound of my classmates laughter
as I ran out of that room now that
situation is pretty traumatic and in
today's society we've characterized what
happened in my very first debate round
as an epic failure or a foul which is
why
it might be surprising to some of you
but I actually attribute that experience
to being the reason behind why I enjoy
speech and debate so much today to the
care at that time I also thought it was
an epic failure
I'd worked up enough courage to even
step back inside that classroom I merely
hid in the back like I had growing up
invisible and wishing that I could
disappear in fact it took me about a
good week before I could even look back
into the eyes of my coach of my
classmates again yeah after that initial
shame and embarrassment wore off
something extraordinary happened in the
following rounds I became more daring
saying things I normally would not have
said even if someone paid me a million
dollars to and I became more assertive I
wouldn't let others speak over me during
crossfire
and if I had something to do to say I
would say it no how could this even
happen it seemed like my failure was
strangely liberating and that my fear
was almost all but gone it seems crazy
but I don't deeper into the relationship
between fear and failure things began to
make more sense fear and failure are
closely intertwined it was then that I
realized that my fear of public speaking
wasn't actually a fear of public
speaking but a fear of failing at it
there's actually a term for fear of
failure and that's a tic of phobia which
according to many medical professionals
is the reason why so many people lead a
confined lifestyle now in the context of
my story the reason why I feared public
speaking wasn't because I didn't like
people or I didn't like to talk to
people but it was because I was afraid
that I would fail and embarrass myself
but experiencing that failure that I
feared so much changed everything
before I had gone through that
experience I heard of failing as falling
into a deep dark hole one that you would
never be able to get out of but after
going through that experience I realized
that failure is more like having an
extra set of stairs that you have to
climb before you reach your goal and if
you do failure from this perspective
then there's no actual reason to fear it
as long as you can and you're willing to
climb up those extra set of stairs
you'll eventually be able to get where
you want to so in the following weeks
after my meltdown I got back into the
classroom I tried again I started and
most importantly I learned and my
classmates and my coach slowly began to
forget about what I happened and things
began to look up however if you never
once go through such an experience or
experience failure then failure will
forever mayne is that dark and scary
monster that looms over you and the rest
of the decisions you make in your
lifetime sometimes I even used this
failure isn't that bad thinking to
empower myself I think well I was able
to make it out of around where I was
crying and still come back and try again
then I saw no reason to fear failing in
the future however there are still
situations today where I'm uncomfortable
and that's okay for example a couple of
weeks ago when I went to a debate
tournament I still got a little nervous
before I stood up to deliver my speech
to a judge or a little bit to shovelled
when I was battling against particularly
tough opponents during crossfire even a
couple minutes ago before I
stuffed onto this stage I was feeling
that familiar throb of nervousness but
what's most important is to realize that
if you're able to take that initial leap
and get over that initial fear then you
can and you will be able to continue now
why does this even matter and how is it
relevant to real life well in real life
we encounter the possibility of failure
everywhere whether it be a job interview
sports team tryout maybe even a test
screen what I want you to do is to
embrace that possibility instead of
escaping from it view failure in a
different light instead of strictly
categorizing everything as either a
success or fail no failure as a sort of
middle ground or an opportunity to
improve and I know that since most of
you have just entered high school you
probably feel pressure in one form or
another to excel at an academic an
extracurricular or both what I want you
to do and what I want you to know is
that it's okay if you don't excel at
something or anything most importantly
instead of beating yourself up
you should channel that energy into
improvement and growth and look at the
bigger picture debate is one of my
favorite activities today through I met
countless people from around the world
I've gone through some crazy experiences
and I've learned so much more than I
could have ever imagined when I first
started I have the privilege of leading
the mgraveli debate team and guiding the
novices through the challenges that I
first encountered when I was younger but
most importantly what I realized is that
I wouldn't be standing here today if I
hadn't failed in my very first round
thank you
you
[Applause]