(crying) (intense music)
- I got you, I got you, I got you.
One second!
(mumbles), this isn't a nightmare.
This isn't a nightmare at all!
(upbeat music)
Well internet.
You asked for it, now I'm doing it.
(barking dog) I'm babysitting again, (beep).
Well, (barking dog)
(beep)
Well, (barking dog)
(beep)
I'm watching two babies! (whirring helicopter engine)
Jesus Christ!
What neighborhood is this?
(hammering jack) Is that a jack hammer?
(whirring helicopter engine) And a helicopter?
Two of the loudest things (laughs)!
Apparently, (upbeat music)
the audience's favorite Try It Guys' video
is when I babysat Ned's baby.
I just have to keep him alive, right?
Oh, are you hungry? (crying)
Oh, I know, I know!
Oh, okay, okay.
I'm just not the most paternal type.
So today, I'm doing it again.
(crying) - Oh it's okay.
(crying) Because it's nap time.
- Oh, okay.
- She.
- She, why is she crying?
Why is she crying? - Because it's nap time.
- But not one baby.
Is it okay that they're just like flopping around
like little fish?
I'm (beep) doing two.
Can't say (beep)!
- Thank goodness you're here.
- No, no, no.
Why would you give me the baby so fast?
- Because I have another baby to get.
Come here, come here.
- Do parents of twins just find out and go "Oh, shit?"
(crying) (mumbling)
- Two babies can be a lot.
The ultimate goal, is to keep them on the same schedule.
Because if you get off schedule,
you will never, ever, ever have a break.
(intense music) Never ever, ever
have a break.
- What if one of them doesn't go to sleep?
- Yeah, (laughing)
that's, that's a problem.
June is a real go getter.
She is going to go get what she wants.
She is the most active baby I have ever known.
Poppy is interested in books.
She's interested in you.
- Okay she now has my mic in her mouth.
- She's interested in cuddles.
She's just the sweetest!
- [Eugene] So you have like a Slytherin Ravenclaw
(laughing) with June.
- [Rachel] Yes.
- [Eugene] And then a Hufflepuff Gryffindor with Poppy.
This helps me a lot.
- Cool lets go to their room.
- Oh, you ready to go to your room, Ju, Pop,
Pop-- - Poppy.
- Poppy (laughs).
- So they're still in their PJs.
- [Eugene] Okay.
- So you better change them.
- What am I doing today while you are out?
- [Rachel] They're gonna need to sleep.
- Okay. - They're gonna need to eat.
Taking them out for a walk.
Playing with them.
Every month on their actual month birthday,
I take the same photo.
They're eight months today,
so you have to get a photo for me.
- [Eugene] Okay I like the photo shoot.
- [Rachel] Mm-hmm (affirmative).
- Do I have to do everything that you said before that?
- Yes.
(dramatic music)
- [Rachel] So first things first,
(mellow music) here are their bottles.
- [Eugene] Uh-huh.
- The nipples are in here.
(laughing)
- Do they really call them nipples?
- Yes!
- Oh. - They're called nipples.
They're nipples!
This is super fun, they love this!
- Oh. - You hang this
on their door frame.
- That looks real kinky.
(laughing)
- We don't fit in this!
- Oh it's fun, it's fun for babies.
(laughing) I'm sure it's
for babies, sure, y'all. (laughing)
- [Rachel] Here's the double carrier.
- [Eugene] Uh-huh.
- It's very simple.
You put one baby on your back
and then you hook the front one to the back one.
(crying) - Oh, do you
wanna go to bed?
- Sleep tight. - Do you wanna
go to bed? (crying)
- No. (mumbling)
(crying) It's okay, it's okay.
- [Rachel] So we watch them on the monitor.
- There's a baby missing.
- (laughs) I know.
- June escaped.
- It does look like there's a baby missing.
- (laughs) Yeah!
- [Rachel] The camera's just trying to connect.
It's on a delay and at four a.m.,
when you've put them down
and walk back in here and look at it,
you'll see yourself in there putting them down.
(dramatic music) And you're like "Oh my god!"
- And the one time that you put them down
and then you look up at yourself,
(intense music) and you smile.
(laughing) And do this.
Okay. - I'll See you
in like a full work day. (upbeat music)
(barking dog) Good luck!
- Bye, I'm so glad we're doing this.
So it's been thirty minutes and the babies are still asleep
and I think I should wake them up now,
because they probably need to get fed.
(dinging bell)
How do you wake up,
I've never woken a baby up.
(dinging bell)
Is there a proper way to wake a baby up?
Do you just, shake them (laughs)?
(dinging bell)
No, you don't shake the babies?
Okay.
(cooing)
Get up.
Oh I'm sorry.
You look very upset that I made the sun come in.
I'm so sorry.
(whining) How does this go up?
(whimsical music) Is there,
a cord?
Do you know how this works, June?
I thought the babies would be
(mumbles). (crying)
Oh I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming.
(crying) Oh it's okay, it's okay.
It's okay, oh! (crying)
Oh it's okay.
I think they're hungry, that's what it is, huh?
It must be nice to cry and then have people come feed you.
Oh, I can see your sister on the camera.
That's how Rachel does it.
Look, isn't that real creepy?
They're watching you.
They're watching you all the time.
(whimsical music)
Like a protein shake.
Stick it in your mouth.
(laughing)
You're hungry, aren't you?
Follow.
Copy.
Copy Poppy.
Should I have put bibs on them?
(dinging)
(whimsical music) Mm!
Do they have to finish the whole bottle?
(dinging)
God, my arms are tired.
Oh, man.
How long does it take for babies to drink the whole bottle?
Maybe if I use like a deeper voice.
I'll make them drink faster, because they're scared.
Whoa, it's the delicious milk, yeah.
All right, I think we had about half.
(dinging)
Oh my god!
Are you standing up?
(cooing) Are you supporting your,
nope (laughs).
No she's not (laughs)!
I wanna hear you burp.
You ready to change?
June, June?
June don't crawl away.
Okay, now you're just chewing on the towel.
You ready to change?
Come on June.
Did you burp?
I'm gonna assume you did.
Let's change y'all now.
Rachel has great taste
(baby cooing) in baby clothes.
Okay, we about to have a nice fashion design moment.
I'm gonna give you the most beautiful,
latest styles from Paris.
I don't know which one's gonna look better
in gold and green.
Arms up!
Okay.
Poppy, you gotta work with me here.
Okay.
Oh you like this one better?
(cooing) Okay (laughs).
Oh hi, hi June.
One second, I'm dealing with your, do you like my watch?
Oh yeah!
Look at you!
Oh, she just burped.
There we go!
(crying) That's okay,
here look at my watch.
Look at my watch.
(crying)
I thought this was gonna be easier.
- You will never ever, ever, have a break.
- One's crying. (upbeat techno music)
One's playing with her clothes
that I'm trying to get her in to.
(crying)
June, June, it's okay! (crying)
Look it's a bear! (crying)
Once I put one down, the other one needs attention.
(crying)
No, Poppy, Poppy, it's okay! (crying)
It's okay. (crying)
I'm coming.
Once the other one needs attention,
then the other one needs attention.
(crying)
Oh, okay.
I gotcha, it's okay.
(crying) It's okay.
No! (crying)
You guys ready for the walk?
I think you're just really tired
of being inside the house, huh?
Okay, wait, what did I do with the other one (laughs)?
All right.
(clicking)
Poppy.
Poppy, look at me.
Poppy. (clicking)
Oh!
(crying) No, no, it's okay.
What do you want? (crying)
What do you want?
Do you think she's still hungry?
(dinging)
Oh, I'm coming!
Okay, you gotta just stay here one second.
Look who it is, the other one!
(cooing)
Oh, why do you have only one shoe on?
(cooing)
All right. (crying)
Oh it's okay.
(crying) Oh, it's okay.
It's okay, it's okay. (crying)
It's okay.
(crying)
(sighs) This is a nightmare.
(sighs) Watch more babies, the internet said.
They seem to have calmed down, now that we're walking.
June was not happy with me.
Showing her real Slytherin side.
(sighing)
Okay (sighs).
Sit your bootie down.
Sit your bootie down, I've got to get your sister.
Okay (sighs).
(ringing bell) (relaxing music)
Don't hit her in the face with it, June.
Oh!
You just hit her in the face!
(dramatic music) (baby crying)
Why would you do that?
I literally just told you not to hit her in the face.
(crying) I'm so sorry
she did that to you.
It's okay! (crying)
- Never have a break.
(crying)
- This is too much work for one person.
(crying) Oh no, I got you,
it's okay. (crying)
It's okay.
Oh, no no!
It's okay! (crying)
It just kinda feels like babies cry
until they get what they want.
(crying) Okay, I got you, I got you.
I got you. (crying)
Oh okay. (crying)
What do you want?
Okay, guys you can't eat shoes, you can't eat shoes.
Uh, everyone's having a great time.
Oh, of course.
(cooing)
Of course.
Your uncle's gonna need a nap after this.
(dramatic music) You smell that?
Okay!
No kicking!
You are on a very high changing table.
(crying)
What?
Is this too much?
Oh fuck, okay.
Oh, shit.
Oh, fuck.
Dammit.
Don't remember those words, Poppy.
(dramatic music) Okay June, I'm coming.
(crying)
I almost got the bottle ready.
Strategizing plan.
June is playing in the living room.
I put Poppy down.
Stay right there, Poppy.
(intense violin music) Run and grab June.
(crying) Wait, wait.
Wait, wait.
Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.
(crying)
Here we go, here we go.
It's working!
Milk is working!
(sighs) So I'm gonna call my producer Nick in,
to help me with this double baby carrier,
because it's too dangerous to do it yourself.
(upbeat music) Strap the baby in, Nick.
(mumbling)
Oh, un-clip? - Do like that and then.
- How does Rachel do this?
Does she, does her husband help, I guess?
I know.
Yes, I need many servants
(laughing) to help get me into my
wardrobe for the day.
(laughing) Oh, you like this?
Okay. - This goes around here.
- Uh-huh and we just want
to make sure. (mumbling)
What's this for?
Mmm.
- It's very simple.
Hook the front one to the back one.
(crying)
- I think she's-- - I think it's supposed to be.
- On the outside? (crying)
- Hold on you gotta get, - this goes in the strap.
- Yep. - Yeah,
that's right. - I feel like these should go.
- What did they look like in the
photo? (mumbling)
- I got her.
Maybe they're
just like that? (clicking)
- Is that better?
♪ Uncle's hands are free ♪
- I can do whatever I want,
because both of these bad boys are ready to go.
So...
It's really hot.
(upbeat music) I'm gonna go do
whatever I want.
Whoa, Rachel!
Look how much whisky they have!
Look at it!
You know what?
Whisky's too hard.
I should find some wine.
Wait, isn't that what I said last time when I watched Wes?
I am watching your baby, so I shouldn't be drinking whisky.
A little celebratory juice. (jazzy music)
I'm really scared to swing around and just smack Poppy.
June's head against something.
Mmm, and my hands are free to wash the evidence
before Rachel comes home.
♪ Mommy doesn't have to know ♪
♪ Mommy never has to know ♪
There's one last thing I gotta to do.
Because my hands are free,
I might as well prep for it
while they're strapped to me.
Gotta take this baby photo for eight months of life.
(laughs) Oh, yeah!
Oh good job, everyone!
You're fashion models
(upbeat dance music) looking amazing.
Your mom's gonna love it!
Yeah!
Follow my voice!
Good babies.
Look up this way.
Everyone look at me.
Eight months old.
They looked at this like this was drugs.
Distraction!
Wow!
It's a color!
It's a color and a shape!
Yeah!
Woo woo!
Woo (laughs)!
Brrr, yeah, eight months old!
Good babies!
Smile, (laughs) yeah!
F, yeah!
Yeah, we did it!
Okay I'm gonna get this away from you,
so you don't eat it. (cooing)
Yeah, we did an awesome job!
(cooing)
Yeah!
(jazzy music)
All right, well.
I guess while we're walking, I'll teach you some new words.
That's a porta potty.
That's a tire.
(laughing)
Hello!
Good.
(sighs) Whew, how we doing loves?
How we, how we doing?
Ba, da, ba, da, ba.
How much is the sun hitting you?
Whoop, you are getting hit by the sun!
Boop!
Good bye (laughs).
Off roading.
Okay, we're back home.
(cooing)
She just said put it up on the door frame?
(clattering)
(laughs) So I'm gonna put a baby in that?
(whimsical music) - And you're gonna
put your baby on their back.
- Okay, I think the rest is pretty self explanatory.
Who wants to go first?
You ready, June?
(cooing) Gonna put you down.
Put your legs through.
(ringing bell)
(cooing)
One small step for June!
One giant leap for woman kind!
Just give me a second.
(laughing)
Okay, one second.
(laughs) Maybe a little too high.
Needs a little more slack.
(bouncing) She enjoying herself?
Wee!
Oh, wee!
And it's your turn, Poppy!
(classical music)
Wow, that's really fucking cute.
(cooing) Freaking cute.
Sorry (laughs).
I ruined it!
I ruined the moment.
Time for diaper change.
Poppy, you're just gonna stay there like a good girl,
while I change your sister.
Then I'm gonna put you both to sleep.
Poppy you're doing great!
You are very grabby, June!
I know you want to be an adventurer,
but you have got to, oh!
Okay, we're not gonna let your mom know that was you.
Oh what a good job, June.
Here we go to the crib.
♪ To the crib ♪
There you go.
Pacifier. (crying)
Here we go.
Nope, no, no, no.
No, no, no (laughs).
(baby cooing) (relaxing music)
I just don't want their legs to get caught.
She's kicking.
June, you gotta be careful with your leg.
That makes me too nervous.
Her leg keeps going through.
(laughing)
Poppy.
(relaxing music)
I'm tired.
There's this moment of like calm
for several minutes after they wake up.
It's very nice.
(upbeat music) (knocking)
Come in!
Welcome to my home.
Oh, hi. - Hi!
How are you?
(cooing) Clementine.
- Hi my baby.
- Oh, well I brought you a gift.
- Oh my goodness! - It's really hard
to do things,
- Oh my s-- that you really
don't wanna do.
- Thank you for the present!
- You're welcome. - For being an Uncle.
- Uncle juice! - Oh!
Oh you know me too well! - Have you had this one?
- Sazerac Rye?
- [Rachel] It's so good!
- We had a great time today, didn't we?
- Did you have a good time?
- I had a time.
So they were more self sufficient than Wes,
in some ways - Mm-hmm (affirmative).
- But because there's two of them,
- Right. - some things were
just really difficult, because I think they understood
when they should have been getting the same thing
their sister got.
- Uh-huh! - The clothes was the worst.
- It's really hard!
- Yeah, because I'd just try to finish
getting clothes on one and the other one
wants to get dressed.
But they're both really sweet.
I like how they have very different personalities.
- They're good to babysit at this age,
because they can't tell on you yet.
- Oh, but I didn't do anything bad,
(laughing) did I?
No!
- Did he? - No, I didn't.
- Would you do it again?
- Yes, for you.
And for money.
(laughing)
(upbeat music)
I did not say one curse word.
- Did you really?
- On purpose.
- Let's fucking do it.
Oh, shit.
Oh, fuck.
(laughing)
Sorry, don't show Rachel that footage.