[Please keep these captions clean for those who need them. Funny extras can be added to the English (Canada) subs. Thank you!]
VEGETA: You know, at a time like this I really only have one thing to say to you:
BITCH-SLAP!
KRILLIN: OH SNAP!
VEGETA: And as for the rest of you… I’m going to end this...
with a BIG BANG
...kind of attack.
Huaaaaaaaaa...!
Huaaaaaaaaa...! GOKU: Oh, this isn’t going to end well...
VEGETA: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!
KRILLIN: WAA-HAA! VEGETA: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!
GOKU: AAAH...!
GOHAN: WAAAH...!
{DOOM}
{BOOM}
VEGETA: (Panting)
Oh, you have GOT to be kidding me! They’re still alive?! Oh, to hell with it...
'I may not have enough energy to kill you all at ONCE, but I can still kill all of you without any troub--'
YAJIROBE: YYUUUUUNNGGGHH!!!
VEGETA: Ah! Yeeaaaugh!
YAJIROBE: Ungh!
VEGETA: You... you cut through my armor! This was a gift from my FATHER!
YAJIROBE: D'ah I’m sorry, I’m sure your father was a great man!
VEGETA: I HATED my father!
YAJIROBE: Oh well then I’m sure your father was a total prick.
VEGETA: How dare you talk about my father like that!
{POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} Hahahah! Finally! I can just sit back and enjoy myself.
{POW} {POW} {POW} No cares in the world! [Heartbeat]
{POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} I can beat these worthless cretins all day long and I…. [Heartbeat]
[Heartbeat]
I think I’m forgetting something...
[Inhuman growling]
Oh dammit, the kid! That’s right!!!
'Oh wait, I’ll just become the mighty Oozaru and...'
wait...
I don’t have my tail! This fat bastard cut it off!!
YAJIROBE: Hahaaaa...
Ungh!
{POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} {POW} VEGETA: No, no, stop it! Stop it damn you!
WHYYY?! WHY WON’T YOU PEOPLE JUST DIIIE?!
WHYYY?! WHY WON’T YOU PEOPLE JUST DIIIE?! GOHAN: (growling)
KRILLIN: Yay! Gohan’s transformed! He’s gonna save us all!
GOHAN: (Repeated roars)
KRILLIN: Oh no! Gohan’s transformed! He’s gonna kill us all!!
GOHAN: ROARRRGH!
GOKU: Gohan? This is Daddy… [Gohan cotinues to roar in the background]
I know you’re angry right now... but you have to focus your anger.
Re--... remember Icarus?
[Icarus chittering]
[Energy building up]
{BOOM}
GOHAN: Nrrrrrgh...
GOKU [off-screen]: He did it!
GOHAN: ROOOOOOAAAAARRRRRGH!
VEGETA: OH THAT'S *BULLS**T*!
[Crash]
I haven't killed a damned thing since I got to this godforsaken planet!
...Not for lack of trying, mind you!
GOHAN: (Roaring) VEGETA: Hunh!
Hey, *fatass*! You wanna take off this one’s tail too?!
YAJIROBE: Auuughh... ugggghhh... ehhuhh...
VEGETA: FINE! I’ll DO IT MYSELF THEN!
[Slash]
GOHAN: (groaning)
VEGETA: Haha! I did it!
♪ I’m the best... around! ♪
♪ No-one’s ever gonna keep me down! ♪
GOHAN: (groaning)
VEGETA: No… NOOOOO!!!!
[Booming crash]
'Crushed and broken beneath an unconscious naked child...'
'Yep... I think I'm done here.'
{BEEPBEEP} 'Yep... I think I'm done here.'
{BEEPBEEP}
KIRK: So, Mister Spock, what do you make, of this... ship?
SPOCK: Well, sir, I would have find it highly illogical to refer to this as a “ship”;
the spherical design incorporates no propulsion system. It looks more like an orbiting vessel, or a satell--
KIRK: AAH-AAH! SPOCK: AAH-AAH!
[Pod whooshing]
KIRK: …Suck it, Spock!
[Pod whooshes, thuds]
[Ka-chunk]
VEGETA: 'Alright, I’m just gonna get in my ship...'
'gonna fly back to Freeza Station...'
'and I’m gonna sleep this off like a baaad hangover...'
KRILLIN: You’re not going anywhere!
You think you can kill all of our friends and threaten our lives, and just *leave*?!
VEGETA: Would you be surprised if I said “yes”?
KRILLIN: I’m going to end this!
KRILLIN: I’m going to end this! And YOU!
KRILLIN: I’m going to end this! And YOU! RIGHT NOW!
KRILLIN: I’m going to end this! And YOU! RIGHT NOW! NOW DIE!!
YAAAAAAAAAAA--!!
GOKU: Krillin!
Wait!
Vegeta...
are you sorry?
VEGETA: W--... what?
GOKU: If you say you’re sorry, Vegeta... then you can leave.
VEGETA: ...You can't be serious.
KRILLIN: What are you talking about, Goku??
He killed all our friends!
GOKU: But, Krillin... if he’s sorry... truly sorry...
then there’s nothing we can do.
VEGETA: I’m sorry. Yep, *totally* sorry. I just feel terrible.
GOKU: Let him go, Krillin.
KRILLIN: But, but Goku...!
VEGETA: Yes, I'm very, very, very sorry…
[Door slams]
...That you’re all still alive! SUCKERS!! AAHAHA! HA! OH! AH! Ow it hurts to laugh!
♪♪ NARRATOR: And so our heroes looked towards the sky, their battle finally over and victory on their side.
Many lives were lost, many lessons were learned, and I made out with a cool one-hundred thou!
KING KAI: You cheating son of a--!
NARRATOR: Can’t hear you, don’t care!
Now, where was I…
How will our heroes bring back their fallen compatriots?
What new dangers will present themselves?
Has anyone REALLY not seen this show already?
Find out in the next season of Dragonball Z Abridged!
♪♪
{TCHING}
[Pod whooshes]
VEGETA: 'They’ve broken my body.'
'I failed in my mission to find the Dragonballs.'
'I even lost my tail.'
'But at least... it can’t get any worse... from here...'
???: Vegeta….
Vegeeeeeeeetaaa….
VEGETA: Wh-- what?
{DING}
GHOST NAPPA: I’m haunting you!
VEGETA: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♪♪ Ghostbusters theme ♪♪
GHOST NAPPA: ♪♪ Vegegeta-geta.....gegegegegeta ♪♪
Vegegeta.... ♪♪
Chorus: GHOST NAPPA! Yeeeah! ♪♪
GHOST NAPPA: If there’s something strange / in your neighborhood. ♪♪
Guess who it is? ♪♪
Chorus: GHOST NAPPA! ♪♪
GHOST NAPPA: Is it something weird? / And it don’t look good. ♪♪
Guess who it is? ♪♪
Chorus: GHOST NAPPA! ♪♪
Yo, Vegeta-geta-geta-geta-getageta ♪♪
Geta-geta-geta-you know you love me as a ghost- getageta ♪♪
Geta-geta-geta-geta-getageta ♪♪
Geta-geta-geta-geta-WHOOOOO! ♪♪