-Welcome to "The Tonight Show," everybody.
Thank you so much for being here.
Thank you for watching at home. [ Cheers and applause ]
Happy Cinco de Mayo!
[ Cheers and applause ] ♪♪
Yeah, it's that one day when people are excited to hear
someone say, "I've got Corona!"
But what a day.
After two years of working from home,
it was nice to have those vaguely problematic parties
back in the office again.
Yeah.
That's right -- it's Cinco de Mayo,
and I guess that explains this announcement that I saw today.
-Cinco de Mayo is a special day in Mexico's history,
but, sadly, not many people know
what this holiday commemorates.
-And neither do we! [ Air horn blows ]
So come on down to Chili's for a classic margarita
that we've turned neon blue so you can get conquistador-crunk.
Chili's -- arrivederci!
[ Air horn blows ]
-What?
It sounds like a great deal at Chili's.
And this is fun.
7-Eleven celebrated by offering
three spicy breakfast empanadas and a coffee for just $4.
Yeah, it's great.
You just walk in and order the "El Baño."
They know what to do.
-Oy! -Listen to this.
I read that each year on Cinco de Mayo,
Americans eat about 80 million pounds of avocados.
Wow! 80 million pounds.
-Oh, man.
I love the food on Cinco de Mayo.
[ Laughter ]
-Cool. That's nice, Tariq.
-Hey, you want to know what my favorite Cinco de Mayo food is?
-Uh, I mean, not right now,
but we can definitely talk later if you want to
talk about which foods --
-Tacos!
♪♪
If you're looking for a spicy meal to give you
all the feels, then you've got to try some
food from this dude.
I'm talking about Tariq's Tacos Fantasticos!
They'll make your mouth go loco
while you sip some rum and Diet Coke-o.
All you need to make these zesty-ass tacos are
tortillas...chicken...cheese...
peppers...diced onions...guac...
and a little bit of cilantro.
Ladies -- [ Cheers and applause ]
Hey, ladies, these tacos are DTF.
By which I mean, delicious, Tariq-approved, and fabuloso.
And if you're feeling like it's naughty o'clock,
then do yourself a favor and squeeze some lime.
-Oh, wow.
-God damn!
Every taste is like a gift for your face.
Back to you, Jimmy. -Wow.
Oh, my gosh. [ Cheers and applause ]
Wow.
Tariq, those look great.
Those look great.
-Yeah, I don't need your approval
to feel good about myself, homey.
Get back to your show. [ Laughter ]
-Alright, meanwhile, today...
[ Laughter ]
Who's that character, man?
-He cracked himself up. Who was that guy?
-Great, dude.
Meanwhile, today, President Biden hosted
a Cinco de Mayo reception in the Rose Garden
with the First Lady of Mexico, yeah.
Biden talked about the warm relationship
between the U.S. and Mexico.
It's better than Trump's message on Cinco de Mayo,
which was, "Think outside the bun."
Speaking of Biden, apparently, he's been telling allies
that he's almost certainly going to run in 2024 if Trump does.
Yep, Biden against Trump.
It's great news for all the people
who wish it was 2020 again.
Right now, all the debate moderators are like, "Not it!"
Yeah.
Some business news.
Airbnb just announced that it will be enforcing
strict anti-party measures on summer holidays,
like Memorial Day and Fourth of July.
Yep, it's serious.
If you break the partying rules,
a person you've never met before will be furious at you.
Hey, I saw that Mountain Dew
just released a new drink called Purple Thunder.
Here it is. Look at this. Ooh, yeah.
-Ooh!
-Looks like someone put Barney the Dinosaur
through a Nutribullet.
There are only two ingredients --
caffeine and Robitussin.
Can we see that again?
And the bottle was perfectly straight
until they poured in the Mountain Dew.
It's interesting.
Did you guys see this?
Yesterday, the Houston Astros took on the Seattle Mariners,
and one of the Astros players, José Altuve, had a rough at bat.
Take a look at this.
-Oh, my!
-Oh!
-Give him all the time.
-Yeah. -Whoa!
-"Give him all the time."
Yeah. Ooh.
Two balls, one strike.
I know. That's... [ Rimshot ]
-Oy!
-Right after that, he ordered an ice cream in a tiny helmet
and shoved it down his pants.
I heard about a family in Massachusetts
who thought that they rescued a lost puppy,
but it actually turned out to be a baby coyote.
They knew it was a coyote when it tried to
blow up the house with dynamite and run off a cliff.
Did you guys hear about this?
Today, after a United flight landed in Chicago,
a man opened the emergency exit, walked out on the wing,
and slid down to the tarmac.
Anyway, happy Cinco de Mayo, everyone.
Be safe out there, you know?