What’s up guys, hope you’re doing well.
If you’re new to the show, in these videos I talk about things that I hate; things I’m
just Not About That Life.
For example, the Harlem Shake, not the old one, the new one.
And if you don’t know what I’m talking about I don’t really know how you’re watching
this video right now…cause obviously you don’t have any Internet connection…
…Cause this thing’s everywhere.
The best way I can describe it is there are 30-second clips.
The first half is with one person dancing and then when the beat drops, when they say,
“Now do the Harlem Shake”, everyone else around just starts dancing.
That’s…that’s it.
That’s really it.
It’s actually pretty cool because a lot of people are coming together.
You see old people, skinny people, fat people.
You see some colleges coming together and doing this.
But with everything on YouTube, it’s just getting really played out.
It’s been played out more than the first level of Super Mario.
And the thing I don’t understand is:
Why is it called the Harlem Shake?
No one is doing the Harlem Shake in the video.
How did they get the Harlem Shake from this?
What?
That’s the only thing I don’t understand.
Why is it called the Harlem Shake?
No one is doing that.
I’m just glad we don’t have any more Gangnam Style parodies, but I have a feeling this
one’s going to be worse.
And for that, I’m just Not About That Life.
So Valentine’s Day was a couple of days ago.
I actually went to the store to pick up some flowers, some candy for my lady friend.
Might’ve been my mom.
I might just be making this up for YouTube.
You don’t really know, do you?
As I get everything in my cart, I go over to the cashier…a couple people in front
of me.
I wait diligently.
Then when I get to the cashier, you know how you make small talk?
I was making some small talk.
I was like:
“Hey man, how’s it going?
Busy day?”
“Yeah, it’s always busy on Valentine’s Day.
I always just work late on Valentine’s Day cause I never really have anyone to spend
it with.”
Why would you put me in that situation?
I don’t know what to say now!
What would you say?
I don’t know what to say!
“Uhh, cheer up.
It’ll get better.”
It probably won’t.
I’m not going to lie to him.
What do you want me to say?
Now everyone in line is looking at me, seeing what I’m going to say to him.
I don’t know what to say to him.
You just made this whole thing awkward for no reason.
Not About That Life.
So I make it back to my house…and I don’t know about you guys, but I really can’t
fall asleep at night without watching a little bit of TV.
Normally, I watch a movie to go to sleep.
So I’m looking through the movie guide and we have movies on demand.
I can go through and see any type of movie I want to watch and watch it instantly.
So I find a movie.
It’s called the Human Centipede.
My friend recommended this movie to me.
First off, we’re no longer friends anymore.
Second off, I watched the movie.
Third off, I shouldn’t have watched the movie.
Let me just give you the plot of this movie and you tell me if you were a friend, if you
would recommend this to your other friend.
A deranged doctor captures people so he can experiment on them and create a “human centipede”
by connecting the face of an individual with an anus.
Face to anus.
Three people.
Human centipede.
Feed the first one, goes through the second one, comes out the third one.
Yeah!
This is the movie I watched.
I watched the whole thing too.
I was in too deep, OK!
I couldn’t just go back.
It’s like 2 a.m. in the morning.
You can’t watch another movie starting at 2 a.m.
I may or may not have had nightmares.
I will not disclose that information.
Here’s where it gets good, there’s a sequel to the Human Centipede.
A sequel!
And here’s where it gets even better than that.
There’s a threequel!
That means three!
One, two, tres.
Un, deux, trios.
Pretty sure that’s how you say it in French.
I’m not sure.
I didn’t take it in high school.
Filming for the Human Centipede #3 is scheduled to take place in May 2013.
DAHECK!
Who watches this?
Not About That Life.
Those are just a couple things that I’m Not About That Life.
What are you Not About That Life?
meganwashurr writes:
“Needing to pee, but don’t want to get out of bed.”
That’s happened to me many times.
Some times you just gotta hold it.
Kristen Rega writes:
“A group of teenagers anywhere in close proximity to your seat at a movie theatre.”
Sometimes they kick your seat, makes you want to dropkick them in the throat.
And finally Kyle tweets:
“When you leave the house with no lotion.”
OK.
Make sure to leave a comment down below and maybe you could be featured in next week’s
video.
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Press the like button.
New videos every Sunday.
No Jugamos Juegos.
Throw me the alley.
I’m driving down the street, I don’t know where else I’d be driving down, and arrive
at a parking lot of a movie theatre.
I was on my way Les Misérables.
Sike!
I saw The Hobbit.
I’m a grown man.