- This video is sponsored by Surfshark VPN.
- Cooky. - Da Vinky?
- Groovy. - Da Vinky?
(laughing)
Da Vinky? (laughing)
- Why are we like this?
Hey, you, My name is Thomas TomSka Ridgewell.
- I'm Elliot Gough. - And I'm Eddie Bowley.
- And welcome back to "Content", the final episode.
- Surprise.
(laughing)
- Yup, this is it. We are at the 100th episode of "Content".
A series started two and a half years ago,
wherein I threw my fucks away for them never to return.
I've asked you boys to come back in,
just to film this last one,
which is where we we're all awkwardly far apart.
We are COVID safe, as safe as we can be.
I was thinking maybe we could make a habit
of doing this again, but no, we're going back into lockdown.
- What you do? wha whey whe
- You can look at me.
When you're talking to me, look at me.
- I don't want to.
- Look at the lens, if you're talking to the audience
- What we're doing today, Tom?
- Well, Elliot, thanks for asking.
I thought we would do the things we've done. (laughing)
- Why's he so bad at explaining the basic games?
- Like I would have gotten better.
We're doing a bunch of the games we've done in "Content".
You remember that headphone challenge we did?
We're going to do that one.
- We're going to revisit the classics.
- Sounds boring. - Oh.
(group laughing)
Now, boys, I think we can all agree that I have first place
in "Content", as it's my series and I'm brilliant.
- I want to see the stats on that.
- No, so this game is to determine who is second
and who is third place in "Content",
which is why I will be pitting you both against each other
in mortal combat, and by mortal combat,
I mean a series of incredibly insignificant, stupid,
irreverent games.
- Boy, the first game I thought we'd play
would be Cunning Linguists.
- Remember that one? - Nope.
- Oh.
What I've done is I've taken an assortment of movies,
TV shows, games, but all from this year,
this nightmare year, and I've used a thesaurus
to change the words within the title,
and I'm going to present them to you
and you have to figure out what they actually are.
- There were movies this year? - Technically.
Elliot. - Oh, God.
- Pussy Tycoon. - These are movies
that came out this year? - Movies, TV shows, and games.
- Are you going to specify which one this one is?
- No - Oh.
- Cat Cash. Cat Shop.
- That show you've... Here's a hint. Here's a hint.
You will know what this is. - Oh, nice.
- Yeah. - I really don't know.
- I'll help you whittle it down a bit. It's a TV show.
- "Tiger King". - "Tiger King".
- Fuck. - All right, Eddie.
- Yeah?
- Tremendous Colonial Heat Competition.
- Tremendous Colonial Heat Competition. Um.
Hot. - It's really breaking you.
- Hot, warm, sun, sun, sun, Sunday.
- My son. (laughing)
- If I'd known this was going to upset you so much.
- Tremendous, what? - Colonial.
- Colonial? Big White Man Summer Games.
- My favorite TV show. - Kinda, yeah,
but no.
Okay, fine.
How about I simplify it a bit more.
Brilliant Empire Cook Games. - "Great British Bake-Off".
- (laughing) The sadness.
The sadness in you. - All right, well done.
You got me. - I don't want to get you.
I take no joy in this. Women of Victims.
- Is that a statement? - Women of Victims.
- Sonic the Hedgehog. - No.
- Oh. - "Birds of Prey"?
- Correct. - Oh.
- Oh. - That was this year?
- Yeah, January. - Oh, that hurts.
- Yeah, it's not good. It's a bad touch.
Eddie. - Yes?
- Sensual the Bush Pig. - Jeez, fuck.
Fuck, man. Sensual The Bush Pig.
- You'll never guess. - What the fuck?
Fuck, is it "Birds of Prey"?
- Ah, you got it wrong. No point for Eddie.
- Is it "Sonic the Hedgehog"?
- It's Sonic the Hedgehog, the only superhero movie of 2020.
- That was really funny, but yeah, she took me a minute.
(group laughing)
I was like, they're really having fun here.
I don't even know what it is.
- Because we're laughing at you.
Elliot. - Hi.
- Bestial Junction Contemporary Skylines.
- "Animal Crossing: New Horizons".
- Very good. (clapping)
I've realized I fucked this up.
- You have, Tom.
- Surveillance Bitch Horde. - That's good.
That's very good. You did well.
You did well on researching on this one.
- I did. I did it on a stream.
- That I accidentally tuned into.
- Hopefully not during this exact moment.
- It was this exact moment.
- Oh, no.
- And Tom should've given this question to Elliot,
and he realized this after the fact.
Tom, is it "Watch Dogs Legion"?
- It is "Watch Dogs Legion".
- I don't deserve a point.
- We could have talked about Surveillance Bitch Horde
a lot more, because I like saying it.
- That's a great title. You did a lot of work on that one.
- I want to play Surveillance Bitch Horde.
All right, boys.
We're going to jump back in time.
We're going to bibbidi bobbidi boo.
(Elliot speaking gibberish)
- How far back have we gone? Have we gone to Jazz World?
- Oh, no, I never stopped him. He's still going.
Boys, let's do We're Bad Friends.
Do you remember the game, We're Bad Friends?
- Nope.
- Basically I give you one truth and one lie about myself
and you have to figure out which is which.
I'll allow you to ask me one question about each thing I say
to determine the true true.
- We shall find the true true within you.
- In the Brexit referendum, I voted remain,
and also I have been punched by a fan.
- You would stand by remain, but I guess the question is,
did you vote?
And punched by a fan sounds extremely likely.
- Wow.
- I mean 'cause you have a lot of fans.
- You're very punchable. (laughing)
- Fuck me, I guess.
- If you're already...
I can't say, did you vote on the Brexit referendum
because that will probably just give away the whole thing.
- I can lie about the lie. - Oh, you can still lie?
- The question could just be, is this true
and I'll be like, well, no.
- Tell me about your voting day. What was your day?
Tell me the day. Paint me a picture.
- Well, I went to my local polling station.
I didn't take a picture with the dog,
'cause I didn't have the dog yet, and then I vote.
That was it. I just went to the polling station.
I voted. - And the punching of the fan.
Where did that take place? - The Excel.
For a freebie, I'll give you a little bit more.
It was at MCM.
- (laughing) From the weird set up,
from the fact that you've thrown in the Brexit remain,
that sounds like such an obvious truth.
It compels me to think that you...
It's not that you didn't vote remain.
I think you didn't vote.
So I'm going to vote for punched by a fan.
- You are correct. I have been punched by a fan.
- Yes. - I was punched by a fan.
I think it there must have been like at 2012 MCM.
I was a bit too banterous
and they punched me in the stomach.
- Oh. - And yes, you are correct.
I didn't vote in the referendum
because I was not in the country
and I fucked up getting my mail-in ballot.
- We were at VCON. - As did you.
- No, I did my mail-in ballot.
- Yeah, well, I fucked mine up, Elliot. You didn't.
- No. - Fuck.
- I've slapped two horses
and also there is a cock ring currently on my body.
- The game is afoot. - Maybe it's on my foot.
You don't know. - Oh.
Where is the cock ring on your body?
- The cock ring is in my underwear.
- Oh.
- And why did you slap the horses?
- Fat ass.
- Both of them? - Yes.
Have you never seen a horse's ass?
- I have. - It's slappable.
- Yeah, I fully believe both of these
but I'm going to go with the fact,
I think you've got a cock ring in your underpants.
- I don't.
- Because I know we have a cock ring in this vicinity.
- Many. - Many?
- Yeah, there's like three in this room right now.
- Oh. - Yeah.
- There's three of us. - That's the next challenge.
(group laughing)
- Okay, boys, the next challenge
is you've got to put a cock ring on the other.
Task Master.
- No hands. - All right,
Eddie, you know the rules and so do I.
Elliot's going to put on some head bones
and you're gonna say words at him.
He got to figure out what them words are.
Round one. - Baby Yoda
is a sex criminal. - Baby Yoda.
- Is a sex criminal. - Is in big trouble.
- Oh, he is.
Baby Yoda is a sex criminal.
- Is inside my bum hole?
- We're really getting the full story here.
He's in big trouble.
- This is more context than I anticipated.
- I think I'd know. - Baby Yoda.
- Baby Yoda. - Is a sex criminal.
- Excited? - He would be, yeah.
To be in his butt hole and all. Sex.
Sex. - Yes, yes, yes.
Criminal. Criminal.
- Cinnamon. - He's a sex cinnamon.
- A sex criminal? - Yes,
baby Yoda is a sex criminal.
- It's me time. - Me time.
- Yay, there's no way he's going to get this one. (laughing)
- He might.
- Da Vinky painted the Mona Lisa.
- Very big sister.
- Oh, I don't know how to react to that.
- No.
- Da Vinky painted the Mona Lisa.
- Very big sad sister.
- Oh no, it's getting worse.
- Da Vinky painted the Mona Lisa.
- Very big small sister. - Where's he going?
- I guess, Da Vinky? - Cookie.
- Da Vinky? - Groovy.
- Da Vinky? Da Vinky?
(group laughing)
- Why are we like this? - Da Vinky?
(group laughing)
- Skate fast, wear a mask, eat ass.
- I saw a mask. - Skate fast.
- Dead farts.
(group laughing)
- Skate fast.
- Stay inside? - Wear a mask.
- Wear a mask. - Eat ass.
- Eat ass is the end one.
So I've got two. I've got wear a mask and eat ass.
- I think we have to call it.
I think he's had...
What is that? - Oh, skate fast.
- Yeah. - Skate fast, wear a mask,
eat ass.
I wasn't helped at all.
- Eddie only demolished half of the fucking office.
- This video is sponsored by Surfshark VPN.
- No. - It is.
- I disagree with what you're saying.
- It's not up for debate. - I don't think we're allowed
to say that.
A VPN guarantees your privacy, security
and anonymity online. - This is a long sentence.
- Anonymity. - Anomymity.
- Anonymity. - I can't say that word.
Anomymity. - Anominousness.
- Anonymity.
You can access content or even information
not available in your country.
- You can have it sorted or, as you can imagine,
have it not sorted. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
You could, but if you had Surfshark VPN,
you'd have it sorted.
- Five? How many are there?
Let me go. - No.
- Sign up to Surfshark. - Take a photograph.
- Using code, darksquidge. - Do your stretches.
- You should do your stretches everybody.
- That's true. - To get 83% off.
- Take your clothes off. - That's just rude.
And three months extra free. - Everybody else dance.
- And three months extra free.
- And moved to the beat. - (laughing) This is good.
It's good, you can take them off. (laughing)
- Fuck. Why was that so much?
- Boys, when the internot...
- Internot? - Shit. (laughing)
Too right. It should be an internot.
- Yeah, whoa. It makes you think.
- That's my presidential slogan.
- Internet? No, internot.
Boys, the internet's a terrible place, an absolute mistake,
and it's full of horny, disgusting goblins.
- I can confirm this, yes.
- How do you know? - I'm there.
- I traversed the crevices of the internet, the sweaty,
moist, unwatched crevices,
to find some of the strangest porn I possibly could,
and the question I'm going to present to you is
what is there more porn of?
Guinness or door handles?
- They're called knobs for a reason.
- No, this isn't door knobs. This is door handles.
- So you'd have to be coming in from the side.
- I do have to make that differentiation
because there was a different amount of results
for door knobs versus door handles.
- I'm going to say that there is more porn
of the door handles, than the Guinness.
- I could see someone trying to fuck a door handle.
- Well, boys, just for a bit of context,
here is the result for a sexy door handle.
- Oh. - Honestly, quite nice.
- It's quite classy.
- I can see that in a mansion and you won't know.
- Yeah, you wouldn't notice, and then suddenly you--
- Subtle.
- You realize you're pulling down on a cock door handle,
inside of a labia frame.
- Yeah, it's like meeting the vagina,
when it goes all the way down.
- I like the up balls. - Mm.
(group laughing)
- Here's one I found for Guinness.
- That took a whole five minutes to make, didn't it?
- They added the cock to the logo.
- So what? That froth looks like cum?
- Someone thought that frothy white could be cum.
I am very sad to announce, boys, that you are again wrong.
There was three results for Guinness,
including an anthropomorphized character,
and only one for door handle.
That was it. That was the one door handle.
- And you didn't print out the character?
- I didn't want to. - Okay.
- My question for you is,
is there more porn of the little mascot
inside the Ikea manuals or is there more porn of Nutella,
the chocolate, hazelnut spread?
- I can see someone fucking Nutella.
- You need to start thinking about it in terms
of could you fuck this thing, more of would someone,
somehow, draw porn of this thing?
- I want to know how hot this Ikea man is.
- So here's the Ikea man. - Oh.
- Oh, okay. - Here he is,
fucking a (indistinct).
He's fucking exact kind of, what?
Yeah, he's fucking exactly what is behind you right now.
- Look out, Elliot. - There has to be
a more satisfying Ikea thing to fuck.
- Where's he getting the friction?
- So he's just whacking it against...
- Yeah. - Yeah.
- Yeah, this is more of just a contact-based orgasm.
- I missed that page in the building guide.
I'm going to vote for Nutella.
I think there's more porn of the Nutella
because it's exclusively about the Ikea man,
not the Ikea woman.
- I'm going to go Ikea man.
- Well, I'm very happy to say
that someone's finally got it right and it was Elliot.
- Yay. - There is more porn
of the little Ikea man, with three results,
than there is of Nutella, who only had two.
- What was the fucking Nutella?
(Eddie laughing)
Oh, I see. I didn't think about the Nutella fucking me.
- It's just nutt. It's just nutt.
- Yeah, it's a nutt. - With two T's.
- Nutt.
We talked about rule 34, but the last game I'd like to play
will involve creating some rule 34.
- Oh, boy. - Of our own.
Specifically, my own.
However, you will have to guess
what I am drawing rule 34 of. - Is it Kinktionary?
- It's Kinktionary.
- It's time to Think that Kink.
- Think that Kink. Play the theme song.
(upbeat music)
Count me down for 10 seconds and I'll get to work I guess.
- 10, nine, eight, seven, six,
five, four, three, two, one.
(Elliot and Eddie imitates alarm clock)
- Tom. - I needed more time.
Boys, what have I drawn here?
- That's just a deformed little boy with his penis.
- You're very correct, to be fair.
- It's like frog feet? Is that a factor?
It's like webbed feet. - Is it that boy?
- Both on the very close track.
- Is it Like a duck. - Crazy Frog?
- It is Crazy Frog. - It's Crazy Frog.
I forgot... I think he's wearing a little helmet thing?
- It's like a helmet, yeah.
- I didn't do the straps.
That's why I was devastated I didn't have time for that.
- Well, I don't know what the kink is
but he's got nasty legs. - He's got broken Legs.
- I'm just bad at drawing. - Oh.
- Crazy Frog foot fetish.
- Oh. - His feet are big.
He's got big...
We're looking at his feet.
They're always quite big
but I couldn't make them any bigger.
I panicked.
I had time for this one and then...
- I like the slab. The cleaver.
- Oh, I got this one. I fucking nailed this one, lads.
- Oh. - Smashed it, to be honest.
- That is a ball gag in a Pringle man.
- You are correct. It is Pringles BDSM.
- I'm guessing we just go for it.
- Oh, you gotta run in. You gotta jump.
You gotta take it.
- You've got to seize those opportunities.
- I didn't think how easy it would be to draw Pringles BDSM,
but turns out it's very easy.
This one didn't go as well, I'll be honest.
- Pikachu shit in the bucket. - Close.
- You're right with the Pika. - What's another Pika?
- Pikachu. (laughing)
- Detective Pikachu? - No.
- Batman? Pikaman?
What's a Pikaman? - What's a Pikaman?
- From the Smash Bros. - Pikmin?
- No, Pikaman. - So it's Pikaman scat?
- No. - Cake fart.
- Cake fart. - Elliot gets it.
Elliot gets the point. Is Pikaman cake fart.
(group laughing)
I'm proud of this one. It's a masterpiece.
- Oh. - Okay?
- Doc, cat. - It's the penguin
from "Wallace and Gromit"? - Wrong.
- It's not Feathers McGraw? - It's not Feathers McGraw.
- It's not Donald Duck? - It is not Donald Duck.
- It is a duck though? - It's not a duck.
- Oh. - Is it not a beak,
it's a nose? - It is a nose, yes.
- Okay, so it's a human man. Is it Popeye?
- No. - Is it Postman Pat,
who's eating his cat? - Close.
- Oh, that's really good.
- I wanted the word vore,
but I will give you the point nonetheless.
- I'd say he definitely got that. Yes.
- All right, boys. Let me tally up the scores.
You have both drawn. - What have we drawn?
- I thought you were drawing.
(group laughing)
- I wasn't prepared for japes.
There's no jokes in this series.
So congratulations, while I am, again, obviously,
first place of "Content", you are both joint second.
- Wow. - Yay.
- Congratulations. - Making you both the losers.
- A good show, sir. Good show.
- Wow, wibbidi wobbidi woo.
- That's it, it's over. - Yeah, it's done.
That was "Content", boys. - Deleting the channel now.
- No, we're not. Please don't unsubscribe.
I need you. - But it's not the end
of the channel because we got a new thing on the way, right?
- No, currently we do not. - Not right now, but we will.
- Why are you lying? - Don't make promises
that I'm not prepared to keep.
Thank you, everyone, for watching these silly videos.
We're going to make some new things in the future.
Don't know what it is yet, but we'll figure it out.
It will probably look the same as this shit but--
- With a different name.
- With a just arbitrarily different name.
- Suggest things in the comment.
- I won't read them.
- It's great for analytics. - Yeah.
- You notice the fan art scrolling by on the screen?
They've been doing that for a little while,
and also here are the most recent videos,
"Content" playlist, contents on the playlist.
Look at them. Say good night, boys.
- Good night. - Good night.
- Or good morning. - What if it's the morning?
- Oh, fuck.
- What if we only get one fan art
and there's just been more in there.
- I've been Thomas TomSka Ridgewell.
- I've been Elliot Gough.
- And I've been Eddie Bowley.
- And this has been - "Content".