If you just found this video, you're probably wondering how to manage teen
pregnancy. You know what? I've done another video for the parents of teens
who are pregnant. This one is for you. I've got some tips for you. If you're a
teenager and you're dealing with a pregnancy right now, whether it's you
that's pregnant or your girlfriend that's pregnant this one is for you. If
you're a parent watching this, that's fine. You can listen it. But this isn't
for you. I did another video just for you about
parenting a pregnant teenager. You might want to click on over to that one. And
then we'll have a conversation here just with you teenagers, okay? This is a tough
thing. And there's some bad news and there's some good news. The bad news
first? Are you up for that? Okay, here we go.
Brace yourself, this is hard. You're like, "Oh, thanks Dr. Paul. Tell me something I
didn't know." Yeah, it's hard. And there are some hard things about this that we just
can't get around. We're going to have to face them. We're going to have to take it on.
And it's not a bad thing that it's hard. It's just hard. Some of the reasons for
that are kind of obvious. Because you are now responsible for another human being.
This is a big deal. And you might remember back in school. Do you remember when
they had to take care of the little mechanical baby. Or in my day, it was a
sack of flour that we had to pack around. A 10-pound bag of flour and we had to
take care of this thing as if it was a baby. And you remember some of those
things maybe from school. Well, this is the real deal.
Everything changes. Your body, your relationships, your activities. All of
those things get to change. And again, it's not a bad thing that this is hard.
It's just hard. And I offer you all of the empathy and
compassion and support that I can muster because I know that it's hard. Now, that's
the bad news. Okay, how you doing? Alright?
Yeah. You kind of already knew that this was hard.
So, I'm stating the obvious at this point. Let's get to the good news, okay? Because
that's what you're here for. The good news is you can handle this.
You've got this. I know that totally goes contrary to some things that you might
be thinking. You've got what it takes to do this, to handle this. This is not the
first time, it's not the last time that this will happen to people like you. Good
people. And has your empathy come up a little bit? You know what you used to
think about teenage pregnancy? You know, it's kind of that taboo. It's like, "Ooh,
they're kind of..." Yeah. Let's get rid of the judgment. This happens to really good
people like you, okay? So, we'll get past all of that judgment and just get
focused on the good news. You are surrounded by resources. It may not
always feel that way. Especially if you don't have a supportive family or
immediate support group. You've got resources all around you that you're
probably not even aware of. And as you deal with this new development in your
own life, you'll become more aware of what those resources are. There are
things in your community, there are clinics and doctors and counselors and
social workers who have all dealt with this before.
They know the ropes. They've been there. They've helped people just like you to
get through this. To find the connections that they need to have. To set in place
all of the plans and preparations and everything that needs to happen. To
consider your different options. They're there. These resources exist. Let's talk
about a couple of different levels of those resources so that you can be very
conscious and aware of that. First and foremost. It's you. It's you. You have
knowledge. You have experience, you have brains in your head and you got
feet in your shoes. And you have some really great resources to handle
everything that's coming up. Never ever discount yourself. You've got
this. And you have some amazing talents and skills and knowledge that will carry
you right through all of the difficult things that you get to do right now. So,
remember that, will you? Tied right into that is your ability to make good
decisions. I know, there's this whole obvious thing about, "Well what about that
one?" Yeah, I know. Things happen, okay? We all make mistakes, we all get into
positions that we didn't anticipate being in. And maybe even if you plan to
be in this place, it's still fairly overwhelming. But here's my point. You
have the ability to make good decisions. To choose well for you. Don't rely on
anyone or anything else to make all those decisions for you. This is you. You
have a responsibility to make good decisions for yourself. You'll have
people who offer their opinions and please consider those. Especially from
people who love you and who are invested in your success and well-being. Even with
all of the opinions that are there. It's you that has the ability to make the
best decisions for you about the things that you're facing right now. Tune in to
that. You've got the ability to make good decisions for you. Now, let's go to the
next level. If you think of this kind of like a target. And right there at
the center of the target is you. Then as we move out, that next ring closest to
you is your family, your boyfriend or girlfriend or spouse or significant
other that's... Usually there's 2 people involved when there's a teenage
pregnancy. So, you know who I'm talking about. These are the people in your
immediate circle right outside of you that becomes a support and a resource
for you. Now, here's a little warning. This kind of event or development
tends to tip people over sometimes. So, be really patient and tolerant and
compassionate about those people in your outer circle who might be having their
own emotional reactions to all of this, okay? Mom and Dad, for example. Probably
not what they had in mind for you at this point of life. It is what it is and
they're going to come to terms with that and they're going to be there for you and
love you. If they watch that other video I told you about earlier. Because they
love you, they will also feel a lot of emotional connection to what's going on.
And that might come across initially as them being a little tipped over by the
whole thing. So, give them some time, okay? They're adjusting to all of this as well.
They are an enormous resource to you. They have experienced that you don't
have. They have some connections that you might not even be aware of. So, whatever
you can do to strengthen the relationship outside of yourself, we get
out to that next ring of the target. Those people around you build
those relationships, keep the communication lines open. Seek their
counsel and advice. They're probably already eager and willing to share it.
And that can be kind of annoying sometimes but just be open to that, okay?
Because they really do care about you and they want the best things for you.
Now, if it's not your family, if you're in a situation where you don't have those
supportive parents on board. Then we reach out a little farther to then
the immediate family. And we go into friends and people in your community,
people in your church, people in a support group that you belong to. Also
professionals. So, now we're we're broadening this out even farther now. So,
we reach out to professionals. There are social workers, there are agencies, there
are doctors, there are clinics who know this stuff. And you can expand out to all
of those levels of resource. Starting with yourself at the core moving out
to family and then friends and community and agencies and the whole society that
we have built here. We want you to succeed, okay? I don't even know you
personally. It feels kind of like we know each other because we're here on YouTube.
But even though I don't even know you personally, it's good for me if you
succeed. I want you to succeed and everybody around you wants that as well.
So, it's amazing how much compassion and support and empathy that you're going to
find as you reach out and be open to all of those different levels of support and
help. Okay. Now let's get practical for a minute.
Because you're going to need to take care of a few things. In the bad news section
I mentioned that you're responsible for another human being at this point and
that can be kind of heavy. You've got to take care of a few things. And first and
foremost, you got to take care of you. You have to. Have you ever been on an
airplane? You know when you're flying on an airplane and they go through the
little safety routine. And if you lose cabin pressure, it's a pressurized cabin
in there. These oxygen masks will fall from the ceiling and you're supposed to
fasten it on with a little rubber band. And they say if you're traveling with
someone else or with young children or someone who needs assistance, put your
own mask on first. And then assist the person that you're traveling with. Why do
they say that? Because it's easy to get distracted by all the people and things
you have to take care of. Your number-one priority is to take care of you. And if
you are pregnant, it means that your body has certain needs that it doesn't
normally have. Now, there's all the predictable stuff. You know, like sleep
and exercise and a good diet. But when you're pregnant, the changes that are
happening in your body mean that you need a certain additional kind of
support and help. So, getting a little prenatal care for example can go a long
way to educating you about what your body needs and
how to take care of yourself. So, reach out and be open to that. I already
mentioned the resources that are available all around you. Another thing
you get to take care of is your team. Build those relationships, keep the
communication open. Reach out to and be willing to receive help from all of
those supportive people around you. Find them, take care of that team. As you take
care of yourself and you take care of your body and you
take care of your prenatal needs and you take care of your team, these things will
put you in position to take the very best care of your baby. And that's a
person who needs your help and support. You are the primary resource for that
little person. So, it's huge. Its enormously important that you take care of those
things and put yourself in that position. Let's focus on the good news, okay?
Because you've got this. You've got people around you and support available
to you that you may not even be aware of. Keep the confidence that you're going to
move through this. You're going to find what you need to find. You're going to do
okay. So honored to be on your team. Thank you for being here. Stick around. We've
got other videos that can help you. Make sure you're subscribed.