"Does Laptop Wi-Fi Lower Sperm Counts?"
It is impossible to imagine a modern socially active man
who does not use cell phones and Wi-Fi.
Might that be harmful for male fertility?
In my last video, I talked about how the sperm of men who use Wi-Fi
tend to not be getting along as swimmingly well,
but that was an observational study.
We don't really know if Wi-Fi
actually damages sperm until you put it to the test.
The title kind of gives it all away, but basically this was the first study
to evaluate the direct impact of laptop use on human sperm.
Here's the DNA fragmentation in samples near and far away from a laptop
with an active Wi-Fi connection, suggesting one might not want to position
a Wi-Fi device near the male reproductive organs.
Yeah, Wi-Fi exposure may decrease human sperm motility
and increase sperm DNA fragmentation, but the effect is minor.
I mean, is having 10% fewer good swimmers really going to make a difference?
I mean, fertile men release hundreds of millions.
What has yet to be done is a study looking at bouncing baby endpoints:
do men randomized to a certain exposure have a tougher time having children?
It's actually a harder study to perform than one might think.
You can't just have men avoid cell phones and laptops for a day.
Yes, we make millions of new sperm a day, but they take months to mature.
The sperm with which you conceive today
started as a preconceived notion months before.
So you can imagine why such a study has yet to be done.
You'd have to randomize men
to essentially avoid wireless communications completely,
or maybe come up with some kind of Faraday cage underwear.
Another reason why one may not want to use a laptop computer on your lap
is just the heat generated by the laptop itself, Wi-Fi or not,
can warm men's scrotums, undermining the whole point
of scrotum possession in the first place.
This all dates back to a famous series of experiments back in 1968.
It was an illuminating study, one might say.
Sometimes they'd add a reflector to boost the heat, though the bulb alone
was just as effective, but they had to move it closer to the skin.
Much simpler, but more likely to result in a Jerry Lee Lewis song.
[Jerry Lee Lewis sings "Great Balls of Fire."]
But now we have nice cool fluorescents,
but heated car seats remain a testicular heat stress factor.
Saunas aren't a good idea for men trying to conceive.
Sperm counts before and after,
apparently cutting sperm production in half,
and still down 3 months later, but apparent full recovery by 6 months.
But that's why boxers not briefs, or go all commando.
Who makes money on that though?
That's why we need a scrotal cooling device industry,
though this review noted that more acceptable scrotal cooling techniques
really need to be developed.
Why? Whatever are they referring to?
It seems the devices currently on the market are not so practical day-to-day.
There's the curved rubber collar filled with ice cubes.
Another was just like a freezer gel pack
inserted in the guys' underwear every night.
Not to worry though, it thaws in 3 to 4 hours, tops.
Holy Snowballs, Batman!
Do not, I repeat, do not put an ice pack on your scrotum.
A few frozen peas and carrots and you can frostbite yourself.
See, sometimes even vegetables can be bad for you.
Then there's the schvitzer that keeps the scrotum damp,
and finally, attached with a belt,
achievement of scrotal cooling with a continuous air stream.
With so many options to choose from,
do laptop users really need protection from scrotal hyperthermia?
You don't know until you put it to the test.
And indeed, an increase in scrotal temperature
was found in laptop computer users,
scrotal temperatures up a feverish 5 degrees Fahrenheit.
A little scrotal warmth doesn't sound that bad, though.
Then I read this case report: a previously healthy 50-year-old scientist
typing out a report one evening, sitting comfortably in his favorite chair,
laptop in lap, but woke up the next day with blisters,
penile and scrotal blisters that then broke
and developed into infected wounds that caused extensive oozing pus.
Even third-degree burns have been reported,
requiring surgical intervention with skin grafts.
The guy drank 12 units of vodka
and passed out while watching a film on his lap,
and the laptop burned through his leg.
The surgeons call for a public education campaign to educate the public
against the risks of using a laptop in its most literal sense.
Uh, how about instead educating the public
against drinking 12 units of vodka?