This channel is evidence.
[pop music]
Hey everyone.
It's me, Hallease, endeavoring to persevere as always.
If you're new here, I make videos about my chaotic good life.
Subscribe, follow, social media.
All the things.
This video is actually part of my Monday Motivations which are usually just exclusive to my Patreon
producers: patreon.com/hallease.
But every now and then I open 'em up to everybody.
And usually I just talk about either a question a Patreon producer's asked, or I talk about
just what I'm planning on doing that week.
So, that Monday Motivation gets you kinda goin'.
Here's what I'm about, here's what I'm trying to figure out.
Question for you.
Stuff like that.
In this one, I wanted to answer a question that I get asked.
I'm starting to get asked, too, a little bit more.
People will ask, you know, "Why'd you start your YouTube channel?
What got you into this?
What'd you start that channel for, Hallease?"
You know [laughs].
I usually answer this question when it is asked in a very abbreviated way.
And just for the sake of brevity.
It's not an untrue answer, but it's just not the full answer.
So, when people usually ask me, "Hallease, why did you start a YouTube channel?"
I usually say two things: 1.
I wanted a creative outlet.
Which is true.
At the time, I worked for a video agency full-time.
And I wanted just something else to keep my creativity flowing.
Which is true.
And 2.
To tell my own story.
Which is also true.
definitely.
That's why I say I'm documenting my chaotic good life.
So, I mean, at its core, it's a vlog channel.
You know I'm sayin'?
At its core.
If you're gonna dumb it down, it's a vlog channel.
To expand on that second part.
I wanted to tell my own story.
I went through a paradigm shift in that, and that moment, that time period during that
paradigm shift is what made me want to start telling my own story.
So, I've been on YouTube as a consumer, maybe like you, since 2009 ... Or, I guess as a
viewer, since 2008, 2009.
During the natural hair movement, I had my first set of locs.
And had no clue what I was doing.
And I really relied heavily on the YouTube community of people who were documenting their
hair journeys.
And I would post things but it as again as a viewer.
It was to try to solicit an answer to a question that I hadn't seen someone else answer yet
about my hair or just about hair in general.
I was not trying to be the authority on anything, or anything like that.
I was just like, "Could someone please answer my question please?"
[laughs] and that was how I participated in YouTube.
It was around 2015 ... 2014, 2015, 2016.
That time period is when my paradigm shift happened, and when I started consciously thinking
and saying, "I need to tell my own story."
Leading up to it Trayvon Martin, Tamir Rice, and then during it Michael Brown, Sandra Bland.
And specifically the very pivotal, pivotal moment being the Ferguson protests.
It was interesting because it was this amazing culmination of technology and what was happening.
Right around that time, we started having really consistent, decent quality livestreams.
Iono ... is Periscope still around?
Is Periscope still a thing?
I don't know.
Did Twitter just buy it?
I don't know.
But we started having livestreams.
Those were a thing.
The cell phone camera technology had improved enough to where livestreams weren't bad [laughs]
anymore.
If you had a battery back, you could go live for a while.
And so, I watched the livestreams of the Ferguson protests happening.
In the beginning, I watched them and then I would watch the news or listen to the news,
and no one was talking about it.
And that blew my mind.
That simple truth blew my mind.
But then there came a shift where I would watch the livestreams and then I would watch
the news and the way they didn't align.
The thing about a livestream, at least then is ... and even now, there's a level of authenticity
with a livestream.
'Cause there's no commentary usually.
And even if there is, there's someone just trying to set up a scene and let you know
what's going on.
And then they just film.
Right?
In a livestream, it's just what's happening.
Real-time, here's what's happening.
With a news segment, there's commentary.
There's voice, there's character, there's tenacity, there's whatever.
And so, the blatant juxtaposition of the two, that blew my mind.
And it was in that moment of seeing that juxtaposition and seeing how they clashed that I realized,
"Oh, I cannot let other people tell my story for me anymore.
I refuse to let other people tell my story because they will tell it wrong."
And that is when I started posting more consistently [laughs] here on this channel.
This channel, and I've said this in a film I made maybe a few years back, this channel
is evidence.
This channel is evidence of my existence.
It's evidence of the life I lived.
It's evidence of me.
So, that way, if I ever become a hashtag, no one can say anything.
No one can contradict my account of my life because it's here.
For you, for everyone, for the world to see, that I existed in all of my complexity.
This channel is proof of my black experience.
Um.
Yeah.
That's why I do this.
It's evidence.
And I'm grateful.
I'm grateful that for whatever reason my evidence of my existence vibes with you.
I'm grateful that there's something about me and my life that you can relate to, that
you can confide in, that you can engage with, with me.
I do not take it for granted, the fact that I have your eyes, and your ears, or if you're
reading the closed captions, the closed caption.
I'm so grateful that I have you here.
You know I'm saying?
I'm grateful that I can help you slow down sometimes.
I'm grateful that I can talk to you about simple things.
A plant that I can't seem to keep alive [laughs].
Or more serious things.
What it means to be a woman who's married.
What it means to be an aunt.
What it means to be a daughter.
What it means to explore feelings of unworthiness or feelings of worthiness, you know?
I'm so grateful that I can share with you, and you can gain, if anything, gain something,
anything from my successes, my failures.
I'm grateful that I can show you the full scope of what a life is here.
And yeah, I don't take it for granted that you watch at all.
I'm very aware, and grateful to you.
So, yeah.
I just wanted to let you know.
You know?
That's why I make videos here, is so I can have proof.
So, you can know that I was here.
Hallease was here.
Living a chaotic good life.
Anyway, that's me.
Again, these Monday Motivations are for the Patreon producers just keep it really straightforward
with 'em.
Don't usually do too much extra, 'cause I just wanna talk, just wanna talk to them,
and just be real.
You know I mean?
So, if you're interested in this, check it out.
Definitely no pressure on that, though.
'Cause times is hard.
In regards to your week, you know, as always Patreon producers know this for watching these,
but as always, I want you to have the most fulfilling week you can possibly have.
I wish nothing but successes from you, productivity for you, rest for you, you know?
If you need to check out, I hope you can check out so you can check in with yourself.
Yes.
I want that for everybody.
So, yeah.
I hope you have a good week.
I really do.
Patreon producers, I'll see you next week.
But everyone else, I'll see you when I see you.