(Scary Music)
Ian: "SHUT UP!"
Anthony: "'Teddy bears and other toys kill more people than real bears'."
Anthony: "Riiight."
(Upbeat music)
(More upbeat music)
Anthony: "Yesss...."
Anthony: "Hey."
Ian: "Hey. So, I finally got that clone machine working."
(screams)
Anthony: "It's trying to kill me!"
Ian: "You've been reading those OMG Facts again, haven't you?"
Anthony: "They're TRUE facts!"
Ian: "Oh no! Ah, help! Help! The teddy bear's stabbing me, oh no!"
Ian: "Oh, heh, well... while you're playing with your little teddy bear, I got a hot girl to talk to! Her name is Ashley... heh..."
Anthony: "Is it your mom?"
Ian: "NO! Hmph..."
Ian: "No, I didn't pack any underwear! I'm only going to be here for a couple hours! Yeah, bye, Ashley!"
Ian: "Nice try, Anthony!"
TV: "To confuse your assailant, try a random word or phrase like, 'I have diarrhea'!"
TV: "Huh?"
TV: "Now you try!"
TV: "I have diarrhea!"
Anthony: "I have diarrhea."
TV: "Again!"
Anthony: "I have diarrhea!"
(Scream of absolute terror.)
Anthony: "Okay, man, I get it. You don't have to keep making fun of me!"
(Decapitatiiiooonnnn!)
(screams)
Anthony: "I HAVE DIARRHEA!"
Anthony: "I have diar-"
Sensei: "Silence!" (B**ch slap)
Sensei: "Defeating the teddy bear is simple. All you have to do is-ahhh!"
Sensei: "Oh, nooo! Javelin! Damn you, teddy bear!"
Sensei: "Listen... tell my cats that I love them... and that I miss them..."
Anthony: "Just tell me how to defeat the teddy bear!"
Sensei: "I'm so sorry... but my last dying words can only be 140 characters long! Yup, all up!"
GTA V Cop: "Get back! Stop right there, teddy bear! Oh God... he's controlling my MIND! NO! NOT DOWN THERE! I MAKE BABIES WITH THAT! OWW MY WIENER!!!"
Anthony: "Get away from me!"
(Mysterious laughing)
Ian: "GOT YOU!"
(All get up and start laughing)
Ian: "I get you with my clones EVERY TIME!"
Anthony: "What about the teddy bear?"
'Teddy Bear': "Midget clone!"
GTA V Cop: "Guys, I really shot my wiener off."
To see the full self-defense video,
starring KassemG,
go to smosh.com.
- Today, I'm gonna show you how to
repel bad guys.
- Also,
check out the OMG Facts official YouTube channel, and watch Smosh present an OMG Fact.
It'll make you say, "OMG!" Or at least, "That's a very
interesting fact!" And thank you for subscribing.
Brings great honor to my family, especially my grandma, 'cause she likes
YouTube. She has YouTube channel: youtube.com/grandmaofsamuraiwoman2357justinbieber.