Love black music, man.
Hits you, you know.
That's why I have--
That's why I have a hard time going to see
civil rights movies.
I have to go see civil right movies
in the middle of the day
so nobody can see me crying.
'Cause them movies be hitting you, man.
Civil rights movies get me with that Negro humming.
Oh, my God, I break down.
'Cause you know, every civil rights movie just got
that scene where it's just some humming.
♪ Freedom ♪
(humming)
You tell me that don't break you down,
in the middle of a civil rights movie, just that humming?
There don't even be nothing serious happening on screen,
I be crying.
It's just a dude putting butter on a waffle, and just...
(humming)
♪ Freedom ♪
(humming continues)
You be in the theater bawling.
"He was just putting butter on the waffle!
They wouldn't let him, they wouldn't let him."
Civil rights movies get me all the time, man.
They get me with that humming, and then they always
make black people fall in slow motion.
Yo, every civil rights movie, a black person fall in slow--
Why you got to slow down my pain?
Just play it at regular speed.
Any time a black person falls in a civil rights movie,
they fall, then they do that double bounce in the dirt
and the dirt come up.
"Get out of here, darkie! Just get out!"
"Ohhh!"
Pfft! Pfft!
(cheers and applause)
Don't do that to me.
Most powerful civil rights movie scene
of all time is "Selma".
I can name the scene.
It's when Oprah Winfrey got slapped.
This dude slapped the fire-- It was the second time,
not the first time she got slapped, the second time.
This dude slapped Oprah Winfrey so hard,
she fell in slow motion and there was Negro humming.
I left the theater.
I couldn't even tell you how the movie ended.
It was too powerful. My emotions.
First of all, Oprah couldn't have known
she was getting slapped.
She didn't know.
She didn't know she was getting slapped.
That dude-- That was Ava DuVernay,
that was the director, she made that choice.
That's a good-ass director,
Ava DuVernay went up to that actor between scenes.
"Okay, we love what you're doing, okay?
"We're getting a lot of good stuff from you.
"We're just gonna change it up this scene.
"Okay, this time, this time,
"Oprah's gonna come over, okay?
"She's gonna do her lines, and Oprah,
"she finishes her lines, you slap the shit out, just--
slap Oprah."
"Does Oprah know?"
"No, do what I tell you! I'm Ava DuVernay!
Slap Oprah!"
Oprah came over to that dude, man.
You could see it in her face.
She didn't know that-- that slap was coming.
"We ain't leaving till we get our rights."
Skaboom!
♪ Oh, freedom ♪
(humming)
Pfft! Pfft!
The thing about this country is this:
We're all Americans. People love to say that.
That's the first thing people want to say when--
when there's some tension.
"Oh, we're all Americans.
"You're American and I'm American.
"Well, just, hell, we all Americans.
Can't we just be all Americans?"
Yeah, we are.
We all Americans.
But we live in two different Americas.
That's what it is.
People forget that.
And I don't think everybody that...
doesn't understand what we go through
is necessarily racist or bigoted.
That's-- That's a far jump.
It's a lot of folks that just straight up don't know
what it's like.
And you gotta educate 'em.
You gotta educate 'em on the kind of America you live in.
I had to go Best Buy and give a dude some straightening.
Straighten his ass out, yeah.
I'm straightening.
Dude at Best Buy gonna decide I don't need a bag
with my purchase.
"You just have an iPhone case.
I figure you could just pop that open."
No, I ain't popping shit. You put it in a bag.
I need that in a bag.
"What do you need a bag for?
"I don't understand why you need a bag.
"It's wasteful. Recycle.
Don't you care about the Earth?"
I go, "Sir, this has nothing to do with the Earth.
"I'm a black man in America.
I gotta leave this store with a bag, bro."
(cheers and applause)
It's about safety.
I'm black, I don't get the luxury of just walking out
with shit in my hand.
That is a roll of the dice.
That is a horrifying day if I--
No, not only do I need that bag, bitch,
I need that receipt!
And staple it to the outside.
I don't want a receipt in my hand.
You staple my receipt to the outside
like Chinese carryout,
and I'll hold it up in the air, I'll "Lion King"--
I'll "Hakuna Matata" an iPhone case
out of Best Buy.
And it's not his fault. He just didn't understand.
He thought he was saving the Earth,
but he was saving a life, that's what he was doing.
This has nothing to do with recycling, man.
'Cause, see, you might be a cool person.
He might-- The cashier might be a cool-ass dude,
but we don't know what the security guard
been through up front.
I come prancing out of Best Buy
with this naked-ass iPhone case in my hand.
And here comes security.
"Excuse me, sir. Did you pay for that?"
Oh, yeah, I got the receipt.
"He's going for a gun!" Skaboom!
♪ Oh, freedom, ohh ♪
Pfft! Pfft!
(cheers and applause)