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Going to the grocery store may be a necessary behavior in 2018, but in some countries that
are living in the future, all of their shopping can be done on a vending machine in the subway
ride home.
I mean, why interact with other humans for any kind of purchase?
It goes beyond groceries, too.
No more snacks, drinks, and quick fixes in these machines!
Whether you’re looking for a new pet, a, rather odd additive to your rice, an umbrella,
or even vegetables, these super weird vending machines are here to provide it for you.
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what type of vending machine you'd invent!
10.
Flying Fish Soup Anything that says “fish” or “flying”
on it does not belong in a vending machine.
I want a human hand to give me my salmon, my trout, and anything that may or may not
have flown at one point.
So, of course, this particular vending machine sets off my gag reflex.
This isn’t even just a flying fish in a bag, it’s flying fish soup in a bottle with
algae.
Apparently, it’s regularly used in Japan to flavor food and people will straight up
buy it from a vending machine closest to them.
This means someone’s mom is putting on her slippers, leaving the pot over easy, and walking
to the corner vending machine to pick up an extra bottle of flying fish juices.
Nice one, Japan.
9.
Umbrellas Now, this is something I can get behind!
Or under, I suppose.
Japan wins again with the umbrella vending machine.
Whether you’re fresh out of umbrellas because you lent yours to your friend who never returned
it, or just left yours in your other bag, this machine will save your day!
Unlike sneaky street salespeople who will increase the price of umbrellas as soon as
the storm rolls around… this vending machine has it ready for you anytime, and without
the markup!
Although I would deeply benefit from one of these as a serial umbrella forgetter, I think
it is also a deeply enabling machine that will never let me learn...
8.
Ramen Number eight is a vending machine that every
college in America should be investing in immediately.
In fact, we could probably cover tuition prices nationwide if only we put a Ramen vending
machine in every campus in the country.
Upcharge a quarter per pack for the convenience of not leaving your dorm floor and ba-da-bing!
You have yourself a business that makes money while you sleep and students drink!
Or study, or whatever kids in dorms do at night.
What’s better is that this isn’t your same, lame 90 cent ramen from the grocery
store.
No siree, this is punch-in-your-order-and-get-it hot and fresh like your upscale Japanese place
would make it for nine dollars.
7.
Surgical Masks This is definitely something that we might
have a hard time relating to.
In the United States, we take clean air for granted.
In countries like Japan and other countries in Asia, they suffer from air quality issues.
This is why people frequently wear surgical masks outdoors.
Whether they’re commuting or going to the store, it makes sense that vending machines
are selling their most highly-ticketed accessory in vending machines that cross your path during
your everyday journey.
These babies distribute masks for all situations, whether you’re avoiding pollen or the black
smoke coming from China.
6.
Puppies Cat cafes are so last decade.
I’ll be moving straight into the future where I can calm any and all my anxieties
with the push of a button at a puppy vending machine.
With this vending machine, I can do that for the low price of $88.
The puppies are kept in relatively decent boxes with windows and toys while spectators
choose which one to take home.
Sure, it’s a little different than choosing between a water bottle and a Fanta, but a
beagle vs a pug is a much more fun decision.
Of course, a Fanta isn’t going to pee on the floor later, but every vending machine
has its pros and cons.
All I can say is, I’d probably become the male version of a cat lady and come home with
four puppies every single day if they had one of these near me.
5.
Live Crabs Japan isn’t the only cool kid in Asia with
cool vending machines.
China is also making shopping quicker, even for crustaceans, as seen in this Chinese machine
that sells fresh crabs!
They’re intricate machines because it’s not all about taking bills, giving change,
and refrigerating soft drinks.
The internal temperature has to be an even 41 degrees Fahrenheit to be somewhat humane
to the creatures.
The crabs, at this temperature, stay at a state of hibernation without dying.
In fact, the vending company goes as far as to compensate any dead crab you buy with three
live ones.
Not a bad deal!
4.
Toilet Paper This vending machine kind of reminds of the
umbrella one.
Just hear me out.
You don’t approach an umbrella machine unless the clouds are going #1.
You don’t approach a toilet paper machine unless you need to go #2.
It is a per-need basis and if these people aren’t charging up the wahoo - literally
- for this TP, then they are better humans than I am.
Just imagine, you had some dodgy vending machine flying fish soup and now you really have to
go, but you know your subway bathrooms are less than hygienic and toilet paper is scarce.
What to do?
Hit the TP machine.
Regardless, I see the future of this vending machine pooping, I mean working, quite well.
3.
Lettuce Number three is so far into the future I feel
like we’re in a Black Mirror episode before the horror drops.
This vending machine is exactly what it looks like, and is called “The Chef’s Farm”,
and accurately so!
It grows sixty heads of lettuce per day inside its super calculated mini-environment that
uses fluorescent light.
They’re all bright, fresh, green lettuce heads, perfect for any chef who needs a big
batch quickly and easily without making a trip to the store.
Vending machines for Snickers and Gatorade are too old school.
This is the future and if a head of lettuce will cost me $10 dollars, so be it.
2.
Live Bait Fishermen seem to be like boy scouts, always
prepared.
However, you’d be surprised how many of them leave many of their supplies at home.
It may have been their jaw holder, their line gripper, their...
I don’t know any more fishing accessories.
What I do know though, is that the worst thing to forget at home has to be the bait!
You can have all of your fishing gear together, you get on the water and you have nothing
to make your rod attractive to actual fish.
Fear not, fisherman!
Just petition your city for a batch of these babies.
They’re bait vending machines, for every fisherman or woman who may forget or run out
of bait when the time comes.
Need an extra worm or a fly?
It’s been chilled and prepared for your catch of the day.
1.
Gold Finally, of course, the one thing we all want
when we see the shining light of promise from a vending machine across the room.
Whether it’s at an airport gate, a hospital, a mall, or even a school, we could all benefit
from a vending machine full of... gold!
Is this the brand new Barbie Dream House?
Not quite.
This vending machine in Abu Dhabi will, for a price, give you your own small box of gold
to take home.
Well, a small black box holding your tiny little bit of gold.
The coins can weigh up to ten grams and, surprisingly, sells to you at the market value, updated
every ten seconds.
Maybe this won’t get you out of a bind anytime soon, but it certainly is cool!