Heya playa, do you constantly get rejected every single time you
ask your crush to hang out over text?
Don't worry about it.
I'm going to walk you through exactly what you need to say to get the answer
that you're looking for and to decrease the chances of them actually saying no.
Asking someone out over text isn't as simple as saying do you want to go out with me, yes or no?
You actually have to put a little bit more thought and effort into it because
why would they want to hang out with you when they barely know you at all?
Making plans is not only a time commitment but you're
holding yourself accountable to that person.
If you choose to flake, they're gonna call you out on it.
Plus there's always the potential that things might get awkward and
weird if you're around them and you guys have nothing to talk about.
It's a lot of commitment and not everyone is willing to do that.
So, how do you get that person on board and
comfortable with the idea of going out on a date with you?
Well, follow these three steps closely.
First off, what you're going to want to do is flirt a whole lot more
and look for signs of interest.
This is going to lay the groundwork that's going to let them know that
you want to spend time with them and it's not going to catch them off guard.
Now I know what you're thinking, well I kind of flirt with them, I think?
Does that count?
What counts as flirting?
I'm not really sure.
Well, this isn't flirting.
"Hey, I'm sorry for bothering you but I just
wanted to say that you're so perfect and so beautiful and so amazing."
"Aww, thanks".
Don't be that guy, flirting should look a lot more like this.
"Wow your latest IG post is such a vibe. You look mad cute (winky face)"
"Wow, thanks (heart eyes emoji) you're not so bad yourself tiger (winky face)."
Flirting doesn't have to be complicated.
It could be as simple as complimenting them, asking questions to learn more about them,
or showing a genuine interest in something that they like.
I've done a video diving deeper into flirting techniques which you could
check out over here but, really what you're trying to do is not catch them off guard.
You don't want to think "wow this guy is just a friend" and then "wow why is he asking me out?"
And that leads to the second thing you need
to start doing over text which is building up to the hangout.
That's going to leave them excited and curious to actually dive into that activity with you.
Think about it like this, if you just message someone and say something like
"hey are you free Friday? Do you want to go grab dinner and watch a movie?".
You're asking a pretty basic yes or no question.
You're not building up to the two of you hanging out, you're not building up the dinner and how
fun and special it's gonna be and you're not really building up the excitement for the movie.
You're really just asking them a very basic question.
But, there's a very simple way to take that boring question and make it a whole lot more fun.
Build up the idea of going to that restaurant.
Let them know what your favorite meal is.
Let them know if you've been there before and what you really like about it.
You might also want to build up the excitement for the movie by sending
them the movie trailer or talking about your favorite actor in it or
letting them know how long you've been waiting for it to come out.
"I'm super serious though, you don't understand how hyped I am for the new
Black Widow movie. I've been waiting for this forever. How about you?"
"Yeah me too! I just saw the new trailer and I'm
so hyped for it. Black Widow is literally my favorite Avenger."
The more you have conversations about that activity and build up the hype around it,
the easier it's going to be to slide on into their DMs and ask them out.
The third piece here is the most important though because people make this mistake all the time.
They put everything out there, they tell them that they like them, they complement them,
they ask them to hang out, and then they just sit back and wait for this person to say yes or no.
Don't do that.
Instead of leaving the fate of you getting rejected on the simple basis
of them answering a yes or no question, invite them to join you in that activity.
This approach definitely hits differently.
Trust me on that because what you're actually doing is building the fun
and the excitement and the activity around you.
You're gonna participate in it and if they want to be a part of that, that's up to them.
If they choose not to do it you're still gonna
have fun and have a good time and do the thing that you want to do.
Far too often we ask someone to hang out and we suggest something to do
and if they turn us down and reject us we never end up doing it so the
fate of you having fun and enjoying your life rests on their answer.
And that's something you need to change up.
If they say yes, that's awesome.
That means they'll join you in on that activity.
You guys will have fun and do your own thing, but what if they say no?
Here's the beauty of that approach.
If they tell you no, it's simply them letting you know that they can't join
you on that specific instance of hanging out.
But it doesn't guarantee that they won't hang out with you in future instances so rinse and repeat.
Talk about the things that you want to do, build up excitement, and ask them out again.
"Hey remember the ice cream place we were talking about? Well, I just saw that they unveiled a new
flavor. I'm thinking about checking it out on Saturday. You want to come to join me?"
"Oh my god I saw it on their Instagram and I totally want
to try it out but I'm busy on Saturday. Maybe another time?"
"No problem. I'm going to check it out on Saturday anyway but I'll report back to you
and let you know just how good it is and what you're missing out on (winky face)."
Now, what if you're faced with a flat-out hard rejection and they say something like
"I'm not interested in hanging out with you" or "I just don't like you"?
Well, at least you can rest assured knowing that you've done all that you
could to give yourself the best fighting chance in actually hanging out with them.
If they're not interested that's their own personal choice but you should still follow the
steps that are going to best align you for the opportunity to potentially hang out with them.
You can never give yourself 100% odds against rejection.
But dang it, there are so many things you can do to lower the potential of it happening.
So what I want you to do is check out the videos over there on the
side to learn more about how to deal with rejection if you're face to face with it.
On that note, I'll catch you next time.
As always, love and peace.