Bless-ed, art thou when people persecute thee,
insult thee, or lie about thee because of me.
Blessed art those, who are persecuted because of their righteousness
Dost I spy a professional victim over yonder? Hast the oppression Olympics commenced?
Being persecuted is thine currency? Thou art a cuck!
Nut up or shut up. Am I right? Up high!
Do not divorce thy wife,
for you'll make her the victim of adultery, and do not-
That's right, JC. Marriage is
sacred. I love marriage so much I've done it four times.
Do not swear any oaths
not by heaven nor Earth nor Jerusalem. 'Tis enough to simply say yes or no, and
anything beyond that is of the devil.
Woah, dude, art thou seriously suggesting that we should taketh the knee during the Pledge of Allegiance?
I'm sorry, but Jerusalem first. Show some respect, Jesus. Art thou one of those
JLM
protesters? Hands up, don't crucify! Not cool, man.
He have heard that it was said eye for eye and tooth for tooth.
But I say unto thee do not resist an evil person
Ye have heard that it was said
God is the Alpha and the Omega
But I say unto thee
Jesus is the beta.
If anyone slaps thee on the right cheek turn to them the other cheek also...
Ha ha
More cuck stuff. To hell with that! There's a reason I open carry my sword, dude.
If thou should strikth with me, I shall strikth at three back ten times harder
Thou best believe. No, that is a poor attitude.
For instance if someone wants to sue thee for thine shirt,
hand over that coat as well.
-I've got the best lawyer in town
Good luck suing me. And if anyone forces thee to go one mile go
with them two miles. Nobody's going to force me thou can shove
statist coercion where the Sun does not shine
If thou list has a problem with that then
1776 BC shalt commence again.
give to those who ask thee and do not reject those
Who want to borrow from thee.
can I borrow thy hammer and sickle?
Jesus, Jesus.
do not be hypocritical when ye pray
hypocrites love to pray Counting public and
Upon the books of face and they pray with the tags of hash
So that they will be seen by others
Verily I say unto thee that
that is their reward in full.
But when thou prayest thou should do it in private
Go into thy room and close the door when thy prayer oh
So now we subduct pray in public
This is how it starts I say unto thee if thou do not like it the way I practice my religion.
Then thou can get the hell out. Just go away if my prayer bothers these so much.
I'm praying for thee Jesus right now
Do something about it?
Didn't think so. All of these problems in Jerusalem today are because we doth not
institute public prayer at schools and sporting events and government meetings and now
here
thou are telling people not to pray in public. Thou art helping cause the downfall of Middle Eastern
Society. I hope thou knowest that Jesus. No wonder the economy is in the feces bucket.
Everyone here needs to invest in
Gold for when the real manure strikes the fan.
Worry not about saving money.
Thou cannot serve both God and money.
Yeah right. Thou thinketh if I want to live on handouts like thee? Get a job low
Get a job low life!
I thought I permanently borrowed thy hammer and sickle.
Worry not about thy life.
Worry not even about what thou hast will eat or drink.
For God will provide.
First of all! Thou ain't going to be eating anything with all this commie crap. Second of all, worry not about my life?
Dude the globalists hath taken over!
We've got open borders and immigrants flooding in with no Ark to save us! And thy answer is, "Don't worry be happy"?
Thy mind is like that of a child, Jesus!
Indeed
For whosoever shall humble himself as a little child shall be greatest in heaven.
And then the lowlifes shalt walk all over thee on earth.
Do not be so judgmental and hypocritical.
Before thou start
criticizing someone for their transgression!
Make certain thou art not even more guilty of that same transgression!
I'm not guilty of anything! It is just that the world is going to hell with all these...
sexual devi-ah-ants
Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa. Hold up, baby. Can I can I get thyt pigeon number?
Yeah right. Like I'd give my pigeon number to someone who hangs out with these scumbags.
Thanks a lot Jesus. Thou art quite the rooster blocker!
Why the hell does thou hang around with all these lowlifes anyway?
Tis the sinners who need my message,
not the righteous.
Tis sick people who need a doctor not healthy people.
Ahhh there's just a far better class of people at the temple JC.
Tis not my fault these people doth not know how to square their lives away.
Why should that be my problem?
Worry not for we're done hanging out.
I'm sending ye all into the towns and villages.
Take nothing with thee! No money. No bag with spare clothes! Nothing!
Stay at the homes of strangers and live off their goodwill.
That will be enough and if they deny thee.
Then to hell with them!
Hold up!
Now thou wanted us to live like vagabonds?
Jesus I'm not some bum. Okay? This is silk. This is gold. It's called...
self-reliance leech. Look it up! Thus thou live and die mothers cellar?
Forget thy mother!
Anyone who loves their mother or father more than me. He's not worthy.
Anyone who loves their son or daughter....
more than me is not worthy!
So much for family values. JC?
We're cool and all but thy family is the basis of society!
And how I define family pretty much best to apply to everyone else. Thou get that? Right?
Scroll-tis-tics(statistics) show that married couples make more money!
Stop worrying so much about money. It is extremely difficult for the rich to enter the kingdom of heaven.
For they are attached to their worldly possessions.
Oh, that's right. Just give up all thy possession thou hath worked so hard for. So says Jesus of Lenin, I mean Nazareth!
If thou worked all day long, while that co-worker only worked a single hour.
Do not be bothered, even if thy boss identical wages.
Oh here we go with the free rides for lowlifes again!
Why should I have to do all the work, while lazy people get handouts?
That poor widow has put in more than all the others.
How could you possibly say that Jesus? The rich people are the ones who pay for everything!
The bottom 50% only pay for like 2%.
They're all leeches Jesus.
The rich gave out of their wealth.
Not what they have to live on.
But she gave out of her poverty. Put in all she had to live on.
Get a job freeloader!
Eh, can any of ye point out Jesus of Nazareth?
Ha ha ha
I can! But it will cost thee thirty silver.
Judas! How dare are thee!?
I'll do it for 25!
A profit for a prophet! Oh, ho. Am I right? Up high!
1776 BC
will commence again!
Father forgive them!
For they know not what they do.
Forgive us?
Hey, I fully support capital punishment. Don't do the crime if thou can't do the time!
Thug!
They killed him! Don't you get that?
They killed our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!
And he said that the last days will be coming very soon! And what are you doing about it? Huh!?
You can't...
even...
cough...
up a measely...
5 silver....
for this one of a kind...
ivory end-times pendant!
How are you supposed to display to everyone, how pious you are without an end times pendant?
Hey everyone. DarkMatter2525 here with an....
unusual announcement!
Apparently God Almighty Himself
uploaded one of his old school vlogs with his crappy webcam. But deleted it right away due to embarrassment.
Fortunately, a youtuber named Logicked. Who I've been subbed to for a long time...
and who I highly recommend. Was able to get a hold of God's deleted video...
and he actually made a response video to it on his channel. Check it out. I quite liked it.
Apparently there's a rumor going around that God is just a cartoon or something. And he gets exposed in the video!
I don't know. It's pretty ridiculous. But, highly entertaining. Anyway links in the description...
comments, video, etcetra.
Please check it out and sub to Logicked!
Take care everyone.