- And he kept on looking at me going,
"I'm doing the best I can.
"I'm doing the best I can."
Over and over again.
I'm like, "I know you are.
"You're doing a great job.
"I'm just trying to help."
"I'm doing the best I can."
(playful music)
(child laughing)
- We're off to a good start here.
- Yeah. Happy new year.
- We had an incident that we'd like to show you,
involving our son.
- First of all, we had an amazing vacation,
and on the way back, we had a great flight.
Everything was great.
- It was. - It was great.
- Until it wasn't.
- These are the things in parenting
that I believe you are never quite prepared for.
- No.
- These are the things that,
if they told you about,
we actually would have, maybe not become parents.
I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- We don't have any video because we were freaking out.
We couldn't hold the camera.
But we're going to reenact it for you
so that you kind of understand.
So picture this.
We're on the plane.
I'm next to Penn Charles.
Kim is in front of us.
One seat in front of us.
We're all giggling because we found a way
to make cows fall off of a giant ladder in Minecraft.
And, Penn Charles, remember what you said?
- Stop making me laugh.
I'm probably gonna puke.
- He said that.
I'm sure I was like,
"Whatever, he's not gonna puke from laughing.
"It's just that I'm very funny."
Five minutes later, the plane takes off.
I am looking straight ahead.
I've got my gadgets.
- This is Penn on a plane,
"I've got an iPad, and I've got a cell phone,
"and I've got a computer,
"and I've got noise-reduction headphones.
"I cannot be bored ever on a plane.
"Not for one minute, ever.
"Ever, ever, ever."
- Right, so I've got all this stuff all around me.
And all of the sudden, I hear Penn Charles go,
"I think I'm gonna puke."
And I was like, "Oh, do you think-" (loud puking)
That's how much warning I got.
(loud puking)
And so I'm trying to position his head so that
it doesn't go anywhere else.
And I've got the iPad and the noise reduction
and my computer's on the ground,
so the only safe place to put the puke,
and it's a lot of puke, is
Yeah, on my crotch.
And Penn Charles is trying to talk in between it.
He's like, "Daddy" (loud puking)
"I think this is-" (loud puking)
- That is such a gross sound.
Could maybe we make it sound more like
unicorn sparkles or something?
- Nope. (loud puking)
So here's what Kim's doing.
Kim's in front of us and,
Kim, I'm handling it the best I can.
Would you agree that I'm handling it the best I can?
- You did a great job.
But I unbuckled my seat belt,
and immediately I just grabbed,
I had some napkins in my purse, and some tissues.
- You started throwing stuff at me.
You were throwing.
He was still puking and you were throwing
different things at me.
Here's what it is.
You're a very sweet mom,
and you were not the alpha in this situation,
and you were on the sidelines,
and you were trying to get into the game
of helping him out with puke.
You were like, "Are you holding his head up right?"
"Is this enough napkins?"
"You're not using them.
"Use the sanitary napkins, don't use the toilet paper
"because that's gonna.
"Is the seat okay?
"Is the floor okay?"
- I kept turning around to give things
to Penn to try to help,
and he kept on looking at me going,
"I'm doing the best I can.
"I'm doing the best I can."
Over and over again.
I'm like, "I know you are.
"You're doing a great job.
"I'm just trying to help."
"I'm doing the best I can."
- That's the only thing I could think of.
- "I'm doing the best I can."
- I didn't know how to-
- "I'm doing the best I can."
- I didn't know how to make words.
- I'm normally the puke dealer.
- Right.
You did not like being on the sidelines.
- I did not like being on the sidelines.
But instantly, I have to say,
all the moms in the surrounding area
heard that familiar sound and starting throwing
baby wipes, and anti-bacterial stuff, because everybody-
- Diapers!
- Diapers.
- Yeah, oh yes. I think there was a diaper that we used
to help absorb stuff.
- The girl next to me, God bless her,
a little bit got on her sleeve, through the seats.
So she was taking her scented hand lotion
and just putting it up to her nose,
so she could smell something else.
Because it was so rank.
And I didn't know what to say.
And I'm like, "I'm so sorry.
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry."
It was high-level parenting.
There are a few things we've learned
about this that we will now travel differently,
because we do travel a lot.
- Just a bag.
Just have a bag.
Always have a bag.
- We'll always have a plastic bag.
We'll always have wipes.
Even if it's just to offer it to somebody else.
And, honestly, a change of clothes for
a grown-up change of clothes.
He was fine.
He got none of it on himself.
It went all over you,
and we had no clothes in our carryon.
- I got some on the back of my leg.
- Not much, dude.
Like, this much.
- I think, after handling this incident,
we can now handle most parenting situations.
- Anything, yeah.
- Yeah, we're better equipped.
I'd put that up with natural childbirth.
(wailing)
Of the most painful things we've ever been through.
- You were not even on the row.
- But, watching it.
But I also had to deal with the looks
from people around us.
- Oh, you poor thing, you had to deal with looks.
- Thank you to the nice family who gave us baby wipes
and anti-bacterials.
Apologies to the girl next to us.
- Thank you to everyone on the plane for just not,
they could have been very, very annoyed.
- I think they were annoyed.
I mean, what are you gonna do, though?
- Thanks to the flight attendant who brought
tons of ginger ale and barf bags,
and gave him an extra ginger ale when he got off the plane.
- It was a trash bag.
- And we've kept him home from school now for several days,
because we don't want this to be ground zero.
- But I'm ready to say, "Would you like to have him now?"
- Help me!
- But can you also, other people who get stomach bugs,
keep your kids home from school, please?
Because sometimes I will judge you if you say
and literally this has happened to me,
"Oh, my kid was up puking all night last night."
But then they show up to school the next day,
"Oh, they're fine.
"They got it out of their system"
No.
No, I will judge you.
Keep your kids home when they're sick.
I think you're ready to go back, right buddy?
- Tomorrow.
- Good. I mean, aw.
- Aw. We'll miss you
Glad you're feeling better.
- Bye. - Bye.
- Ruby, you're not on an airplane.
- [Kim] Ruby, dogs aren't allowed on airplanes.
- Ruby is on an airplane.
- [Kim] Ruby, over here.