My comedy is based
off weird interactions I have with people.
I find it kind of weird
that more young people don't use Yiddish slang.
I think it's amazingly
that Jake does his standup comedy
'cause to see someone shy and quiet like him
get up on stage,
he's very comfortable up on stage,
much more so than in real life.
When I do comedy,
the anxiety kind of just builds and builds,
but after getting a few laughs, it just kind of releases.
Yeah, well, we're going to break.
Susan, you wanted to say something
and I had to cut you off so we could go to break.
Sorry, let me give you the floor now.
I just wanted to bring up
that at other times in his life,
Jake was much more functional.
High school, for example,
he got himself up every day, went to class every day,
he never had to be told to do that.
It was just his normal functioning.
So we've seen him be successful,
but he's in this situation now.
Well, Susan, let me ask you something,
you have an oven and a range in the kitchen, right?
Yes.
And you use fire to cook with, right?
Yes.
Do you get two sticks and rub them together real fast
to start a fire?
No.
Why not?
It's quicker to use the range.
So you've never had to rub two sticks together
because there's an easier way to do it?
Mmhmm.
Now, Jake, he lays around his room,
he doesn't pay his bills,
he doesn't take a shower,
he doesn't clean up,
he doesn't do anything for himself,
just like you don't rub two sticks together to get a fire.
Why do you suppose that is?
There's no necessity.
Absolutely no necessity.
I don't ask myself why he does this.
I ask myself, why not?
Let's just look at whether you guys enable him or not.
He avoids taking risks and responsibilities
and complains about unfair treatment,
so Susan and Randy worry and feel responsible for Jacob.
They feel stressed and resentful
over having to take care of him.
Now, Susan and Randy make excuses for Jacob.
Jacob feels weak and inadequate and helpless.
It's like, we're on a race track that has no exit ramp here.
We don't know how to get him off the track.
Do you want off the track, Jacob?
Yes.
What do you want your life to look like?
I want to feel better about myself.
I want to be a regular working productive member of society.
Do you ever listen to the things you say to yourself?
Here are just some of the things that jumped out at me.
"I basically feel miserable.
Nothing brings me joy.
I'm scared I won't have a future.
I'm empty, broken, defeated, I feel like a failure."
How do you think you're going to feel
when that's the way you talk to yourself most of the time?
Same way I feel now, pretty terrible.
You can't have that kind of internal dialogue
and then look in the mirror and say, I got this, I got this,
put me in coach, I'm kicking ass and taking names,
I got this.
There's no other possible outcome.
I mean, mom, dad, do you see that?
Yes, we see that.
We don't know how to-
Don't give me a but, just tell me you see it.
It's just if he doesn't change what he says to himself,
all the help, all the housing, all the money,
all the pampering, all the excuses,
if that doesn't change, everything else is a nonstarter.
Can we agree on that?
Yes. Yes.