What would you do if people all across the country wanted to smash your face in?
Today on History for People Quarantining Because of the Virus Yokai,
I bring you the Genpei War (1180 - 1185).
It was a civil war in the Heian Period that kicked off the age of samurai rule in Japan.
Nothing like a good old war to end the Era of Peace.
It was a fight for independence for the Kanto region, a region of misfit warriors and troublemakers
whose hobby was to once in a while drive thorns into the side of the capital.
The Genpei War is often said to be a war between the seafaring Taira in the west
and the horse-riding Minamoto to the east.
And I’m here to tell you that that’s WRONG.
Just kidding, but it is a simplification.
There were Taira, Minamoto, and allies of both on all sides, and minor clans that switched
sides depending on which way the wind blew.
The most well-known document that tells the story of the war is the Heike Monogatari,
or Tale of the Heike.
It’s very popular, people sing songs and play music about it even today.
It’s a work of historical fiction.
Plenty of talk about ghosts and supernatural things, so you can’t take it at face value.
Luckily there are oodles and noodles of different sources about the war.
The war had three main players: Taira no Kiyomori, Minamoto no Yoritomo, and Kiso Yoshinaka.
Let’s talk about the first guy.
When the first arrows of the war started flying, Taira no Kiyomori was the most powerful man
in the country.
How did it happen?
There was a conflict 20 years before called the Heiji Rebellion, where Kiyomori rescued
the Emperor Nijo and Retired Emperor Go-Shirakawa from the hands of the Minamoto.
The emperor’s kidnapper, Minamoto no Yoshitomo, died in the war, but in a show of mercy, the
victor Kiyomori did not kill his young sons.
He only exiled them.
Three of the sons would be important to our story later:
Yoritomo, Noriyori, and samurai baby Yoshitsune.
To many of the civilized, effeminate nobles in court, the Heiji Rebellion was like when
you were at Disneyland and saw Mickey take off his head and he turned out to be a guy
with one eye, two teeth, and three arrest warrants.
Their world was shattered.
The rebellion destroyed palaces, killed noblemen, noblewomen suffered all kinds of abuse, and
soldiers displayed heads in public like takoyaki in blood sauce.
The ruling aristocracy was shook, and probably hesitant to challenge Kiyomori,
a member of the warrior class.
After he swept the Minamoto out of the way in the Heiji Rebellion, Kiyomori’s Taira
clan became the top warrior clan.
Taira stock was soaring, like the Dow before a certain pandemic hit.
Now this guy, Kiyomori, if he took one of those tests to see which Game of Thrones character
he was, he would’ve gotten Tywin Lannister.
Smart and ruthless.
He was part of a warrior house, but unlike the typical meathead warrior in the countryside
at the time, he was a master politician.
Retired Emperor Go-Shirakawa was the power behind the throne at the time, and because
Kiyomori saved his life, Go-Shirakawa became his elevator to the top.
Kiyomori rose the ranks to become daijo daijin (太政大臣), or chancellor, or chief minister,
the highest office in the government.
He also married a daughter into the Imperial Family, to the displeasure of a certain clan.
Kiyomori’s influence just kept growing.
He built a trade empire across the sea with Song China.
He put Taira men in the governor’s seat of many provinces.
He accumulated men all across the country who swore their bows to his name.
Kiyomori even overshadowed the Retired Emperor Go-Shirakawa.
When Go-Shirakawa allies plotted to overthrow him, he either executed or exiled the conspirators,
placed the Retired Emperor himself under house arrest, and stripped other Go-Shirakawa allies
of their offices.
The government was effectively ruled by the Taira, and specifically by Taira no Kiyomori.
In 1180, Kiyomori’s grandson became emperor, Emperor Antoku, purely due to Antoku’s own
intelligence and impressive achievements as a 2-year-old.
His significant accomplishments thus far included walking, and peeing inside the toilet without
friendly fire.
One prince, whose name is really hard to pronounce so let’s call him Prince Mochi,
Prince Mochi was mad that a 2-year-old took the throne that was rightfully his.
“I am mad,” he said.
He was insulted, and irritated.
And he wasn’t alone.
Taira domination of the Heian court irritated many in the capital.
Kiyomori also pissed off temples and religious leaders because he passed laws suppressing
religious protestors.
If you didn’t know, Buddhist monks back then were fierce and would come down from
their mountains and eff shit up if there was a law they didn’t like.
Prince Mochi typed “#tiredoftaira” in Google Trends
and saw that the people were ready.
He put out a call to arms for people across the country to rise up against Taira tyranny.
A Minamoto no Yorimasa answered the call first.
These two opened the first chapter of the Genpei War, and closed the last chapter of
their lives because they would die pretty quickly.
In the grand opening, the Battle of Uji in 1180, their rebel army fled across the Uji
River and destroyed the bridge behind them.
The Taira army saw the broken bridge and said, “that’s cute” and crossed the river
on their horses anyways and smashed the other side, and not in the good way.
Prince Mochi ran but was captured and killed.
Minamoto no Yorimasa committed ritual suicide, the second recorded instance of seppuku.
The first instance happened 10 years ago, and Minamoto no Tametomo held that honor.
It was written later that a loyal follower of Yorimasa cut off his lord’s head, tied
it to a stone, and threw it in the river so that the head wouldn’t fall into enemy hands,
because ew.
The Taira had crushed the first of the rebels, but the floodgates were opened,
and haters poured out.
Remember the three brothers that Kiyomori spared 20 years ago?
Well, now they were older, they were bolder, and they had broad shoulders I dunno.
Minamoto no Yoritomo, the second important person in our story, assumed leadership of
the Minamoto clan and raised his own banner of rebellion.
His younger brothers backed him, Noriyori and Yoshitsune.
Yoshitsune here actually became a legendary samurai.
They wrote a bunch of stories about him.
Maybe I’ll retell some of them.
Would you like that? Huh, would ya? Would ya??
Independently from Yoritomo, his cousin, Kiso Yoshinaka, also raised his hand and said,
“I wanna revolt too.”
He was also a Minamoto, he just decided to change his surname to Kiso after the place
he was raised, the Kiso Mountains.
We’ll call him Lord Kiso, to make it easier to remember.
According to the history books, Kiyomori saw what happened and said,
“Well, that sucks,
now I have to deal with both of these guys--
OMG!”
Because at that very moment, all across the country, warriors rose up independently against
Taira rule.
The brewing Taira hate was now coming to the surface.
Turns out, the Taira made a lot of enemies in the provinces.
They were governors of many provinces, maybe almost half of them.
The governors stayed in the capital and sucked tax revenue
from the provinces into Taira coffers.
Warriors in the provinces thought that was mighty rude.
Kiyomori also imported cash from the Song Chinese, causing massive inflation.
People were just itching to overthrow the Taira, the Minamoto were just lucky to be
in a position to scratch their itch.
Most of these warriors joined either Lord Kiso or Yoritomo.
The three sides were locked and loaded.
Oh it’s on madafakas.
Hold on to your bean bag chair, hit the notification bell, it’s about to get real.
Alright, today’s quiz question is this.
What does a kitsune need to put on its head to shapeshift?
Winner gets one of these things.
I’ll choose a winner in 24 hours, good luck.
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Alright stay safe, don't get sick, much love, and spread the knowledge!