recently it has come to my attention that
there is a significant number of you americans out there, who seemingly
lack the ability to speak
or coherently write a simple sentence in your native tongue.
Now, while I do take a certain degree of pleasure in this
I feel it is my duty to correct you in some of the most common and ghastly errors
you Yankee-Doodle-Dummies
continue to make. This is Doctor Edward Richtofen
GRAMMAR NAZI!
One of the most telling signs of complete American incompetence
is improper usage of "They're," "Their" and "There." I find it absolutely enraging when one cannot
identify the simple difference between the uses
Let us begin, from the top. There is defined as the opposite of here,
or in that place. For example,
if you were to ask "Where is Dempsey?"
I would reply, "His stupid face is over there!"
"Their" is a possessive adjective, which appears before a noun
it demonstrates possession or that something belongs to them.
For instance if Dempsey, Takeo and Nikolai were suddenly surrounded by a horde of ravenous zombies, completely out of ammunition
with no escape in sight, I would say, "That is their problem, not mine."
Lastly, "They're" is a contraction
and it is used in place of "They are." As in...
They're slowly dying an agonizingly
painful death! Now, let's use all three in a sentence!
They're losing copious amounts of blood, as my
flesh-eating minions feast on their innards,
over there, beside that teddy bear! Ooh, that rhymed!
I'm a poet and I didn't even know it! (Giggles) This has been Doctor Edward Richtofen
GRAMMAR NAZI! Now, remember mein lieblings,
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Finally if you think you are such a smarty pants and you have a
grammatical gripe you'd like to see me clarify for are lazy American brethren,
leave it in the comment section below.
If I deem it worthy enough, you might even see me share it in a future episode of
Doctor Edward Richtofen, GRAMMAR NAZI!