- You can't handle the truth behind these food crimes.
- Let's talk about that.
(upbeat music)
- Good mythical morning.
- In the mythical justice system,
culinary based offenses are considered especially heinous.
On "Good Mythical Morning," the dedicated detectives
who investigate these vicious felonies
are members of an elite squad known as the food crimes unit.
These are their stories.
- Dun dun.
- That's right, we're back
with a whole new batch of food crimes.
- I was getting excited about doing the dun dun.
- Yeah, I could tell.
- You may remember from when we tried a collection
of these last year that a food crime
is a dish that someone has actually made
and then shared photos online.
And the response is hoards of comments
declaring them crimes against the culinary arts.
And while I'd rather mud wrestle a bunch of hogs
hyped up on pre-workout than taste any of these
gnarly culinary catastrophes,
I guess it doesn't matter what I want.
- Yup.
- It's time for you thought there weren't more food crimes.
You were wrong like a sucker.
Let's hope these new crimes don't make our butts pucker.
Okay, we recently posted a series of match-ups
of real food crimes we found on the internet.
And then you voted on which dishes
you thought were the biggest food crimes,
meaning which one you would least want to eat.
- Yes, and just like last time
we suffered through this abominable episode,
we're gonna have to try the Mythical Kitchen's
recreations of these food crimes.
And then we're gonna need to think like a mythical beast
and guess which dishes y'all thought
were the worst offenders, and then Stevie is gonna reveal
which one you actually voted on.
- Points escalate each round
and the loser will once again have to eat a brand new,
bigger, badder food crime created by Nicole.
- All right.
- You're devious.
- [Nicole] Yeah. - Devious woman.
- Let's get these food crimes booked and fingerprinted.
(dramatic music)
Okay, first up we got what I can only imagine
is the food that is served at baseball games in Hell.
- Yeah.
- A fish hot dog versus the potato hotdog,
AKA the super tuber.
Now, this fish hot dog is apparently a Ballpark brand
cheese dog wrapped in the skin of an Atlantic salmon filet
on a traditional hot dog bun.
It was originally suggested as a Facebook post.
The creator of this hot dog calls it
the best hot dog ever and super tasty.
But when it was transported over to Reddit,
user MewTheBest said
"this post makes me feel upset and worried."
I'm on page upset and worried.
- [Link] At least there's cheese in the dog.
- Gotta get to the cheese.
- I'm trying to like emphasize the positive,
but to get to the cheese, you also have to eat the skin.
- [Stevie] This is giving me goosebumps looking at it
and the idea that you're going to eat it.
- It doesn't seem too crunchy, Nicole.
- [Nicole] I just microwaved it for like 30 seconds.
- Microwaved it, good.
- It's microwaved fish skin?
- I'm going in the middle 'cause I want to make sure
that I get all of the, you know, everything.
- I'm just gonna pull off some of this.
- All right, here we go.
Oh.
- Ooh, that's strong.
Very fishy.
- The skin is like the worst part of a fish.
- It's the worst here too.
- That's awful.
I'm gonna have to digest it though.
- And it's up against the super tuber.
Gosh, that was horrible. All right.
This is a cored potato rubbed with butter
and baked with a hot dog inside.
Mustard on the side for dipping.
This is true, this was a favorite of ex-senator Larry Craig,
who submitted it to a 2007 cookbook titled "Congress Cooks."
And he named it the super tuber.
But you may remember Larry Craig as the guy
who had to resign from his Senate seat in 2007
after he got caught soliciting sexual acts
in the Minneapolis St. Paul International Airport.
- Let me tell you straight up right now,
we're not going to make any jokes
where we connect Larry Craig with the fact that
he invented the super tuber with the fact that
he got caught soliciting sexual acts.
- Yeah, we're not gonna connect the two.
- There's no connection between those.
- 'Cause how could there be a connection,
comedic or otherwise?
- Right, I mean, when you press on the wiener,
it does come out like this,
but we're not making any connection.
I'm gonna push it right back in
because I don't want anybody's minds to go there.
Okay, this is a super tuber.
It's just a potato with a wiener inside of it.
- How do we know the potato's cooked all the way through?
- I'm dipping it in mustard.
- [Link] Does it matter?
- [Rhett] Nicole, is it potato cooked all the way through?
- [Nicole] I microwaved it for about 40 seconds.
- Okay. All right.
Don't go too hard.
- Oh gosh.
- [Rhett] There's a nice cross section.
- Well, it doesn't give a corn dog a run for its money.
- But it's not awful.
- Does it give a fish hot dog a run for its money?
Absolutely.
- [Rhett] Okay, so we're guessing which one
you guys thought would be worse.
Definitively, this one is worse.
- [Stevie] You want a three, two, one?
- Yeah, a three, two, one.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- 'Cause we might come over here and then come over here.
- Yeah, we did.
- [Stevie] Wow. I like the way you did that.
83% of the mythical beasts thought the fish hot dog
was the bigger food crime.
- Of course you did. We both have a point.
So it basically means nothing.
- Is that redemption for Larry Craig?
- Let's leave him out of this.
(dramatic music)
Two points up for grabs now.
And up next, we got a solid argument for why chickens
should never cross any roads and should stay on their farms
and should never mate.
This is SpaghettiOs-filled hard boiled eggs
versus PB&J-filled hard boiled eggs.
- Okay, SpaghettiO eggs, very simple.
It's basically just SpaghettiOs in a boiled egg
garnished with paprika and dried parsley.
It's an original creation made by The Vulgar Chef,
a chef dedicated to brazenly committing food crimes
all over the internet.
User Zingeronixx says "this feels so Midwest block party
that it's not even funny.
Whose big-haired mom is responsible for this?"
It's not bad.
- I could do without the paprika.
- The paprika is really the problem here?
- Yeah, the paprika's throwing me.
- The cold SpaghettiOs, all right.
- It could it be warmer.
All right, over here we've got
eggs filled with peanut butter and jam.
This is a crime shared on the Reddit community
beep beep food porn, porn, porn, whatever by user--
- Porn, porn, porn.
- PT Willie.
- Just try to avoid saying it, say it three times.
- The reason why I'm having so much trouble
is because there was a little bit of egg
that was crawling out of my mouth.
- Porn?
- As I was saying "porn."
(laughing)
According to the poster, this was made for a cookout,
and by poster, I mean a person,
not like something you hang on your wall.
- But I'd love a poster of just one of these.
- Dink it.
Sink it.
- Neither one of them works.
- The consistencies are very much at odds.
- In reality, I think that the PB&J is easier to eat
because the peanut butter so overpowering.
So the last thing in your mouth
is the taste of peanut butter, which is good.
- [Link] Good. So good.
I think they would think this was nasty.
- Well, don't give any hints.
- We're not working together.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- I agree with you, man.
Because it's the, it's the PB&J,
it's the sweet and the eggs together.
- [Stevie] Yeah, this one's pretty straightforward.
82% of the mythical beasts thought the PB&J eggs.
- I'm surprised it was that much.
- 82 is a lot. That's a landslide.
- Still tied.
(dramatic music)
Is cereal a soup?
Are pop tarts ravioli?
Can a lasagna extend indefinitely is still be one lasagna?
Mythical Chef Josh and Nicole break down the world's biggest
food debates every week on their podcast.
What's it called?
- "A Hot Dog is a Sandwich."
- What's it called?
- [Nicole] "A Hot Dog is a Sandwich."
- Yeah, it's located at your favorite podcast spot.
- Yeah it is, located right there.
- We think you'll enjoy their conversation
and even gather some behind the scenes scoops
on everything that goes on into the Mythical Kitchen.
It goes on what?
- [Nicole] "A Hot Dog is a Sandwich."
- No, Mythical Kitchen.
- [Nicole] Oh, Mythical Kitchen.
- Yeah, that.
- We're promoting two things for you.
- Okay. - [Nicole] Thank you.
- Go support the Mythical Kitchen.
- All right, if either of these next dishes
attempted to cross the border,
Mexican authorities would arrest them on the spot.
We've got the ketchup popcorn taco
versus the pasta burrito.
- [Link] Let's start over here.
- Okay, popcorn taco, pretty simple.
You got a tortilla with popcorn and ketchup inside of it.
It was posted originally on the (squeaks) food porn.
I don't know how you said it, by user Patches_mcgee in 2015,
and the defense of the creation was this happened
a long time ago in a bachelor pad far, far away.
- [Link] Okay.
- [Rhett] I'm gonna get it all kind of here on the edge.
Work it.
- If you weren't already sad, and you probably were
if you're eating this, you definitely are afterwards.
- This is something I could have done in like eighth grade,
ninth grade, it's not bad with the ketchup.
- I mean, it doesn't taste bad.
It's just very empty, emotionally.
- Yeah, right, it's sad. It's a sad food.
- Okay, and now we move on to what one commenter
called a used Italian condom.
- (laughs) Oh gosh.
- This is the pasta burrito, proudly posted
by user SJSharks65 with the caption "I made a pasta burrito.
Behold, the atrocities of man."
- What do you call this, the wrap?
- [Nicole] It's rice paper. We used rice paper, yeah.
- Right, so that you would have in like a spring roll.
- Um, it's a very noodley experience.
Could have added some more things.
- It sort of resolves into just cold pasta.
- [Link] Which one did you think was worse?
- This is, this is not an immediate,
this is not immediately obvious to me.
You showed them pictures, right?
Or you just gave them the descriptions?
Showed them pictures, okay.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- I think with the pictures, this one is nastier.
- This one is like oh, maybe.
- [Stevie] 75% of the mythical beasts thought that
popcorn and ketchup tacos were the bigger food crime.
- Really? 75%?
Well, y'all need to try it, it's not that bad.
It's sad though. It is very sad.
(dramatic music)
- Hope you saved room for dessert, and ketchup,
because I have a feeling that one or both of these dishes
is gonna replace our fond dessert memories
with blind fear and rage, Rhett.
We've got ketchup and mustard cake
versus steak marshmallows.
- All right, let me put this thing on a plate for you
just so you can get a good look at this thing.
- Ketchup and mustard.
- It is exactly, whoa, hey.
- It dances.
- I did it like I'm at the restaurant.
It's exactly what it looks like.
You've got ketchup cake and then a mustard-based icing.
This thing was an original creation
by the YouTube channel Shared Food.
The commenter Kai Lucia said
"I don't think I've ever been more viscerally angry
about a Facebook recipe video.
This burned my crops and stole my first born.
I'm absolutely appalled by this level of disrespect.
I'm ready to fight."
- I got you a piece right here.
- Oh, okay, good. We can save the rest for later.
- This might be good.
- First of all, I love the way it looks.
I like a red velvet cake
And I like ketchup and mustard.
- [Link] Boop.
- It's not bad.
The gingerbread thing.
- Nicole, the way you made this, I mean,
it still has a cakey sweetness.
- [Nicole] Yeah, there's sugar in the icing.
There's sugar in the cake,
it has a little bit of a spice cake feel to it.
- That's right, spice cake.
- I like it.
- And that spice cake kinda mustardyness,
it does work, especially when you say that.
- It actually tastes good.
- [Link] Yeah, this is nice.
(Nicole laughs) Right up my alley.
- These colors are the colors that make you the hungriest.
That's why all fast food is yellow and red.
So I'm just, I want more.
- Did you think we were gonna love this?
- [Nicole] No. (Rhett laughs)
- I don't even like mustard a lot.
- But it takes the edge off.
Now what about this though?
- Okay, this was posted by user Fluffy_Munchkin,
who said, "why did I make these meatmallows?
Well, I made sugar-free marshmallows a while back
using beef gelatin powder, and I mentioned that no,
the gelatin didn't make them taste like steak.
Of course a buddy of mine just had to say, but can they?"
- Okay.
- So she made these. Let's taste it.
Was this easy to make?
- [Nicole] Quite easy actually.
- Is there protein in it?
Could get old toothless people gnaw this stuff down
and get their steak fix?
- Yeah, and I'd love to watch.
What?
- That's not good. (crew laughs)
What am I actually tasting?
- [Nicole] There's a little bit of beef stock,
some apple cider vinegar, Worcestershire sauce,
rosemary, garlic, onion.
- And smoke.
- It's doing something-- - Liquid Smoke?
- [Nicole] Just a touch.
- Before you put another piece in your mouth.
- I ain't putting another piece in my mouth,
I'm just gonna flop it around.
- Think about it like--
- To demonstrate the grossness.
- Oh, I think I just ate meat.
But the process of getting that down was like,
I'm eating something that I should be spitting out.
Like your body wants to reject it.
- Ooh, yeah, that, that is punishable by puncture.
- Now here's the thing though, Link,
is that we can't go out like suckers
and just both pick the same thing.
And because if we tie, we both have to eat the bad thing.
- Okay.
If we tie, we both have to eat it. I agree with that.
- Okay.
- Uh, I'm trying to formulate my answer.
- [Stevie] Three, two, one.
- It's gotta be this.
- So we agree. - It's gotta be this.
- But do you wanna, do you wanna, you want to trade
for the sake of, you know what, I'll do it.
I'll be glad to trade because either,
if I'm still wrong, I was already eating it.
- I like the way you think.
Porn.
- [Stevie] 69% of the mythical beasts
thought that ketchup and mustard cake
was the bigger food crime.
(Link Laughs) - You were right!
- Got you!
- Or you know what, y'all were wrong,
'cause it's actually really good.
- Like so good.
- It's so good.
- All right, bring in the other food crime that you've made.
- All right, what's the food crime?
- [Nicole] This is my raisin surprise.
- Raisin surprise.
- [Nicole] You wanna know what's in it?
- Jelly beans.
- I see fish.
- [Nicole] Yeah, there's Vegemite, marshmallow fluff,
jelly beans, mini pepperonis, and anchovies.
- [Rhett] I gotta make sure I get an anchovy.
- Man, I'm so glad that I switched.
You know, I became the bigger man and the correct guy.
I didn't know those two things could happen.
- All right, I've got everything that's in here.
♪ Food crime ♪
♪ Nicole is demented ♪
- You know, not much of a surprise, Nicole, I hate it.
- [Nicole] Did you notice there's no raisins in it?
That's the surprise.
- Ha, I love Nicole when I'm winning.
- [Both] Thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell.
You know what time it is.
- Hi, I'm Melissa Martin from Truman, Arkansas,
and we're in the middle of Snowmageddon,
so I made different flavors of snow cream
and ranked them from favorite to least favorite.
And my favorite was Oreo.
It's time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality.
- Get some of that Arkansas Oreo snow cream.
- Her kitchen looked just like
me and Mom's kitchen growing up.
- Yeah, it did.
Maybe she was, maybe she broke in.
(both laughing)
Click the top link to watch us guess what two crazy candies
have been combined in "Good Mythical More."
- And to find out where
the Wheel of Mythicality is gonna land.
- [Nicole] Ketchup is a smoothie.
- [Josh] Yeah, I put ice in my cereal, so what?
- [Nicole] That makes no sense.
- [Josh] A hot dog is a sandwich.
- [Nicole] A hot dog is a sandwich.
(both laugh) - [Josh] What?