-Guys, it's time for our bit called "Bad Signs."
Here we go. Let's check it out. ♪♪
♪ Ain't we lucky we got 'em? ♪
♪ Bad signs ♪
-Time for this bit.
-These are pictures -- Yeah, I know, exactly.
I just showed them. -Yeah.
-These are pictures of funny or weird signs
that you guys saw in real life and sent in to us.
These are all real,
and I appreciate you guys sending in to us.
This first one was sent in by
Michael Morrissey in Fort Wayne, Indiana.
It is a sign he spotted on a gate outside of a park.
Look at this thing right here. It says...
"Hey! You hear me? Either open it or close it."
-[ Imitates gate creaking ] -Yeah.
Next one was sent in by
Stephen West in Salisbury, North Carolina.
-Ooh! -He's from North Carolina.
He was shopping and he saw this.
"Clearance -- $16.77."
Look at the old price. $16.78.
You know, clearance.
We're getting this stuff out of here.
We're wiping this stuff out of here!
Get it out!
This next one was sent in by
Clea Woodrow in Birmingham, Alabama.
She was browsing her local bookstore and saw this sign.
Can we just zoom out a little bit?
It's all serial killers. -Oh!
Wow! Hmm.
-Interesting. -Hmm.
-This next one was sent in by
Bonnie Ketter in Montgomery, Illinois.
-Ooh!
-It is a sign that she spotted while driving to work.
It said...
Just go figure it out.
Just open or close the -- just open or close it. Just --
-Either way. -I don't want to know.
I don't even want to know.
Just open or close it. -I'm on my way to open it.
-Don't talk to me. I'm very busy.
-I'm closing it now. -Whatever you do.
I don't want to get involved. Just have it open or closed.
Left lane is closed, by the way. But only use the left lane.
So they used the right one,
because that was the only one that was...
-Open. -...left.
-Oh. Nice. Nice! "Left" as in "remaining"!
♪ He took the play on words ♪
-♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh, snap ♪
♪ You did a play on words ♪
-♪ Oh, snap ♪
-♪ Oh ♪
♪ Oh, snap ♪
♪ You did the play on words ♪
-♪ Oh, snap ♪
-Yep. Yeah, 'cause that was it.
-Yeah. -They were snapping.
Another play on words. They added a bonus -- Yeah.
And they had a Slim Jim was there, too.
[ Clicks tongue ]
-"Slap open a Slim Jim!" -Yeah.
This next one was sent in by
Rachel Werner in Atlanta, Georgia.
She is a teacher and she was given this sign
by one of her student's parents that said...
Close enough.
-All the teachers were fired.
-This next one is from Erik Risk,
right here in Brooklyn, New York.
-Hey! Brooklyn, hey!
-It was a sign that he spotted in
his apartment building's mail room.
It said...
"Yeah, okay." -"Sounds good."
-"Yeah, okay." "You got it, boss."
-"Yeah, okay." -Yeah.
And, finally, this last one was sent in by
Wade Alger -- or Alger, sorry.
Wayne Alger in Dallas, Texas.
He was shopping in his local pharmacy and spotted this.
The men's-shave aisle right next to the nuts aisle.
-You know... [ Cheers and applause ]
I bet -- -What's that?
-I bet the guy who did that got sacked.
[ Laughter ]
-That's all the time we have for "Bad Signs."
If you see a funny sign, you can e-mail it to us at
badsigns@tonightshow.com, and we might put it on the show.