hey Dan here and in this video I want to share a bit about my experience as an ENFP
working with an ISTJ this channel as you know is primarily for NF personality types ENFPs INFPs
INFJs and ENFJs but I want to take a look at other types in terms of how we can work together
in life friendships partnerships business whatever it happens to be
And I have to apologize here really right off the bat because
for a while on the channel I would insert ISTJ as kind of the go-to type
to be let's say the opposite of an ENFP in somewhat of a derogatory way like the
light-hearted way but a little bit in that way you know the ISTJ accountant or whatever else
and that was that was lazy humor to be honest it wasn't really pulling off a lot of personal
experience with it it was just kind of going with a running joke that other people make so I wanted
to share a lot of my experience now working uh closely with an ISTJ for quite a bit of time
the first thing that I think is really interesting and if you are an ENFP or INFP
this is really I think valuable is I find when I'm working with TJs or interacting in any way
and with an ISTJ in this case it regulates my own mood and emotion quite a bit because I don't
I gotta think through kind of why this happens maybe I'll do another video on this at some point
but there's sort of that mirroring effect with emotions right we all have mirror neurons
and you adjust the people around you and so I found that if I am with
someone who is more of a rock and they're not going to be overly emotional or get caught up
in things on some level I sense that that they're basically not going to put up with my and it will
adjust my own mood in terms of how I am or if I am a bit off and whatever it is having a bad day
it won't snowball and grow it will sort of stop when we start talking or when we meet
whereas I have found like with NF types is sometimes the mood can become contagious
with F-types in general actually even like EDFJs the mood can become contagious
and then it's harder to pull out of this bad spot because now you're with like six people
who are all in this place and you're like oh god now we're all in a bad mood how do we change this
it's um it's really interesting I found that as a as a significant benefit
the other thing with that but on more of a big picture level is ISTJs tend to be kind
of the steady consistent foundation type people they're going to be reliable they're going to
generally pay more attention to the past and be more realistic with their decision making
and I find that even knowing that I'm going to be talking about things within ISTJ and that there'll
be some of that not judgement in a negative way but their judgment applied to things I will
pre-reflect on things so I will be a little less all over the map than I would have been
in the past just anticipating that conversation if that makes sense um so it's almost like um
not a self-censorship but kind of self-adjusting in a way with it
and I I do find this to some extent with other types as well I have quite a few entj friends and
there's some element of of that as well now this may not apply to all ISTJs this video is about my
experience in particular but the ISTJ I work with seems to understand people quite well actually
and be very accepting as well in terms of different personality styles life choices etc so
sometimes when you don't get into too much details of types and you just think ISTJ okay they're a tj
they're very about the rules and the structure and everything else it's easy to assume that
they're going to be more of let's say a hard ass which estjs especially probably are but
my experience has been quite positive in terms of the understanding of people and dynamics and
everything else in that in that way I've also found that ISTJs can be very good with decision
making and judgment but from a totally different perspective than ENFPs so wherever my judgments
come from that's usually more of an intuition a feeling uh kind of future oriented thinking about
the different possibilities with some element of the past and my own experiences where I have found
the longer I've worked with this ISTJ the better her judgment becomes because ISTJs kind of learn
from their experiences and the obviously the longer you do something the more information you
get the more data you have to go on and the better judgment that you can have so I'm discussing more
of a work relationship but this same dynamic would definitely apply in a personal relationship I've
interviewed ENFPs before who are married to ISTJs uh in the interview I'm thinking of it's an ENFP
mom and an ist dad of way too many kids they're very happy with that many kids it seems like a
lot of children to me and they make it work really well and she says it's a really positive dynamic
and I have found that the dynamic between an ISTJ and an ENFP it leads to more stability
I would say probably better decision making overall more fairness I think fairness is a really
good way to describe the ISTJ way of thinking and ENFPs we're all about justice but because we're
not necessarily perfect with how we're evaluating people maybe it's by feeling or other things our
justice can be way off and so we value a sense of fairness but that does not mean we necessarily are
as good at making fair decisions I found this as well talking to entjs especially in business where
they're colder they they will fire someone really easily they will be harsher about things but
they're actually pretty damn fair with how they make decisions they just don't get too
emotionally caught up whereas as an ENFP I might think I'm being a better person I might
really not want to fire someone or give people a lot of chances or like stay in
a relationship too long although I don't think I've ever really done that but in theory but
my actual actions won't be as objective where an entj might not worry about firing people but it
will be fair they'll have reasons and that person will probably be better off because they'll say oh
I was a shitty accountant okay now I can go on and get the job I really wanted to be a painter
I'll go do that instead so I've found that interesting where I think often us ENFPs we
we think we're being fairer because of this sense of empathy but if you actually look at our actions
they don't always have a more positive result on the other people or our organization or that
so I found that the dynamic working with a TJ and an ISTJ has been really positive and I assumed
this would happen with parenting as well right where you'd have um one parent who's much more
objective and can set the rules and stick to it and the other who's going to be more empathetic or
whatever else so that's my experience what I want to know in the comments is what is your experience
like working with ISTJs or if you're an ISTJ who's come across this video what has your experience
been like working with ENFPs or other NF types we'd love to hear from you below in the comments
and if you are new to the channel my name is Dan I publish new videos
each and every week helping you become the best version of yourself
all while creating the most awesome life possible for you and those you love so
hit the bell hit the subscribe button and catch you in the next video soon and if you are an
ENFP I do actually have a free training program I've created for my fellow ENFPs if you go to
DreamsAroundtheWorld.com/ENFPtraining or click the card that will pop up here you can get access
to that free training it has some of my best advice things that I don't share anywhere else