- Yeah, I grew up in this family
and we couldn't live together.
I could live with my mom,
but my dad obviously couldn't live with us
'cause it was illegal,
and people would be racist to us all the time.
But I was really lucky growing up
because my mom is probably the most gangster human being
you'll ever meet in your life, right?
Nothing got to her.
(audience cheering)
Nothing phased her.
And I remember one day in particular,
we're walking through the streets together
and some guy crossed the road,
shouted something really mean at us.
And I was about four or five years old
and I turned and I looked at my mom and I said,
"Mommy, what do we do if people do the racism to us?"
And my mom said, "Oh baby, you know what we do
"if somebody's racist?
"We take that racism of theirs
"and we shake it up with the love of Jesus.
(audience laughing)
"And then we send it back."
(audience laughing)
And I was like, "What?"
(audience laughing)
And I was like, "This lady's crazy."
(audience laughing)
And she was crazy, but she was also right.
I didn't even realize how right my mother was
until decades later, which I feel is what always happens
with your parents, right?
They're crazy, and then you get to their age
and you're like, "Oh! That's what it means."
(audience laughing)
I only learned the lesson my mother was trying to teach me
when I was a grown man
and I was walking through the streets of Chicago
minding my own business and some guy drove by
in a pickup truck and called me the N word.
And I'm not gonna lie, I was disappointed,
mostly because he was driving a pickup truck.
(audience laughing)
Yeah, I just felt like that was an unnecessary stereotype
that he didn't need to perpetuate.
(audience laughing)
You know, I feel like if you're gonna be racist,
do something different, you know.
Think outside the box.
Drive a Prius.
(audience laughing)
Yeah.
It's better for the environment and it's quiet.
You can sneak up on me.
We both win.
(audience laughing)
But no, the guy, he was driving a pickup truck,
called me the N word, and oh, to give you the full story,
I was jaywalking, all right, I was jaywalking, yeah.
And I don't tell you this to justify what he did.
I just want you to know that I'm no angel, okay?
(audience laughing) Yeah.
All right, I was crossing the road
and then the light turned red for me
but I decided to walk anyways because I don't see color.
(audience laughing)
(audience cheering)
This man, this man was so offended by what I had done
that he drove his truck around me, rolled the window down,
looked me dead in the eye, and he was like,
"Get out of the road, nigger!"
Oh, and you could see he wanted to hurt me.
We locked eyes and I could see in that moment
he was waiting for me to be like, "No!"
(audience laughing)
But what that man didn't know was where I was from.
More importantly, who he didn't know was my mother
(audience clapping)
'cause he thought it was just gonna be a regular racist day.
(audience laughing)
He thought he was gonna drive by,
throw the N word out the window, carry on with his life.
He didn't realize that that was the son of Patricia
stepping into the road.
(audience laughing)
And it happened in a moment, but it lasted a lifetime
(audience laughing)
'cause I didn't even think.
He shouted that word and out of nowhere my body was like...
(audience laughing)
I was like, "Oh shit, this is it!"
(audience laughing)
And let me tell you something L.A.,
it was so beautiful because I didn't plan it.
I didn't think about it.
All I know is I stepped into the road,
he drove his truck around me, rolled the window down,
looked me dead in the eye, and he was like,
"Get out of the road, nigger!"
And I turned and I was like, "You're my nigger!"
(audience laughing)
And he almost crashed and died.
(audience laughing)
Yeah, I've never seen a human being question themselves
so many times in a split second in my life, right,
'cause I was smiling and I could see in his face,
he was like, "Wait, do I know you?
(audience laughing)
"Do I look like someone you know?"
And I don't know why he did this, but I'll never forget it.
He looked at his hands.
(audience laughing)
He looked at his hands
like they had somehow magically turned black.
Like I... (audience laughing)
Like I had cursed him with a nigger bomb.
I don't even know what he was thinking.
(audience laughing)
Hey guys, thanks for watching.
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