We're never not classy here at Nicki Swift.
Once again, we've gone ahead and done the dirty work for you, tracking down several
celebs who seemingly farted on live TV.
You won't be able to believe your eyes, or your ears.
Let's all hold our noses...and dive deep.
You're really tempting fate with a name like Nancy Grace.
While competing in a 2011 episode of Dancing with the Stars, the bombastic TV journalist
may have succumbed to an on-air butt-blurt, and right on the heels of her highly publicized
wardrobe malfunction the week before.
"It was a bit top-heavy at times, my darling."
As you can hear for yourself, Grace offered up what might be her most noxious soundbite
to date.
"I saw them several times during the dance and they were smiling so big."
[fart]
"Well, let's see if the judges can give us something to smile about on this very emotional
night."
This one is most assuredly not Fake Fart News.
During a 2017 Fox News interview with professional gasbag Jeanine Pirro, 2016 presidential candidate
Ben Carson was enthusiastically discussing something called "The EnVision Program."
And shortly after he recited a bit of scripture, it sounds like some "divine intervention"
swept in.
"And, you know, the Bible says in the book of Proverbs, 'Without a vision, the people
perish.'
[fart]
And, I discovered…"
This nasty news nugget was overlooked by most media outlets, but at least The Daily Show
caught wind of Carson's presumed pant-puffer.
Host Trevor Noah deadpanned:
"Ben Carson didn't just fart loudly on TV.
He did it while quoting scripture."
Noah goes on to say,
"Let's not let this hilarious moment distract us from the real issue: While supporting deep
budget cuts to his department, Carson is spending lavishly on dining sets, lounge furniture,
and $5,000 chairs, which is not okay."
"Unless that chair costs $5,000 because it has sophisticated fart-suppressing technology.
In that case, it's money well spent."
On April 15th, 2019, several online publications were trying to get to the bottom of what Deadspin
called a potential "cough-fart."
This wasn't your average alleged "cough-fart," either, because this potential "cough-fart"
was possibly perpetuated by sports commentator Max Kellerman, a co-host on ESPN's First Take.
During an already noisy conversation centered around pro basketball player Kevin Durant,
Kellerman quite possibly succumbed to an on-air, off-camera heinie hiccup.
To make matters even murkier, he might have attempted to conceal the sound of his fizzling
flatulence.
Listen and learn:
"He ain't scared of anything."
"Well is Draymond come to talk?"
"No.
But the difference is..."
[cough-fart]
"...that Draymond is usually arguing and fighting with the ref."
Here's an instant replay, in case you missed it:
"No.
But the difference is that Draymond..."
[cough-fart]
"...is usually arguing and fighting with the ref."
As Deadspin noted, and we quote,
"It very much sounded like someone coughed as a maneuver to cover up a fart."
It did, didn't it?
And the situation might be even more dire than that.
One bat-eared Redditor claimed Kellerman farted a total of seven times during the broadcast…and
this intrepid fan even time-stamped each presumed sphincter siren.
For example, he noted that the alleged anal acoustics included a so-called "little squish."
Can you hear it?
"On the other hand, maybe he learns his lesson early.
You know?"
And then there's this teachable moment, which the Redditor warns is, quote, "a bit quiet."
In our opinion, it's not quiet enough.
"...is less of an irritant than some, like…"
In its own unflinching story, AOL pointed out that
"[Kellerman] had some explaining to do."
And explain away he did: He appeared on The Dan Le Batard Show the next day and denied
that any of this ever happened:
"I will say this.
No I did not fart on the set.
I have farted in the past, though.
That is true.
But that is, that's not one of the instances."
Well.
By one Redditor's tally, it's seven of the instances.
Is there trouble brewing at ESPN?
It certainly sounds like it.
Former NBA star and current ESPN commentator Paul Pierce may have suffered his own on-air
indiscretion on May 8th, 2019.
According to TMZ,
"[He] farted on [co-host] Michelle Beadle."
This reportedly went down during a broadcast of Off The Clock, and Pierce's presumed passed
gas didn't exactly pass under the radar, either.
Here's how Beadle and sports analyst Jalen Rose reacted:
"Nasty."
"Michelle Beadle, smelling something in the air.
This gentleman here...That's an inside joke."
"We're trapped in a room, y'all."
Following the segment, ESPN producer Mike Goldfarb gave Pierce the benefit of the doubt,
tweeting that,
"Paul may or may not have farted at the start of the taping."
Doing her part to clear up any confusion, Beadle responded,
"No.
He did.
Period."
Judging by what we heard, that may indeed be The Truth.
Does the name Joe Swash ring a bell?
While he's yet to make waves in America, he's evidently breaking plenty of wind on the other
side of the pond, on television, no less.
The English actor and TV personality is perhaps best known for his stint on the British soap
opera EastEnders.
He played a character named Mickey Miller, a character who, coincidentally enough, gets
injured in a major gas explosion...
"Mickey!
We're sorry, Mickey!"
"Help us!
Do something!"
On February 12th, 2019, it sounds like Swash really let loose on an episode of the talk
show Loose Women.
While opening up about matters of the heart, he was rudely interrupted by an altogether
different part of his anatomy:
"...and then I will tell her what I think about her...rather than a letter."
This alleged fluffer-doodle reverberated through social media channels, with one startled viewer
tweeting:
"Did [Joe Swash] just fart live on tv?
Was he [brought] up with my dad in our council house?"
The answer to one of those questions seems to be a resounding yes.
What's more, this apparently wasn't the first time Swash emitted some "thunder from down
under" while filming a TV show: He also tooted his own horn while shooting an episode of
the children's show The Dog Ate My Homework, which you can clearly hear in this outtake.
"Ian, Captain Scott weren't from London...Sorry!"
Hey, whatever pays the bills.
British people are embarrassed easily; a fact that actor Leslie Nielsen apparently knew
how to exploit.
On June 20th, 1991, the Airplane! star perked up two daytime hosts with what sounded like
some impromptu rump ruckus.
The on-air awkwardness went down on UK morning show TV-AM.
"You really start to watch what's happening.
That's the other thing about the humor is you have to pay attention to it."
The hosts didn't let it slide, either:
"You're not going to ask me to leave, are you?"
"Well, maybe you'd just like to go to the little ladies room for awhile, or the gents
room."
"Oh, correct it there."
Later, Ulrika Jonsson presented the weather in Wales, quipping:
"I'm so sorry about this, we're suffering from wind here as well."
It's worth noting that Nielsen also appeared to have some trouble on the British chat show
Wogan back in 1989:
"I'm always associated with being a, you know, a man who has background and education and
I'm well-mannered and, you know, I have to protect...protect that image."
But in the grand tradition of "pull my finger," the late actor could've been pulling your
proverbial leg.
In 2015, Ted Danson told The AV Club:
"[Nielsen] had a handheld bellows-like thing that was a fart-noise maker...He was relentless!
Most people would do something like that, get a few laughs, and put it away.
He…would not."
Here's another working theory: Nielsen's tailwinds were genuine, and he only used this clever
contraption to cover his tracks.
Sadly, Nielsen took the truth, and his love for potty humor, to the grave.
According to Snopes, his gravestone in Fort Lauderdale's Evergreen Cemetery contains one
final fart joke: In lieu of the traditional R.I.P, Nielsen opted for,
"Let 'er rip."
A moment of silence?
Not a chance.
"Excuse me.
I don't know whether I can do this."
Check out one of our newest videos right here!
Plus, even more Nicki Swift videos about your favorite celebs are coming soon.
Subscribe to our YouTube channel and hit the bell so you don't miss a single one.