Mark: Hey, it's Mark here from Make Him Yours and today, I'm with Bryan Reeves, the relationship
insight ninja. And we are talking about 7 signs that he is not ready for love.
Now, if you haven't seen my other video with Bryan, it's fantastic. And we talked about how a
man falls in love, not the superficial or silly ways and signs, but the really deep
three stages that a man is ready to give you the loving relationship that you want and
deserve. So I've got Bryan back in. He's a former Air Force Captain. He's been featured
on Oprah, his blog content, crazy, tens of millions, 30 million views on a single post.
And today, Bryan we're talking about the signs that a guy's not ready to fall in love.
Bryan: Yeah.
Mark: If you have seen our other video, this is basically the signs of a guy who's in stage
one or stage two. That is, he might be able to say he can love you, but he cannot provide
the relationship that you want and deserve. So Bryan, let's get straight into it. What's
the number one sign?
Bryan: So the first sign is he has expectations that you're going to give him things in return
for what he gives you or doesn't give you. But he still has expectations, you know, and
it could be as simple as, you know, you see this a lot, you know, I heard this a lot actually
from women. Just a man gives you a compliment and then expect something in return.
"Hey, can I get a smile? Can I get a thank you?"
You know, makes you feel guilty for not giving
him back what he thinks he deserves. It could be the man that takes you out to dinner and
then has expectations that you're going to kiss him or sleep with him anything, right?
But when you can feel that those strings are attached, that there's expectations that is
not a man that is ready for love.
Mark: Number two is that he wants to do everything on his terms.
So this is particularly a sign of stage two that the guy might be independent,
but he's not willing to be interdependent with you.
He is happy to be there when it suits him. He's happy to operate and serve
you on his terms as long as it's convenient and fits in with his life plan.
But as soon as it's a bit inconvenient or as soon as things get a bit tough,
that's when that's right, He's out of there.
Number three is that he expects you to take care of yourself.
Now this one leads needs a little bit of explaining, Bryan.
Bryan: Yeah, so look, it's a good thing that women can take care of themselves. That's
a good thing, especially in the modern age, in this modern day, that's such a good thing.
However, in intimacy, in the beautiful dance of masculine and feminine intimacy, there
is a really beautiful dynamic between masculine and feminine energy
where the masculine shows up as the provider, the protector, and
I don't necessarily mean financially, it's really an energy thing.
So if a man is coming at you though with "You need to take care of
yourself," notice even my hand, "You need to take care of yourself." Whether that means
the expectation that you are going to take care of yourself financially,
pay your own way. Pay, and again, there's a room for agreements.
I'm not saying it's not about the details, it's about the energy, right?
So if a man is showing up with language that essentially says,
"Don't expect me to take care of you, you need to figure life out for yourself or
you need to figure out your bills for yourself."
That's a real red flag that he is not ready for love.
Mark: Number four is that he says or does things that keep you at a distance.
So whether it's he's on for three days and off for three days or you know,
things are going great until you sleep with him, and then you just feel this wall come up.
There's just, you get this hot-cold pattern. There's this erratic feeling where things,
your intuition just tells you that that things don't make sense,
that something is coming up between the two of you.
There's this natural kind of intuitive style of anxiousness and distance
that comes up where you, you feel like,
"Nah, see he's doing things that keep me at a distance."
It just doesn't feel calm. There's something wrong there.
Bryan: Yeah. Or he's saying things, he's dropping little hints, dropping little clues that,
"Hey, don't expect me to really be in relationship with you."
Mark: Exactly. Love it. Number five, I love this one, Bryan.
Bryan: This is one of my favorite. He feels deeply disconnected from his purpose in life.
This is huge! This really, um, causes a man to resist being able to just be present for
relationship. When a man and not all men, nothing is ever so black and white. But generally
speaking, a man who is masculine in his core needs to feel connected to his purpose, right?
And that could be a job that he's doing that he loves. It could be some cause that he's
activated in the world. It doesn't mean every man has to find that for himself,
but your relationship can't be the man's purpose. It never works to make a relationship
a man's purpose. If he's deeply disconnected from his purpose, he's not going to be able
to be present for the relationship. It's going to cause turmoil. It doesn't mean that you
can't have a relationship with this man, but just know that he is going to struggle being
present for love.
Mark: That is huge!
Bryan, what's one of the biggest signs that a man is not on his purpose?
Do you have a single thing that's just like,
Bryan: Yeah! He doesn't like his work. He complains about his work, complains about
his, I mean it does, it doesn't get any more simple than that.
Mark: Yeah. Number six is that he keeps contacts with his exes or other women in unhealthy
ways. So, you know, it's one thing if a guy is still friends with his ex, in fact that
can be really beautiful if they've mended and you know, you, you meet her and everything's
lovely, and it's really positive, but you will see a guy and it's almost another tactic to
just not fully invest, not fully dive in, not be fully vulnerable, where he's still keeping
these connections to other women, other romances
on a romantic level. And whether it's keeping
the two of you apart, or he's still messaging these women or, and it can even be not to
make us overthink, but it can even be his liking every photo, wanting,
commenting attention when he would never do that with any other women,
that's a big sign that he's kind of one foot in the door, one foot out,
and he's having some turmoil, and not ready for love.
Bryan: That's right. And also, even if it's not just an ex but just other women.
Mark: Yeah.
Bryan: And if he's, again, keeping that separation between you and his
experiencing with other women, huge red flag.
Mark: Absolutely.
Bryan: And number seven, this one's going to surprise you.
Mark: I love this one.
Bryan: He's disconnected from his own feminine. What does that mean?
Disconnected from his own feminine. Part of the essential evolution
of any man in a lifetime is learning how to embrace his own feminine side,
which means just a real simple way of putting it for right now. Really learning
how to feel his body, feel his emotions, feel his feelings, really inhabit his experience
in this body and not get all, you know, lost in our heads. A man who can really feel his
body, his emotions, his feelings is a man that will be able to be present with yours.
If he can't be present with, and I'll never forget,
my partner told me this, uh, my fiancee,
Sylvie, she was like, a couple months into our relationship, we got into a little tiff,
and afterwards, she sent me a text message saying, "You know, Bryan, I really care about
your feelings." And I remember my first thought was "Why? I don't even care about my feelings!"
And she was pointing at, again, a necessary part of my evolution as a whole man to really
embrace what I feel. And again, why is that important? In other words of wisdom, she told
me, "You're never going to be able to embrace my feelings if you can't embrace yours."
So, so important.
Mark: Another mic drop moment. Huge!
And that's, that's such a critical thing that most women think,
"Oh, I just want this guy to be really masculine and, and really [inaudible].
And it's really the connection to the feminine that makes
him a whole man and leaves him ready for love with.
Bryan, that was brilliant.
You are the wisest, most incredible man I know at this,
so thank you for coming in.
Hey, me and Bryan did another video as well on How Men Fall In Love,
so make sure you check that out. It's none of the superficial stuff. It's some
really deep, powerful, insightful content in that video. I'll post the link up here
and in the description below, and Bryan, you have an amazing program on boundaries.
Bryan: I do. It's ah called the Boundaries Program.
Relationships suck without boundaries
because they do. They do suck without boundaries.
Mark: They do. It's all in the title and the program is brilliant.
So make sure you check that out at bryanreeves,
Bryan with a 'y' .com/boundaries. We'll put the link on the screen.
Bryan, thanks so much for coming in.
Bryan: Pleasure, man. I really enjoy this. Thank you, Mark!
Mark: If you have thoughts, comments, questions for Bryan, for me,
thoughts in general, leave them in the space below.
Hit the thumbs up button as well with the big red subscribe button and the little bell.
I can't wait to see you In the next video very soon.
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