Hey folks, I'm here with KISS.
(crowd cheering)
Thank you.
Of course, Gene Simmons, Paul Stanley
This is Bruce Kulick, that's right.
And this is Eric Singer.
You got it. Over here, all right.
Listen, you-- And Conan O'Brien.
Conan O'Brien, thank you.
And of course, Andy Richter over here.
Andy. And we've got,
I should explain to people,
in case they were confused, people at home.
When your segment, your singing segment was starting,
you guys were trying to flick guitar picks
into our mouths. That's right.
You're getting very good catching them in your mouth.
Well, I'll have one talent, then.
(audience chuckles) We'll build from that.
But we'll have you back sometime.
Maybe we'll actually do it.
We'll accomplish it.
That would be very nice. Yes, I think
it's worthwhile. It's worthwhile.
It's a good cause.
It would waste more time,
which is what this show is all about.
(audience chuckles)
Now, we saw, Andy did a piece at the top,
where he went to the KISS convention.
And we have some people here tonight in the audience,
you guys have extremely loyal fans.
We've got the best fans in the world.
This is not something that we say idly
as a kind of a sound bite.
(audience cheering)
See this, now.
But you must have,
(audience cheering)
it begs the question, are there people that,
there must be people, you must encounter people
who just, you know, must say, "Oh, you changed my life."
Or you know, "When I was 16, you somehow"--
We've had amazing, amazing testimonials
at these conventions.
People coming in, obviously, wanting to get married
at the conventions, which is unbelievable in itself.
We've had like touching things,
where people would show up and say,
"I met my husband or my wife at a KISS concert."
There was one woman who showed up,
and said that her husband had died
just before the convention had taken place
and had been buried in a KISS T-shirt.
Now to some, that may seem crazy.
But to us, you know, what bigger compliment?
Our fans are like no other fans, I mean--
Yeah, that's a very cool thing.
The strangest things have been happening
at the KISS conventions.
We've had kids as young as seven years old,
getting up and playing our drum sets.
In fact, in Chicago, there's a seven-year-old kid
that got up, that played his butt off.
Just got up there and banged away.
[Paul] He literally fell off the stool.
(Conan laughs)
Yeah, we had to prop him back up.
It was funny.
And you know, the obligatory girl
who wants to touch Paul's chest hair,
you know, and do that stuff.
And Gene-- That felt good!
(Conan laughs) (Audience laughs)
[Conan] That's enough of that.
And the tongue thing always comes up,
and can you stick, you know, that kind of stuff.
The tongue.
You have an amazing tongue.
Can you just, tell us, please,
can't we see the tongue?
No, no, no.
Come on. (Crowd cheering)
No, just a little?
(Crowd cheering)
Just a little!
Just a little.
You know, it must be what women
with very large breasts must feel like.
Because when people come up to you first,
and they invariably say, what's your name,
And can I see your tongue?
(Conan chuckles)
So you're sick of being reduced to just a physical object.
No, no, I like to be a physical object.
(Conan laughs) (Audience laughs)
No, that's good.
I would really stick it out,
except the floor seems a little dirty today.
(Audience chuckles) [Conan] Oh, man!
But if you really want,
you have to come in for a close-up.
[Conan] Oh, let's get a close-up here.
This is worth it. It's really,
It's legendary. It's really not that big.
It just has a spin and dry cycle.
[Conan] Oh! (Audience cheering)
Oh! (Audience cheering)
My God!
(Audience applauding)
Oh! (moaning)
I would give all I have on this Earth
if I could do that.
All right. (Audience laughing)
I've heard there's other parts of you that spin!
Oh (laughing) no there aren't.
It's very sad. (Audience chuckles)
Now, what we want, we have to bring something up.
We had, you guys actually, you touched our lives.
Not too long ago.
Our own Andy Richter.
He was at the KISS convention and something happened,
and you guys actually caused Andy
to get into quite a lot of trouble.
It showed up in the newspaper.
Andy, do you want to, in a nutshell, say what happened?
After the group of us, who shot the remote,
went across the street to a steak house across the street.
And we were, someone in our group was wearing
a KISS convention T-shirt, that I believe Gene designed.
And it has a bit of profanity on the back,
(Conan laughs)
which we forgot about. How does that happen?
We forgot about.
And a baseball luminary got very angry at us.
I believe it was Pirates manager Jim Leland,
wasn't it? (Gene laughing)
Yes it was.
He came over.
And we were very polite.
And the member of the group who was wearing the shirt
said, "I'm sorry, I'll take it off."
He went nuts.
He went crazy. He went crazy.
And a brawl ensued. We at first thought
it was because he hated KISS.
And we were-- (Conan laughs)
We were ready to fight. It was just the F-word.
We calmed down. It was just the F-word.
Could it possibly have been that they lost
the last seven or eight games in a row or something?
(Conan laughing) (Audience jeering)
I don't know anything about baseball.
I was just told that perhaps he was upset.
It's a theory, it's a theory
that's as good as any other theory.
Make sure, we're out of time, but make sure I mention
KISStory is now out.
And this is a book which is available for people.
440 page, nine-pound book.
The entire history of the band.
It's signed by us.
And we did it.
We put this book together.
I love how you say it's a nine pound book.
That's like--
You can work out with it.
Look at that.
That's beautiful.
And we're out of time, now get out of here.
(Conan laughs)
Beautiful, it's a beauty.
And that's a very nice thing.
KISStory is available for KISS fans.
And guys, thank you very much for coming on the show,
and performing and just making it a really fun evening.
We really appreciate it.
Thanks for being a great sport.
(Audience cheering) Thank you very much.
We'll take a break, folks, we'll be right back!