Translator: TED Translators admin Reviewer: Lalla Khadija Tigha
Today, I want to talk to you about the idea of thriving on no.
That's pretty much how I've spent my entire career,
is trying to get past that negative synonym.
That initial response and being stimulated
by the adventure of trying to turn no into yes.
Now, if you could be stoked by no instead of discouraged by it.
If you could be challenged by it, instead of defeated,
you could get a lot more accomplished in your life and in your career.
Now, I spent three decades as a journalist.
I was at the Wall Street journalist, reporter and a senior editor.
I was the managing editor for Forbes for a better part of a decade.
I was an anchor at CNBC and Fox Business Network.
And when you're a journalist, you're stock and trade is no.
Company's tell you no comment.
Sources say, "No, I won't help you".
Your editor says, "No, I don't like your story idea".
At the start of my career, reporter intern of the Detroit News,
well he left the profession after only one year in it,
and it's because a little old lady in Albuquerque,
who's doing a nice cute little story on her,
would not even talk to him for the story.
She was too afraid.
He said, "I don't want to spend my entire career being told no,"
and I thought, but isn't that the fun part trying to get to yes?
He didn't think so and so, he joined big oil as an accountant.
Now, no gets a bum rap in America
because America is the land of opportunity,
the land of hope,
and yes is a much more popular thing than no.
No is from the wrong side of the tracks.
In American, we had a popular band years ago called Yes,
We had that Jim Carrey movie, Yes Man.
We've got that sports montra from Marv Albert, Yes.
Yes is such a positive response but no,
no is so negative, no is just the denial of hope
and all we hope to get done.
No parking, no smoking, no loitering,
no doing any of all of those things, at the same time, in the same place.
I think it's time to reframe no.
I think that if we can change the way we look at no,
we could feel better about it and we can accomplish more.
We could realize that no is nothing more than a stop on the pathway to yes.
And keep in mind, without no we would not enjoy yes nearly as much.
(Laughter)
The few times, a few years ago,
I got one of the biggest no's of my career.
I was at the Fox Business Network, I was an anchor,
and they decided no, we don't want to renew your contract,
15 minutes before I was told to get my briefcase and leave the building.
That's the way they do it these days when they fire someone.
And I went to almost every other major network,
saying, "Hey, I am available!" No.
I went to other media outlets, not in television,
and hey man, I'm coming back into print. No.
I tried three or four of the biggest PR firms in the world.
No, no, no, you're no PR guy.
And I just thought, you're playing with me that's all.
And so, I came up with a book proposal
and my agent got his book proposal looked at by 16 different publishers,
and every one of them said no.
But you know what? It turns out no just opens up a way for yes.
Because, I ended up having a book come out earlier this year,
I teamed up with the world's best crisis whisperer, Mike Sitrick,
and we wrote a book together.
That is, I assisted him in writing it.
There's a with Dennis Kneale, biggest by line of my entire career there.
(Laughter)
Now, working with Mike Sitrick on this book
gave me a two year crash course in crisis communications,
and taught me enough to where I could go out on my own.
And in the art of consulting, now, where I'm out on my own doing this stuff,
I get a lot more no's.
I've learned that consulting is the art of persuading people
to pay you to give them advice
that they then feel very empowered to ignore.
So that's alright though,
(Laughter)
as long as they pay the bills, right?
Now, so that was a good thing and that's given me a new lease on life.
Now, if you're the founder of a startup, you're accustomed to a lot of no's too.
You try to raise money and they tell you no.
You try to tell your story to the media and reporters tell you no.
Now, I could tell you how to go about turning that no into yes.
I could tell you how you emphasize three key aspects of every good story
and that is conflict, drama, and struggle.
I could tell you how you have to wrap yourself in a problem
that became your obsession to solve,
and that that become your company and that's what you sell.
I could tell about the small man, big picture technique
to give your story national significance.
I could tell you all of those things,
but then I'd have to charge you $600 an hour.
So instead, I leave you with this.
The trick is to realize that no simply is one more step on the way to yes.
And so that, we have to realize that when we see a big fat no sitting there,
you can zoom out in the distance,
kind of look at it in a different way
and realize that that's not no, that's not no at all.
That's just the start of not yet.
(Laughter)
Thank you very much!
(Applause)