(audience cheering) - Please welcome
my friend, Lilly Singh!
(dramatic music) (cheering continues)
- I'm so happy (indistinct)
(crosstalk)
- [Drew] Finally!
- Hmm, thank you for having me.
- And- - Thank you for having me,
and hi everyone!
(audience cheering)
- I really wanna hear from you
because I've been reading the book
but I wanna hear from Lilly Singh, what does it mean?
Be a triangle?
- Yeah, absolutely.
Well, first of all, I have to fight for this title
because my publisher was like, "Be a what now?"
(audience chuckles) And I was like,
"No, I promise this makes sense"
but I don't know if anyone can relate, during the pandemic,
It wasn't just that I had nothing to do.
It was that without work and being busy
and having my calendar full, I truly start to feel
like I didn't have a purpose.
And that was a really sad feeling to have.
And I realize it's because I have never done the work
to attach a value to anything beyond work.
I have never had value in just myself
and my friendships and my moments and my peace.
And so I went on a mission to build a solid foundation
in my mind, you know? (audience applauding)
Yeah.
And I know foundation is kind of a fluff word
but what I mean by that is a safe space
in my mind that I can return to
that was not tied to any external accolade.
And so when I Googled strong foundation,
a triangle showed up cuz it structurally the strongest shape
in the world with a strong foundation.
So I thought I'm gonna build my life like a triangle.
(Drew chuckles) - Okay.
(audience clapping)
- And you know, in the book I write about
how this is something we're taught from a really young age,
you know, in school, how are you rewarded?
Grades.
Then you get into paychecks and promotions.
And so every everything we're taught as a kid
is always this very material tangible way of growing.
But then I start to question as an adult.
What if I have a day where I actually was
a lot more patient than I usually am?
Is that not a successful productive day?
Because we were never taught that that is something
that should measure growth.
- It should really- - It should be,
it should be, you know, it should be.
(audience applauding)
- You're right.
And when you're a kid you're always asked
"What are you gonna be?" - Yes!
- "What are you gonna do?" - Yes.
- What's gonna be your job, your life, your occupation.
And it perfectly dovetails into...
I have a clip of your work from 2014.
- Oh, my God...
- And so instead of what are you gonna do?
Who are you gonna be?
I wanna look back on it and then talk about it.
Take a look. - Okay, yay!
(audience laughs)
- Okay. Are you not the cutest,
sassiest, sexiest... (Lilly guffaws)
By the way, I wanna be at this party,
(all laughing)
because it's fun. - Oh my go... oh, yeah,
here we go- - I wanna-
(crosstalk) (Lilly clapping)
- Priorities as a young'un, baby.
- Oh yeah, baby.
- Wow...
- So you look back at that, you know,
what do you think when you see that?
- So this was pretty early in my YouTube career,
you know, and the toughest, and let me just preface this
by saying I love social media.
I think it's a great tool.
It is how I have my job, disclaimer, disclaimer,
but it is also a double edged sword.
You know, a lot of my career really kind of
messed me up mentally because the only
measure of success was numbers.
It was views.
It was subscribers.
So while shooting this video, I probably was thinking
that how can I make this trend
and how can I make sure that this thumbnail
is really enticing, so it gets a lot of views
and all of that's great and it is important
to run a business but I would be lying if I said
that at the end of the shoot, did I think,
"Did you have fun, Lilly?"
I only just now started to prioritize fun in my life.
In fact, when I was backstage about to walk out
I said to myself, your only goal,
it is not to sit perfectly on the stool.
It is not to speak perfect words.
It is just to have fun.
It is to be able to go there, be yourself
have an authentic connection with someone,
go home and say, "That was an amazing memory."
(audience applauding) You know?
- I mean, you just have so much to say
and you take breaks, right?
- Hmm. - You advocate breaks,
which I really, really love.
I was with, I'm not namedropping,
but I can't help it- - Do it, do it, do it!
- So excited, Olivia Rodrigo!
(Lilly acclaiming) (audience cheering)
Aah, I know! - You're so famous.
- I like- - You're so famous!
- She's so famous. - Yeah, you are!
- She is, and I got so much wisdom from this young woman
and we're just having this amazing conversation.
And we were talking about like, how could we
if there's meatless Monday
why are there not cell phone free blah-di-blah's?
- Yes, yes!
- You know, Sundays, like the whole...
What I think there should be a mission
of like put it down- - Hm mm?
- walk away and just force yourself away.
If it's an hour, a day, a week, a month, you know,
how, what do you think?
- I... - I know you practice that.
- Absolutely. And speaking as someone who,
I have an entire part of my career
and I even have my first book
is all about hustle, hustle, hustle,
pull the all-nighter, do all the work.
And this book is a lot different.
And I think the issue is that as humans
we're encouraged to be very all or nothing.
I think the internet is very, "You pick one side,
"you can't be in the middle,"
but progress is in the middle, you know?
And so we don't have to decide between this mindful life
where now we just meditate for 10 hours a day
and you don't ever work hard versus you work all the time
and never take breaks.
Progress is in the middle.
For example, right now this week I am on a book tour
and I'm gonna do a lot of press and there probably
will be very few breaks.
That doesn't mean that next week I cannot then be like,
"And now I can turn off a little bit."
I think we need to know that progress is in the middle.
We can have both things.
- Oh God, I love you (audience applauding)
so much.
(inspirational music)