[music playing]
My name is Andrew, and I'm 19 years old.
Come on, Freckles.
I don't think my brain is wired for me to be neat and tidy.
It actually drives me a little nuts
when things are too clean and organized.
For me, walking through this house is natural.
I know how to balance myself.
I know where to step, where to go.
So it's not really a problem.
I've always been in this type of environment,
and I learned the hoarding from my mom.
I don't know how else to live.
I'm Jean, and I'm Andrew's mom.
I haven't made a great deal about his hoarding,
because I do the same thing.
He's learned it from me.
It has become ingrained in him, as well as in me.
ANDREW: I think the fact that both of us
are participating in it makes it a vicious cycle.
[music playing]
My name is Chris.
I'm 25, and I'm Andrew's brother.
My brother, he's 19.
Andrew.
I love him.
He is stuck in that house.
When I saw my brother's bedroom, the first thing I thought of
was my mother's bedroom.
I couldn't believe it, that he had taken on the same traits
that my mother did.
I hesitate to blame my mom.
But, I mean, it's just the situation we're in.
She led me to disorganization.
I cannot say that he shouldn't blame me,
because he should blame me.
I am responsible for it.
[music playing]
I was too young to know what was going on.
I never remember my dad being around.
My father-- the best way of saying, he was a bastard-coated
bastard with bastard filling.
I mean, he was not the best guy.
When I went through my divorce,
it was a very, very painful thing for me that
was totally out of my control.
I had no recourse.
I couldn't say no, I don't want the divorce.
[music playing]
When my mom was drinking, she pretty much just stayed
in her room, isolated herself.
When she was done for the day, she'd just go in there
and watch TV or read some romance novels
and kill a box of wine.
JEAN: They had to make their own meals.
They had to dress themselves.
They had to wash their own clothes.
They had to do all these things that a traditional mother would
do.
I tried to get away from that house as much as I could.
I would spend all of my time at my friend's house.
I would spend time just walking around the city.
JEAN: I was a failure as a mother.
[music playing]
This is an emotional problem.
This is deep-seated.
I think they feel that their lives
have some sort of emptiness without the clutter.
They need to have stuff.
Andrew has had 15 years to watch me hoard things.
While it's only been 15 years for me, and I'm over 50 now,
it has been his whole life.
It's his way of coping since he was four years old.
ANDREW: It scares me to think that I'll be a hoarder forever,
and I'll never be able to live any other way.
[music playing]
DOROTHY: Good morning, everybody.
Good morning.
Thank you for being here.
I am Dorothy Breininger.
I'm a professional organizing expert,
and I specialize in hoarding.
Why are we here?
Why do you want all of us here?
Why?
So we can have a clean house.
DOROTHY: In this case, Andrew is 19 years old.
He is the youngest self-admitted hoarder that I've met.
This is going to be new for me.
I'll be whispering in your ear, but I'd
like for you to manage the crew some of the time
and actually help them and your mom
get this house up and running.
OK.
DOROTHY: OK?
Teaching organizational skills to Andrew will be a key.
This is not like we're taking a hoarder who is 40 or 50 or 60
and having them undo these bad habits
that they've had for years.
We can actually affect a change and teach
him now the kind of skills that he can use going forward.
OK, so we're going to get going.
But actually, I'd like you to give the direction.
So please tell the crew that let's get going,
let's head into the house and start on the living room.
OK.
Let's get going.
Start in the living room.
Let's go.
Perfect.
Yes.
[music playing]
Maybe get the things behind the door, so we can actually
open the door all the way.
Hear that?
Leadership on my very right-hand side.
I love it.
[music playing]
What is it that you think you need or needed that your mom
was not able to give to you?
She was just like, go away.
And that's what she did when she came home.
She just stayed in her room, and she checked out as a parent.
[music playing]
I really always looked to my grandmother.
When my mom couldn't take care of something, she would.
What did it feel like to have your grandmother in your life?
Um--
And what are you going to miss?
I really missed just walking into her house
and feeling like I was home.
I'd walk in the front door, and she'd
be there with a warm smile.
Her warm smile said to you what?
What did it say to you?
It said that she was happy I was there.
She was glad to see me.
Every child should have that, to know that someone's
happy that they're there.
[music playing]
Now I just feel like I don't have anybody.
[music playing]
Really old cake.
How-- is it really old?
Well, if it has--
go like this, and feel dust on it, just toss it.
Pen/calculator.
Ooh, can be helpful.
I need an office supplies area, huh?
Yeah.
I'm feeling a little frustrated right now,
because I look at it like they're
going through a treasure hunt right now.
They're looking for buried treasure
that they haven't seen.
See, most of this stuff, I would just
end up tossing all together.
They're picking through the treasure instead
of tossing out the sand.
Mom.
Popcorn tin. - Is it empty?
Yeah.
Is it-- can it be used for, like, cookies and stuff?
I guess.
CHRIS: They know that there's only a certain amount of time
left, and they won't be able to get it all done
if they keep this up.
[music playing]
We're going to go left to right, and let's get to it.
Because we're going to clear this out, and then
get right onto the middle room, and then
move on to Andrew's room.
We're going to each take a bag and start
clearing the cans and bottles.
OK.
Would you?
I--
Would you help?
Why are we saving my room for last?
Because we can't do two at once.
We can't?
So.
OK.
All right?
But we better get to it.
Oh, really?
I mean, if my room is the one that doesn't get clean
because we run out of time, you have no idea
how angry I'm going to get.
Really?
I'm challenging you to help your mom right now.
OK?
And to do the very best that you can
to help her when you know that what you want
is a priority to you.
I mean, I really, really think I should be working on my room,
but we've been working on the rest of the house
this whole time.
We can look at the surface and go, God, this kid,
he doesn't know how to work.
He's oppositional, and he doesn't want to work.
The truth is Andrew doesn't know how
to give a voice in a healthy way to what's inside of him.
Well, I mean, if I'm going to be literally
given no other options, I--
No.
I mean, you could say, to heck with it.
I'm going to go do my room.
But you have to let everybody know that you're not
going to cooperate, and why.
Well-- I'm not going to cooperate with this--
Tell them.
Not me.
No.
They're not listening to me.
Well, get them to listen to you.
No. It doesn't matter.
They never listen to me.
No one listens to me.
No one values what I have to say.
Well, you get them to.
You get them to value what you have to say.
[music playing]
Get your mom's attention.
Tell her to turn around, look at you.
Well, I don't have a problem with what my mom's doing.
Dorothy is making me--
making us work here first.
Got it.
So I'm here. - OK.
You tell her.
Tell me.
I think this plan of action is [bleep]..
If we work on two rooms that my mom has been hoarding forever,
then we aren't going to get to my room.
I'd love for you to join us.
If you'd rather do your own room, I--
You know what?
At this point--
--I understand.
I can't do either of that.
I need--
OK.
[music playing]
I'm not going to talk about whose
room should be done first.
I want to find out what's really going on here.
There's a person inside of you that's
really hurting and upset.
I just don't know what value the relationship with my mom
has when these things are gone, when we don't have
hoarding in common anymore.
The hoarding gave you what?
Hoarding with your mom gave you what, really?
A bond.
Yeah.
And that's what you really want.
I feel like she's just going to go to work every day
and forget I exist.
At 19, it's the time in Andrew's life
to say, I'm moving forward.
It's not the time for him to make
up for losses in his childhood.
He can only say, I'm sad and angry about what I didn't get.
Your mom has lots to learn, and if she-- we
don't know if she'll ever learn, and that's
what you're facing, huh?
You don't know if she'll ever get it,
and you might have to just accept that.
[music playing]
Can I ask you to put the bag right here?
OK.
Thank you.
[music playing]
I think Andrew is doing a really good job getting
rid of the stuff in his room.
He really is sticking with it, and he is throwing things out.
And there's not going to be much left in his room.
[music playing]
We took a lot out of this house.
I figured we would, because there was just so much trash.
Really, by far and away, this is the most trash I've
ever extracted from a house.
We took out seven tons of trash, and one ton of that
was donation.
I think the most important thing
I took away from this whole process
is hoarding isn't any way to live.
And you absolutely need to create the best situations
for you, because you can't expect
other people to do it for you.
[music playing]
Andrew is a wonderful candidate for therapy.
I think Andrew needs somebody who
can really hear his feelings and help him become a man.
[music playing]
ANDREW: I think I definitely have a greater chance
of success than my mom does.
It's very possible she'll just continue
the way she's been living.
If-- and I think this is a big if--
I go back to the hoarding, he can move on.
He can go live somewhere else, and I'd be OK with that.
On the other hand, I don't want to let
him go, because he is my baby.
ANDREW: My future is bright.
However, I don't know--
I don't know whether I'm going to be
able to include my mom in that.
I just love her so much, and I don't want to leave her behind.
[music playing]